The Real Me
by MyVikingBoyfriend
Summary: Sequel to He's Not There. While Eric was under a spell, he and Sookie exchanged blood, forming a bond that is more than Sookie bargained for. Now that he has his memories back, can Sookie still love and trust the real Eric? And how will they handle it when they discover that their bond is more significant to both vampire and fairy kinds than either of them expected?
1. Chapter 1: Flying Away

**Previously:** Since it's been a while since the previous two stories, I thought I'd give you a recap of what's gone on until now. In _She's Not There_, Eric bought Sookie's house and pined for her while she was in Faerie. Alas for Eric, his reunion with Sookie when she returned from Faerie didn't go as he hoped.

In _He's Not There_, Eric lost his memory thanks to Marnie and stayed with Sookie. They fell in love and exchanged blood, creating a two-way bond called the _blóðfesta_, which brings with it full emotional awareness of the other person and an ability to locate them geographically.

When Eric and Pam were kidnapped by Marnie, Tara and other coven members, Sookie was able to locate Eric using their bond, but unable to rescue him until later at the Tolerance rally. At the rally, Sookie enlisted the help of Lafayette and Jesus to fight the witches, and Lafayette channeled Godric, setting off a battle for control of Eric's body between Marnie and Eric's maker. Sookie broke Marnie's spell on Eric by blasting him with her faerie light and Tara killed Nan Flanagan, who wanted to take Sookie to the Authority for questioning.

**Where we left off:** Tara, Marnie and the other witches have been taken to the Authority for trial, Jesus and Lafayette have been glamoured to forget what really happened at the Tolerance rally and Sookie, angry at realizing how comprehensive her new bond with Eric is, tells him she needs time and space before they can ever be together.This story picks up immediately where _He's Not There_ ended. For a change of pace, this is in Sookie's point of view.

**Chapter 1: Flying Away**

Sookie

I could feel Eric flying away with my heart.

While that sounds like some corny metaphor, I mean that I could literally _feel it_ as he moved away from me in the night sky on his way back to Shreveport, like some kind of human GPS.

And the heart part? Although I had been the one to ask him to go, now that he was leaving, it was ripping me apart. The further he went from Bon Temps, the more I felt like a huge, sucking hole was in my chest where my heart used to be. Not just because I was upset by what had happened between us – although I was – but apparently because one of the effects of the blood bond we had formed was to make physical separation between us an _unpleasant thing_.

If you can call feeling like someone has gutted you and carted away your insides _unpleasant. _

Fucking Eric. Fucking bond. _Fucking stupid me._

I had closed the front door and locked it as soon as Eric had taken off into the darkness, waiting until I knew he was well on his way before letting the tears I had been holding back break free. I let my forehead sink against the doorframe, and let my sorrow and regret flow with profuse weeping and an unfortunate amount of snot.

But I didn't call him back. I could have, with this new bond that had driven us apart even though he said he had intended it to bring us closer together; all I had to do was summon him back with my feelings.

But I had sent him away for a reason. I had told him I needed time away from him – from the intensity of the bond – to think clearly about what I wanted with him. And if the wrenching ache in my chest wasn't proof that I had made the right – the _logical_ –decision, nothing was. Right?

I stepped back from the door, wiping my wet cheeks and runny nose on my hoodie sleeve. Gross, I know, but I was going to have to do laundry in the morning anyhow. After I had arrived home earlier in the night, emotionally and physically exhausted, I had realized that both my bed and the guest bed were still rumpled with sheets that Eric and I had made love on. Too tired to strip either bed and too upset with him to crawl into a bed we had recently shared, I had curled up on the couch, and tried to rest while I waited for him to finish up dealing with the aftermath of what had happened at the Festival of Tolerance. Instead, I had lain there, rehashing the dizzying events of the past few days, trying to make sense of what was going on, and trying to figure out how I should feel.

Which was tough, because even though he was still in Shreveport, I could feel Eric _feeling my feelings_ and then feel him sending me _his_ feelings to make me feel better.

And for a little bit, it worked, because I _would_ feel better and just feel the love I had for Eric…until I began to wonder if he was _making _me feel what I was feeling somehow, and I'd get mad all over again, which made him send more feelings and – well, you get the picture.

I didn't get a lot of rest while lying there waiting for him to finish dealing with the Authority so we could talk instead of just _feel feelings_ at each other.

And I wasn't sure I was going to get any rest now that we _had_ talked, either, because I still didn't feel like stripping any beds, especially now that my sinuses were all clogged from crying.

Grabbing a box of tissues and peeling off my soggy-sleeved hoodie, I crawled back onto the couch again, turning out the lights and pulling one of Gran's crocheted afghans over me. At least I had never _quite_ made love to Eric on the couch, although we had come close once before Bill had interrupted us.

Lying there in the dark, I could feel the tears well up again, and I just let them go, swabbing up the mess with handfuls of tissue until I just couldn't cry any more. If you had told me ten days ago that I would end up with my heart broken and my head aching from crying over Eric Northman, I would have thought you were crazy. But here I was, miserable, and worse yet, feeling his misery, too, although his seemed dulled by tiredness and a bleak blanket of emotional cold.

A good hour of crying later, but finally wrung out of tears, I turned over on the couch, closing my eyes more tightly and pulling one of the throw pillows close to my chest. Although I had finally stopped crying, I still couldn't stop thinking about how I had gotten into this mess.

I had always been attracted to Eric Northman, although if you had tried to get me to admit it, I would have lied to your face about it. (God knows, I lied to Bill enough times about it; he had an annoying habit of accusing me of having "feelings" for Eric whenever he felt insecure. And reminding me at those times what a liar and scoundrel Eric was. Which just made me stuff down any attraction for Eric even deeper, of course.)

But until Dallas, I truly hadn't felt anything more than a flickering lust for Eric that I did my best to smother since he also terrified me. Not that I was fool enough to let him see that; my Gran raised me to always face my fears and be strong, and I had followed that advice when it came to dealing with Eric Northman. I made it a point of pride to never let him see that he kind of scared me in a way Bill never had. It wasn't that I was afraid he was going to bite and drain me, although Bill like to remind me that was all Eric could possibly want from me, but with Eric, I always felt as if I was walking on the edge of a dangerous precipice that I could fall over before I even knew what had happened. I wasn't sure what was over that precipice…but I knew it was going to be something that changed _everything _for me, and that scared me in ways I can't begin to tell you.

I could say that it was seeing him with Godric on the roof that had changed how I felt about Eric, but it really started with the dream I had the night he first tricked me into taking his blood after the explosion in Godric's house.

Bill had told me before we had gone to bed that night that, having had Eric's blood, I could expect to be sexually attracted to the 1,000-year-old vampire, but the dream I had about Eric after I had fallen asleep had still been…unexpected. Even _shocking._

In the dream, Eric and I had been in bed together, having just made love, and he was telling me why I'd make a great vampire and I was playfully arguing with him. He was smiling and relaxed, his hair falling loose around his face instead of sternly slicked back with gel the way he normally wore it, and his hands were wandering reverently over my skin as if he was treasuring every inch. His voice had been soft, intimate, as he told me that he used to think I had no sense of humor and I, in turn, told him that he was just a big faker – that he was deep and full of love, not at all the cold, empty vampire made of stone I had imagined.

In the dream, I felt…happy. Beautiful. Loved. And _completely safe _with Eric.

Despite Bill's warning about what to expect after having Eric's blood, I had been puzzled over that dream when I woke up. It had been erotic, yes, with Eric and I stroking and kissing one another as we talked; but what stuck with me all the next day was not the sexuality but the _affection_ of the dream. I felt deep affection towards Eric Northman in that dream, and he had clearly loved me. That was not _at all_ what I expected a vampire-blood-fueled sex dream to be like.

I could understand if I had had a lusty, porn movie kind of dream about Eric after having his blood. He was, objectively speaking, a good-looking man who exuded sex without even making an effort. But I didn't understand why his blood would have made me feel so much _emotional_ longing for him, or why it would make him appear to be someone that was clearly – to my mind, at least – _nothing_ like the real Eric.

The first time I saw him after that dream – which was the night we met with Nan Flanagan and the Dallas vampires to debrief from the debacle at the Fellowship of the Sun— my eyes had been drawn again and again to Eric. He had been slouched across the room, his face grim and his lips tight as the AVL representative had quizzed his Maker, Godric, about the kidnapping and the bombing.

Despite the seriousness of the discussion, I found myself distracted, my sidelong glances lingering on Eric's tense face as I looked for any sign of the sweet, affectionate lover of my dream. I didn't know which I wanted more: to see that the softer, more open Eric in the dream was real or to know for sure that he was just a lie made up by Eric's blood inside me, that the real Eric was the unfeeling, lying, manipulative bastard I believed him to be.

But the way he had jumped to Godric's defense…the obvious love he had for his Maker…that had left me wondering if there was some small –_very small_— grain of truth in my dream.

And when I had seen the usually self-controlled Eric sink to his knees, his normally deep voice breaking with sobs as he pleaded with his Maker not to meet the sun, in that moment my dream lover and the wretched vampire on the roof were one and the same. As Eric left the roof at Godric's command, I had reached out to briefly take his hand in mine, assuring him that I would stay with his Maker as long as it took. And afterwards, I dreamed of offering Eric comfort in his grief. Offering _myself_ to him.

Of course, I hadn't _actually_ offered myself to him. Not only was I still with Bill, but, for all that I sometimes thought I saw glimpses of my dream Eric in the real vampire, he gave me plenty of other reasons to think it was just my imagination.

He had chained me up and offered me to Russell Edgington, for starters, like I was just some disposable bargaining chip, and that was _after_ he had given me a kiss that had felt like either the end of the world or the beginning of one.

I wouldn't even have been in a position for Eric to grab me as a tool in his power play with Russell if I hadn't let my secret soft spot for "dream Eric" lead me to Fangtasia to see why the he had sounded like he was saying goodbye earlier in the night. No, stupid me had gone running to Eric's bar to see what he meant about not being around anymore and I had ended up nearly losing my life as a result. All because of some silly fantasy I had about what Eric was _really_ like underneath his cold exterior, fueled by dreams where he was powerful but loving and gentle with me.

Now, remembering the mistakes I had made with Eric in the past, I shifted uneasily on the couch, turning to face outward into the room again. My head was still pounding, but at least my eyes were finally dry. Too dry, even; they felt like I had rubbed them with sand.

I could even blame what had happened over the past week with Eric on my foolishness over the Eric of my dreams. I mean, who falls in love in just a week with someone they just met? Seriously? But Eric without his memories had reminded me so much of the Eric I had dreamed about – even more gentle and kind than in my dreams, and so clearly good at heart – that I had let down my guard. For so many months I had wondered if what I dreamed was really some part of Eric, reminding myself all along that I had _no reason at all_ to believe it, when, suddenly, there he was, in the flesh, standing barefoot on a country road, half-dressed, shy and polite. Dream Eric. My _secret _Eric.

Obviously, I am an idiot when it comes to men. First, I was taken in by Bill, and now I had to wonder if I been taken in by a seemingly sweet Eric just because he reminded me of my ludicrous dream crush. I had tried to keep my wits about me while he was in the house, but little by little, Eric without his memories had led me to lower the walls I usually kept up where regular Eric was concerned. I started to trust him – even after I had seen him drain my fairy godmother Claudine. And when I saw how vulnerable he was after his day in the sun, how depressed he was at having lost sunshine again after having gone without it for a 1,000 years, it made me see him differently. He just seemed so…_human_ to me.

And so obviously shocked by what I told him about himself. The first few days he was with me, I had enjoyed pointing out what a total jerk I thought Eric Northman normally was. But each time I had said something nasty about him, I had seen the way it jolted and embarrassed this "new" Eric. After a while, I started to feel like I was just being…well, _mean._ I know it sounds ridiculous to think that anyone could be "mean" to Eric Northman and have it make an impact, but I swear, I kept seeing him flinch and become more deflated with every offensive comment I made about him. By the time he came into my bedroom saying he'd had a bad dream about Godric telling him he was evil, I had begun to wonder guiltily if all my picking at him had been the cause of it.

When he and Tara got into it in my living room that next night, with her yelling about all his past crimes and calling me crazy for letting him stay with me, I found myself wanting to soften the truth for him. Not lie to him, because I like to be honest as much as I can, but just not hit him over the head with his sins when he was clearly feeling bad about himself already.

It wasn't like he had asked me to be kind when he'd confronted me after Tara had stormed out; he'd asked what he wanted to know very directly. But I could see by his reactions that what he was hearing from me was making him kind of, well, disgusted with himself.

His face got tighter and more grim as I went on explaining our shared past, and then, the strangest thing happened. He asked me in this clipped voice, "Why are you letting me stay with you?" And when he said it, he said _exactly_ the way the "other" Eric would have, which was the first time I really saw something that made me think that maybe they were still – somehow – _the same person_. Until that moment, I guess I had thought that, somehow, this was a "new" Eric, a stranger who just happened to look like the Sheriff of Area 5, but who had no connection with the vampire I had known.

It shocked me a little, but it also made me think. When Eric had been so depressed after his time in the sun, he had asked me if I preferred "the Eric who doesn't feel." Was _feeling_ what made the two Erics different? Or could it be that snarky, sarcastic Eric was just as emotionally deep inside, but had learned over 1,000 years to hide the feelings this Eric showed so easily?

Just as this thought had occurred to me, Eric pointed out grimly that he was "clearly capable of extreme cruelty," and after a moment to think about what I wanted to say in reply, I had reassured him that while that was true, I had seen a change in him and believed he could be different.

His response was to announce that I had a beautiful light in me (which made me start, since we hadn't yet discussed what "light" meant to a part-fae like me) and that he couldn't bear it if he "snuffed it out." His voice was husky with emotion as he spoke and his eyes regarded me with a sincerity that just about broke my heart. I felt a sudden surge of affection for this confused, conflicted man who was a new Eric but might be a part of the Eric I had always known. I found myself gazing at him with an almost shy astonishment at the depth of my own feelings, when he suddenly stood up … and walked right out my front door without so much as a goodbye.

_Whatthehell?_

I was surprised and then dismayed as I realized he was actually leaving my – well, _his_ home – leaving _me_ – apparently to protect me from _himself._ Rather than continue to stay here where he might be safe, he was willing to venture out into a world where he knew virtually no one else and where a bunch of witches were evidently gunning for him – and all to save me from any threat _he _feared he might pose to me. I felt a tingle of respect that he would make such a (stupid but noble) choice, quickly followed by sorrow that apparently my faith in Eric was stronger than his faith in himself. I realized that I truly did not believe he was any threat to me – _at all_ – and that if he believed himself to be, it was probably because everyone kept reminding him of who was "supposed" to be.

If I had truly hated Eric Northman the way Tara said, I would have been glad to see him walking out my door, even if it was dangerous for him. But the truth was, I didn't want him to go. And while part of me told myself that it was because this Eric was so vulnerable to a world he didn't understand and that he was at risk of getting his vampire ass bewitched or beaten or something, the rest of me knew that it was just because I genuinely cared about him.

And he and his ridiculously long legs were moving at a really good clip down my driveway.

I had ended up dashing out the door, calling to him to wait and then pleading with him to come back inside. He had nearly reached the bend in the path towards the road when he finally hesitated. I saw him turn, almost reluctantly, and I positively _willed_ him to come back to me. When he finally started to move towards me, I had held out my arms in welcome, anxious to hold him, comfort him, and let him know that _I trusted him_.

When he reached the porch, I drew him to me, wrapping my arms around his neck, the height of the steps I stood on making us closer in height than we normally are. And while he had clutched me close and buried one of his huge hands in my hair, he had not been anything but gentle and gentlemanly with me, his hands never straying anywhere "improper" even though I was pressed against him.

The last time I had been in Eric Northman's arms like this, he had been giving me what was unquestionably the hottest kiss of my entire life.

And I realized, as he held me like a piece of china, brushing my back with his fingertips delicately (but with frustratingly _friend-like_ tenderness), that I wanted him to kiss me like that again.

So, I had pressed my lips against his jawline, softly. He had drawn back in surprise, his astonished eyes meeting mine, and I had taken his face between my hands before brushing my lips lightly over his to show him what I wanted. He responded, but unlike the fevered kiss in his office, this time he let me control the movements of our mouths – at least until I made it clear by the way I grabbed at his hair and thrust my tongue in between his lips that I wanted more from him.

Although I had only intended to kiss him, something snapped inside me as he responded and I urged him to come inside the house with me before we ended up having sex right there on the porch in front of God and everybody. We had ended up stumbling, clothes coming off left and right, until we ended up on the couch – the same one where I was now trying fruitlessly to sleep – and Eric had been just about to put his mouth between my thighs where no one else's mouth had ever been when Bill had interrupted us.

As embarrassed as I had been at first about being caught by Bill (of all people!) making out with Eric, I had been livid when Bill hauled Eric off in silver to imprison him. It had made no sense to me that Eric was a danger to anyone in his state – and although I could now understand why Bill had been concerned, it still seemed to me that Bill had been unnecessarily harsh with Eric when he had him in his power.

That Bill had also thrown me out of his house so coldly had also hurt me, but now that I knew what happened after I had gone – that Bill had been about to execute Eric until the Authority had stopped him – I could no longer be surprised. The Bill I thought I knew would never have been so ruthless, but after learning that Bill had sought me out to bring me to his queen, I had to wonder if had ever known the real Bill at all. I wondered what else I didn't know about Bill Compton, and, for that matter, whether I could trust anything he had ever said to me.

Including, now that I thought about, anything he had told me about Eric.

I rolled over on the couch again, deciding that I should think about that some more when my head didn't hurt so much. How much of what I had felt about Eric was based on what Bill had told me about him rather than what I knew for myself?

Just as I was thinking about that, I felt a shift in emotions from Eric _Embarrassment. Annoyance. Grimness. _

I guessed he was probably filling in someone – probably Pam – on what had happened with me. I could also feel a faint echo of something – no, _someone_ – else through my connection with Eric. Whoever it was felt…_smug._ And _relieved._

Great. So not only could I feel Eric's feelings, I could also feel what must be Pam's as well? Not as strongly, that was for sure, but still, a distant little tickle of emotion that was somehow distinct from Eric.

At least Eric's feelings had gone quieter again, as if he was trying to shut them off. Not with a lot of success, though. He was still angry and depressed.

In frustration, I buried my feet under a throw cushion at the other end of the couch, trying to feel more grounded and protected from the darkness.

The night that Bill and his guards had taken Eric, I had tried to think of anyone who could help Eric, but the only thing I thought to do was to call Pam, whose phone went right to voicemail. I had left her a message, but when she didn't call back after several hours, I had finally given up and gone to bed, conscious that I was scheduled to work the next day.

Even though I had spent only a single, chaste night with Eric in my bed by that point, I missed him when I crawled between my sheets late that evening. I had tossed and turned for much of the night, telling myself repeatedly that Eric was going to be _fine, _that Bill wouldn't actually do anything to hurt him. In retrospect, it was a good thing that I hadn't really known at the time what Bill's plans were for Eric or I am sure I would not have gotten any sleep _at all._

The next day had been stressful. First I had gone to work, despite being exhausted and distracted by Eric's situation, only to have Sam up and fire me out of the blue. And then, I had stopped at Jason's house and found him tied up to his bed because he was afraid (wrongly, as it turns out) he was going to turn into a werepanther. The only good thing I could say about the day was that at least I knew nothing was going to happen to Eric while the sun was up, and that keeping busy with Jason kept me from fretting about how helpless I felt about what seemed like my inability to help Eric.

I knew I cared about deeply about Eric, but I hadn't realized how deep my feelings were until I saw him standing in the woods that evening, his blond hair shining like a halo in the moonlight. My heart had welled up with a raw joy when he appeared, and it dimmed only for a moment when I suddenly worried that he might have escaped from his cell and might be on the run. But, almost as if reading my mind (_or my emotions?_) he had reassured me that Bill had set him free willingly. I was confused, but I suddenly realized I didn't even _care_ why Bill had done it – it was enough that he had, that Eric was no longer imprisoned, that he was with me again. That he could _stay_ with me.

And as I looked at him, grinning at me happily from across the glade, I realized that the sudden rush of feeling I was experiencing was love for him. For Eric. I still wasn't sure how I might feel about him once he got his memories back, but in that moment, it just didn't matter. I loved the Eric who was with me, who had been willing to leave me to keep me safe, who wanted to protect me and who I, in turn, wanted to protect.

The sex we had in the woods that night was, like the dream I had first had of Eric, unexpected and surprising. I had always assumed sex with Eric Northman would be technically amazing, based on the number of fangbangers whose lusty thoughts about him had assaulted me every time I entered Fangtasia, and even though we were doing it in the grass beside a lake on a chilly fall night, it _was _every bit as fantastic as I had anticipated _._ But never in a thousand years would I have expected our first time together to be what could only be described as _lovemaking_. Eric had been surprisingly gentle at first, taking care not to rush my body into accommodating his, and he had been devoted to bringing me pleasure. And through it all, I had been able to feel his love for me, and in return, show my love for him.

He also hadn't bit me.

Not once.

And at first I had been tensely waiting for it as he moved his mouth over my body until he finally whispered, "Shhhh, Sookie. I'm not going to hurt you. Ever." And then he had playfully licked at my neck, suckling the skin until it turned me on, but never once sinking his fangs into the pulse that beat beneath his lips.

I didn't know what to think of that. Bill had _always_ bit me during sex, _always._ I thought it was a given in having sex with a vampire. And especially with Eric, since Bill had always told me that feeding on me and fucking me was all Eric Northman wanted from me. That Eric hadn't even _suggested_ that he be allowed to bite me…well, I just didn't get it.

And the rest of the sex…well, it was everything I had ever imagined it would be, and more. Eric might not have been able to remember anything about who he was before the witches had cursed him, but he sure hadn't forgotten how to touch a woman. By the time I had heard the snarly, tangled thoughts of Alcide and Debbie nearby in the woods, I hadn't even _cared_ if the two weres could see what Eric and I were doing. I was just beyond shame at that point.

And now, remembering sex with Eric was turning me on. I sighed and rolled over, pressing my thighs together tightly, as if that would distract my body from where my mind had gone.

I knew that Eric could feel what I was feeling. I knew because I was suddenly hit with a positively mean-spirited rush of raw, primal lust that made me start to tremble with desire in the dark. It blasted through me like a storm, making my skin tingle and my heart begin to pound like a jackhammer.

And then, just as suddenly as it had started, it stopped and I felt nothing but coldness.

Well, fuck.

I normally don't curse much, but being hit by an emotional freight train like that so unexpectedly was one reason I was so upset with Eric. If he really did love me, how could he not have warned me about what would happen if we exchanged blood? And now he was deliberately screwing with my emotions just because he was feeling hurt and angry? Well, screw him.

I angrily got up from the couch and went into the bathroom to find something for my aching head. Maybe it would make the ache in my heart go away, too.

After I had swallowed some over-the-counter pain pills, I brought the glass of water I had used in the bathroom back to the living room and put it on the coffee table before I crawled back under the afghan.

If I had been falling for him the night we first made love, it was a done deal after we went through the day of the sun spell together. It had just about killed me to see him suffering under the weight of silver I had had to use to keep him safe, but when I realized how close we had come to his actually walking out into the sunlight and dying, it had been worth it because I knew without a doubt: _I loved Eric Northman._ And losing him would have been just too much for me to bear.

When I had offered him my blood to heal from the silver, it had been the most natural thing in the world. He had not once asked to have my blood in all the days we were together, and even when he did finally take my blood in order to heal, he had taken only the most careful, small sip. When he had bit his hand and offered his own blood to me, I had been confused and startled, but never once was I _suspicious_. Eric had demonstrated his love for me repeatedly the last few days and we had built up a deep well of trust between us. I truly believed he had nothing but my best interests at heart.

Even when things became surreal after we had exchanged blood, I had trusted him. I figured it was just an unusually vivid V high, probably because Eric's blood was so old. The things we experienced together in our little bubble of bliss were astonishing…spiritual-feeling, even. We had made love over and over again in our magical little grotto and when the effects of the blood exchange finally began to fade, I had fallen asleep entwined with him, happy and completely satisfied.

Of course, now I couldn't believe I had been so naïve, so completely lacking in basic common sense.

That night, I had woken up in the bed we had shared and realized he was gone. At first I had panicked, especially when I saw the front door standing wide open, but then I had realized I could _feel_ him. And that sense of _Where's Eric_ had drawn me like a magnet to the trailer that lay to the west between Bon Temps and Shreveport, where I discovered that that evil witch bitch Marnie had him.

I was grateful for being able to find him, don't get me wrong. I had fallen completely in love with the Eric I had come to know over the last few days and I really wanted – _needed _– to find him when he went missing.

But being able to find him like _that_? Like a vampire can find anyone who has had the vampire's blood? It freaked me out because _nothing_ had prepared me for that. I had had a _lot _of Bill's blood in the past, but it had never left me able to track him or feel anything from him. When I first realized that I could locate Eric, I didn't know if it was because Eric's blood was so old or whether it had something to do with our having exchanged blood, but whatever it was, Eric _hadn't warned me. _

That had pissed me off. And scared me. Even as I was still doing my best to rescue Eric from the control of the witches, I was wondering if I had made a terrible mistake in trusting the more harmless-seeming version of him. Maybe even seemingly sweet Eric had a deep-rooted manipulative streak that was just, well, part of who the _real Eric was._

As soon as the immediate crisis of what had gone down at the tolerance rally had been resolved, I had wanted to talk to Eric to find out the truth, to know if he had understood what he was doing when we exchanged blood. I had lain on the couch, cycling between my feelings of love for him and my anger and suspicion that he might have deliberately manipulated me, completely torn about my feelings.

And what had I found out when he finally arrived?

That the bond did more than just let me know where he was and let me feel his feelings. _Way more. _As soon as we had touched, all the questions I had had had melted away like the snowflakes in sunshine and I had been positively dizzy with love and longing to just be close to him. I had wanted to just snuggle against his chest and just let the doubts I'd had float away like nothing. Touching Eric had become like a drug. An amazing, addicting, mind-altering drug.

But Gran raised me to be a strong woman, like I've said before, and although it was tough, I resisted that seductive feeling and stepped away from him. It made my mind clear, which just made me that much more sure that whatever this bond was, if it made me not want to think, it had to be a bad thing. Didn't it?

And had he done this probably-bad-thing to me deliberately?

Why, yes. Yes, he had. He openly admitted that even without his memories, he had known we would have some kind of permanent bond when he gave me his blood. And while he said he didn't know all the details of what effects it would have, he had known that we would be "One" and that he had wanted that for us. But had he told me what was going to happen? No. No, he damn well _had not._

After all the things that Bill had "neglected" to tell me – that he had been sent to procure me for his queen, Sophie-Anne; that taking his blood would make me be attracted to him; that he had let me get _beaten up_ in order to get that blood inside me – I had become wary of what _any _vampire's agenda was where I was concerned.

Or at least I was until I looked into Eric's innocent-looking blue eyes and he offered me his blood. Instead of questioning why he would do that, I had barely hesitated before latching onto his hand like a baby on her mama's breast, all caught up by his sweet, guileless expression and my feelings for him.

What a fucking idiot I was.

Especially for having given him my heart. I wish I could have said that what had happened between us these last few days had just been a physical thing – Sookie Stackhouse gets laid by an expert, breaks orgasm record, news at 11! – but the truth was that I had fallen – _hard_ – for the sweet-natured Eric who had taken shelter with me. I had loved him with my whole heart by the end of our time together. And he had just broken that heart by not being honest with me.

Now, as I lay there in the dark, feeling stupid and hurt, I could finally feel my headache starting to ease, driven away by the drugs. And far away in Shreveport, I knew it must be nearly dawn because I could feel that Eric was finally going into his day sleep. The connection between us grew quiet and that was what finally let me start to drift off.

And when I finally fell asleep, I dreamed that I was flying through the sky in daylight, trying to find Eric and my heart that he had taken with him. But this time, the bond had no pull and as I circled aimlessly over the streets in Shreveport in ever-increasing frustration, I felt like my heart and Eric had both flown away for good.

**A/N: Well, **_**that**_** turned out to be a lot longer chapter than I ever intended for the first one in this story! But Sookie just had to tell me all about her view of what had gone down in the previous two stories to explain her feelings about Eric. Hopefully now that we are all caught up, I can write a little more quickly and with more action and less brooding. Special shout outs to my regular readers who have asked so nicely how the story was going the last few weeks and encouraged me to post SOON, and to treewitch703 and eys1214, who let me bounce around some ideas for this story with them and gave me helpful feedback. XOXOXOX to you all! This story will bounce between Eric and Sookie's points of view, so if you are missing being inside Eric's head, don't worry – it will come. **


	2. Chapter 2: Girl Talk

**Chapter 2: Girl Talk**

Sookie

The ring of my phone woke me up a little after 1 p.m. I grimaced at the sunlight streaming in through the windows as I fumbled for the phone.

"Hel—hello," I mumbled, covering my eyes against the light. Even for a sun-lover like me, it was a bit much after such a restless night.

"Hey, Sookie." Sam sounded surprisingly friendly for a man who had fired me a few days before. "Listen…I know that something must be up for you to not be showing up to work without callin', but we are really going to need your help tomorrow night with it being Halloween an' all. Any chance you can come in for the late shift?"

I blinked. "Sam, you fired me the last time you saw me. You don't remember that?"

There was a long silence on the other of the line before Sam replied, his voice awkward. "Uh, Sookie, I'm sorry, I was…not myself when I did that. Can you forget I ever said anything like that? And come in? Please?"

"Well, I hadn't exactly run out and got another job yet, so…sure. Happy to come in. Do you need me today, too?" I had been too caught up in the drama of the witch attacks to even think through what I was going to do once Eric was gone and I still had no job to go to. This wasn't the kind of economy to be looking for work in. I was suddenly tremendously grateful to Sam for giving me a second chance. And even wondered guiltily if maybe I shouldn't try to prioritize work a little more since he did have a point when he had snapped at me just before he let me go about how often outside crises interfered with my job.

"Nah, we're fine for tonight. But tomorrow for sure, Sook." There was another pause and then Sam asked quietly, "Everything okay with you? I mean, besides that you have an asshole boss who could fire you and then forget he did it?"

I sighed. "Honestly, Sam, there's been some drama the last couple of days…but I think it's done for now."

Well, except for Tara having killed the national AVL rep as well as a Louisiana vamp sheriff and ending up hauled off with the other Shreveport witches to the vampire Authority to be dealt with.

I shivered; I knew about vampire "justice" from both Bill and Eric. I know Eric had said that Tara had "killed the right vampire" to get at least a show of a fair trial, but I also suspected that she wasn't going to entirely escape punishment after killing someone so high up in the ranks of vampire importance as Nan Flanagan. And while she may have killed the AVL spokeswoman for my sake, the death of that vampire sheriff had been a truly senseless murder in my mind. I had no idea Tara's hatred for vampires had gotten so deep that she was capable of something so cold-blooded.

Despite my misgivings about what Tara had done, since she had killed Miss Flanagan to prevent the vampires from finding out I was a half-fairy, I felt that I owed my old friend whatever help I could give her. But what exactly that was, I didn't know yet. The only obvious possibilities were my connections with Bill and Eric, and I wasn't exactly popular with either of them at the moment.

For the first time in a long while, I felt truly helpless.

"Your drama didn't have anything to do with that anti-vampire terror attack in Shreveport last night, did it?" Sam asked warily. "I saw something about it on the news, but they didn't reveal too much beyond that a couple of vampires were killed by vampire haters and they weren't giving out any names. Shocking to see that kind of thing so close to home, but I guess there is always somebody who wants to hurt those different from them."

Shit. If I told him that Tara was one of the "vampire haters," he would definitely want to try to do something to help her. But what could he do that wouldn't get him in deep trouble with the vampires himself since she had been taken by the vampire Authority? It was better if he didn't know exactly what was going on for now, for his own sake.

"Yeah, some of it was to do with that," I finally confessed. "But like I said, as far as I know, it's all under control. Don't you worry about it."

"Well, you know, if you need anything, Sookie, you just let me know." Sam said. "I'll see you tomorrow night."

After I hung up with Sam, I thought about lying down again since I wasn't exactly well rested, but it had already gotten pretty late and I had a lot of work to get done around the house before night fell again. I wasn't going to spend another night on the couch if I could help it, which meant I had to get up and start stripping beds and doing laundry.

As I rolled up into a sitting position, I cautiously "felt" for Eric. That he was in his daytime rest was clear from the muted signal from our bond. It wasn't entirely gone, though; instead it felt like a quiet little hum that was still identifiable to me as being from _him._

The very _Ericness _of the feeling suddenly made me miss him with a raw and tender ache somewhere in my chest. Even in his rest, Eric must have felt it because I felt a tiny little quiver through the bond, like someone had plucked a taut string and sent a pulse of energy first one way and then the other on it. Before Eric could fully rouse to the feeling, I hastily started to focus on the practicalities of my day in the hopes of shutting down my own emotions. Nothing like thinking about how badly you have to pee to break any mood.

It must have worked because that little reactive ripple from Eric moved through me and then faded. I sat very still for a moment, thinking –well, _feeling _– nothing. When I was sure Eric had slipped back into unawareness, I let the breath I had been holding out with a sigh and I headed for the bathroom to take care of business.

**~*E&S*~**

For someone who was feeling like a zombie after my nearly sleepless night, I got a lot done. I'd showered (despite feeling a quickly smothered pang of nostalgia for Eric when I'd stepped nude into the tub), stripped the beds, run the laundry, and packed up what remained of Eric's "local yokel" clothes into a box, although I suspected he'd never wear any of them again.

After a run to the grocery for some fresh food supplies, I cooked myself a healthy dinner (a chicken breast, a microwaved potato using the big, fancy microwave Eric had given me, and some frozen broccoli), then sat and enjoyed half a pumpkin spice muffin they'd had in the little fresh baked area at the store.

As it drew near to dark, I found myself nervously waiting for the influx of feelings I expected when Eric woke up for the night. I was standing at the sink, doing my couple of dinner dishes, when I finally felt the connection with him surge into life. I paused, the sponge in my hand, as _disorientation_ turned to _depression._ I felt him probe my own emotions and consciously focused on resuming the methodical scrubbing of the dish in my hand. _Neutral. Neutral. Neutral. _

No sense in both of us being miserable, right?

After a while (about the time I was settling onto the couch with the remote to watch the TV) I felt Eric's feelings shift again. _Resolution._ And there it stayed. He had evidently made up his mind to do something and he seemed set on _getting it done_.

I flipped around the channels to see what was on, finally picking a reality show instead of the endless Halloween-themed programs on at this time of the year. I pulled the afghan I had slept under the night before up over myself again and found myself toying with its squares, slipping the tips of my fingers into the holes of the crochet pattern and flicking them out again absent-mindedly.

The show's stars were shopping in a New York store when I started to feel someone was coming. It was confusing at first, as I knew I could feel Eric, but also someone else heading towards me. The second person's feelings were a wispy signal, echoing and indistinct. Most of what I sensed was…_boredom._ With _anxiety_ and _relief _alternating in tenuous little currents.

My best guess was that I was feeling Pam. Not nearly so strong as I felt Eric's emotions, but more like a watery reflection of what I guessed he felt with his progeny.

Eric's feelings were coming through nice and strong, though.

_Resigned_. _Doubtful._ Occasional little flickers of _longing_, quickly suppressed.

If he had Pam with him, I was guessing this impending visit was business rather than something more personal. With a little spark of hope, I wondered if Eric might have thought of something I could do to help Tara. Maybe he wanted to take me to with him and Pam to wherever the Authority were holding her? Goodness knows, Eric had come up with creative solutions to seemingly impossible problems in the past, so it was possible.

I twisted the wool of my gran's afghan between my fingers absently. I hated to admit it, but if you thought objectively about his plan to use my blood in order to trick Russell Edgington into walking into the sunlight, it was very clever – at least, if you ruled out the whole crazy-dangerous, suicidal part where Eric burned up, too.

And while I sure wasn't thrilled to be nearly drained in the process, a part of me now wondered if Eric would really have let that happen. As I thought back to it, while Russell drank my blood with blatant greed, Eric hadn't spent that long at my neck. Longer than the few seconds he did when we exchanged blood, for sure, but not that long, not really, especially if my blood was as delectable as Russell claimed it was.

As I pictured it in my mind again, I suddenly remembered Eric's huge hand stroking my hair as he drank from me. At the time, I had been so panicked by what was happening that I couldn't process it, but now I could reimagine the rhythmic movement of his fingers brushing against my head.

Jesus, had he been trying to _comfort_ me?

My heart skipped a beat at the thought that even then, maybe there had been a little bit of "my" Eric in him.

And when I had offered him blood to heal his burns afterwards, I remembered that, despite drinking steadily at my wrist, he had let it go easily and wiped his mouth daintily after taking only as much blood as Bill would allow.

I frowned thinking back to that now. When a bloodied and tortured Bill had awakened in the back of Alcide's van, he had attacked me like a wild animal, savaging me with his fangs and draining me until I was near death. He had claimed later that his vampire instincts had taken over and he'd been unable to restrain himself as he fought for his survival. He had also hinted darkly many times afterwards that if he, the vampire who loved me, could not control himself in drinking my blood, what could I expect of an ancient, selfish monster like Eric Northman who only wanted to fuck and feed on me? Believing Bill's explanations of vampire nature, I had been left with a genuine terror that if the regular Eric were ever to bite me, I'd be drained in a heartbeat.

But as I thought back to what had actually happened with Russell Edgington, it struck me: _Eric had never lost control with me._ Yes, he had bit me and drank from me, but he'd been far most disciplined about it than Russell had.

How was that even possible? Even Eric had told me that I would be extremely alluring to most vampires, that I smelled like "sunshine in a pretty blond bottle." And yet, he'd seemed to have no trouble restraining himself while tasting my blood, even before he'd lost his memories. Was that self-control the result of his age or some more personal part of his character?

I had come to trust the "new" Eric with my blood, but now I wondered if I could have trusted the "other" Eric with it as well. At least as far as _how much_ he drank from me; obviously, I was still worrying about what Eric may have done with the relatively tiny bit of my blood he had had to make the bond between us. Did the possibility that Eric might never have intended to kill me with Russell mean that things might not be as they seemed this time either?

I had been so lost in memories that it took me a moment to realize that Eric had stopped moving, but Pam was still heading in my direction.

I felt a pang of disappointment, which I quickly curbed. I had asked Eric to give me time away from him and he was obviously trying to comply with my request. It was hypocritical to feel unhappy about it, right? Especially since I had just been sitting here mulling over whether he had really intended to kill me the first time he'd had my blood.

I tried to focus back on my television, where a designer was having some kind of emotional breakdown as he talked directly to the camera. As I felt Eric's continued physical stillness, I couldn't help myself; I tentatively dipped into his emotions, a little nervous about what I would find.

I backed out hastily when I realized that he was missing me, and was closer than I had realized, certainly no more than a half a mile or so away.

Just then there was a sharp rap on the front door. Pushing away the afghan, I went to the door and peered through the glass before opening it, just in case all these crazy feelings I'd been having were wrong.

No such luck.

As I had suspected, Pam stood on my porch, dressed in a sumptuous russet velvet pantsuit with what looked like acorn buttons.

"Hey, Pam," I said coolly as I opened the door to Eric's progeny. I looked the outfit up and down. While not exactly something I would wear, it definitely screamed "autumn" to me. "Getting into the spirit of the season, I see."

Pam smiled tightly at me, keeping her lips pressed together. If I didn't know better, I might have accepted that smile at face value and thought she was glad to see me. (Or at least as glad as Pam ever was about anything.)

But I could also sense what Pam's real feelings were behind that smile. Echoing and faint, granted, but distinctly _her _feelings.

Pam hated my fucking guts.

I blinked in surprise. I had known I wasn't Pam's favorite person, but I hadn't realized how deep her antipathy for me went.

"Sookie." Pam thrust her beautifully manicured hand, holding a heavy envelope, towards me. "I come bearing presents."

Baffled and still a little disconcerted by the disconnect between Pam's calm appearance and her more turbulent inner emotions, I accepted the envelope. "What is it?" The envelope wasn't sealed, so I peeked inside, where I could see a cashier's check made out to me as well as a multipage document still folded in thirds.

"Your pay for…_services rendered_ to Eric. As we agreed." There was something in the way Pam drawled "services rendered" that told me she was well aware of what kind of "services" Eric and I had "rendered" to each other the last few days were together.

I ignored the innuendo and pulled out the check, my eyes going first to what was not Eric's signature but must have been a bank officer's and only then to the amount. "What the _fuck_, Pam? How much did he pay for my house?" The agreement between Pam and me had been for the price of my house plus the cost of the renovations so that I could pay Eric back in full for the property, fair and square. Unless he had included gold-plated bathroom fixtures somewhere and I hadn't noticed them yet, this was way too much money.

An elegant shoulder shrugged. "That includes the original payment amount, the renovation costs, and then a little something on top to cover the inconvenience of having his company for so many days."

"It's too much," I answered flatly.

"No, it is a fair amount for what we agreed to," Pam said equally flatly. "Now the _other gift_ _IS _too much. In my opinion." She pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow.

With a frown, I pulled out the sheaf of papers in the envelope and began to flip through them. I got to the final page, which asked for my signature below Eric's, before looking up at Pam in confusion. "So, what, he wants me to sign the paperwork for the house before I even give him the money back?"

Pam's eyes rolled skyward. "No, Sookie, he is giving you the house _and_ the money. They are both yours to keep, fairy princess. Signed, sealed and delivered, no strings attached." I could feel through our shadowy, indirect connection that she was telling me the truth.

"Did he say why?" I asked after a moment.

For a moment, Pam's feigned indifference slipped and her dislike for me was naked on her face. "If you don't know _why_, then you're a bigger fool than I imagined, Sookie Stackhouse. And I think you are _quite_ the fucking fool." She snapped open the small clutch she had tucked under her arm and produced a pen. "Now, would you sign that goddamn paperwork, please? Eric and I have to be hitting the road or we're not going to get to –" She stopped herself, as if suddenly aware she might be revealing too much. " – to where we're heading tonight."

"Tara's trial?" I asked.

"Vampire business is all you need to know," Pam replied, thrusting the pen at me more assertively through the doorway. "And you're holding it up."

I stepped out onto the porch in order to use the arm of the porch swing as a flat surface for my signature. As I held the papers out to her, I couldn't help but ask, rather plaintively, "So, Eric isn't planning on taking me along to see if I could maybe help do something for Tara, then? I'd kind of hoped he'd had a brainstorm and that might be why he's sitting half a mile down the road from us right now."

Pam made a noise of exasperation at me and I could faintly feel her disdain. "Let me get this straight. Your obnoxious twat of a friend _killed_ the fucking _head of the American Vampire League_ in order to _keep you_ from falling into the hands of the Authority. But _you _think it would be a _good idea_ to head straight to them on your own? If you and Eric truly are now One, _no wonder_ he is a fucked up mess." She shook her head as if she couldn't grasp the depth of my idiocy. "Honestly, I don't know which of you two fucking morons is more stupid: your friend for killing Nan Flanagan to save your half-fairy ass or you for wanting to make what she did was _utterly fucking pointless_." Pushing a copy of the paperwork into her purse and handing a set back to me, Pam turned to walk away.

"Pam!" I said as she reached the bottom of my front steps. She stopped and looked back at me. "Eric – is he … okay?" One thing I was learning quickly from the bond was that being able to feel someone's emotions and understanding how to interpret them were very different things.

"Are you not paying _any_ attention to the feelings I'm sure you're feeling through your bond, Sookie?" Pam snarled. "No, he is not fucking '_okay_.' He's not only pining for you the way he did when you were gone with the fairies, but whatever happened to him under that spell –" She shook her head with frustration. "He's different now. Something changed in him, and you – somehow you and that fucking _blóðfesta_ – _broke_ the vampire I have known for a century." Her eyes bored into me, filled with a cold rage. "And it's probably going to get him _killed._ Not that _you_ care about _that_, you _ungrateful, blind, _half-human piece of–"

Pam suddenly stopped her tirade, throwing up her hand and closing her eyes as if to regain control of herself. "Personally, I hope you find a way to break the bond between you, Sookie," she began again, her voice tight and flat. "Because the only thing keeping me from ripping your goddamn fool head off right now is the _respect_ I have for Eric's blood flowing in your veins. But be warned, fairy princess—" I could feel the hate-filled solemnity of what Pam was about to say. "If my Maker _dies _because of you…my respect for _his blood_ is going to demand that I rip you apart _piece by piece_ for being _unworthy_ of it."

Geez. Good to know where I stood where Pam was concerned.

"Well, then it's a good thing he gave me back the house so you can't just waltz in and do that," I finally said, my voice steady. "You should go. He's getting impatient and he can tell we've been…talking." I'd been feeling Eric's concern escalating along with Pam's increasing anger at me and I knew he was struggling with whether or not to come investigate.

Without another word, Pam vamp-sped off into the night. I went back into what was once again _my_ house, flipped the lock and then dropped back onto the couch to finish watching my program.

Eric

Pam appeared out of the darkness, looking as calm and collected as ever. "Mission accomplished," she said as she slipped into the car. "She took the check and signed the paperwork for the house. Now you can quit worrying about other vampires being able to get to her while you're gone."

"What the fuck just happened between you, Pam?" I asked. I had felt my child's hatred towards _min __blóð__frig _spiral up while she was with Sookie, and in turn had felt Sookie's increasing tension. If Sookie had actually become frightened, I would have fucked the request she'd made of me to keep my distance and been there in a flash, even if it was to protect her from my own progeny. But evidently things hadn't escalated to that level.

Pam crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Nothing. We were just having a little … _girl talk_," she replied, bored as ever. "If we're going to get to New Orleans before dawn, we better get a move on, don't you think?"

I studied my progeny but she simply turned her head and stared out the window. Finally, shaking my head, I turned the ignition over and pulled the car out onto the dark country road where I had been parked for the past several minutes. We had business to attend to and I had made a resolution that I wasn't going to let…_personal issues_…distract me. I may be miserable at the moment, but not so miserable that I wanted to die, and any close dealings with the Authority made that a very real possibility. I was going to do my best to see that Pam and I came out of the next few nights alive.

**A/N: I don't mean to make Sookie a total asshole about Tara's situation, but I really don't think she has a lot of choice at this point to intervene. Even if she were to rescue Tara in the immediate sense of getting her away from the Authority, what is she going to do, hide her forever? Because I think the vampires are going to have a long memory for Nan's death. No, it's better for Sookie to let vampire justice take its course, even though it is hard for her. **

**And just a reminder: I'll be including both Eric's and Sookie's POV in this once, so if you have missed being inside our Viking's head, rest assured, you'll be spending some time there soon! **

**Thanks for all the favorites and reviews on the first chapter of this last part of my Eric and Sookie epic. The support for my take on the characters has just been awesome! Thank you all! XOXOXOXO And happy Thanksgiving to my Canadian friends! **


	3. Chapter 3: Into the Maw of the Authority

**Chapter 3: Into the Maw of the Authority**

Eric

I kept control of my emotions until I felt Sookie fall asleep, a little more than an hour after Pam and I left what was now once again Sookie's house.

It wasn't that I was protecting Sookie from my feelings. I'd been privy to her emotional states since she'd first had my blood in Dallas and I knew that she'd had plenty of experience with extreme emotions, both good and bad. Nothing I felt wasn't anything she hadn't felt herself in the time I'd known her and I knew she was strong enough to handle my bad feelings without them hurting her.

However, I _was_ protecting _myself_ from the humiliation of having her know how painful her rejection of me had been. For a thousand years, I had learned to keep my emotions deeply hidden from everyone I encountered – Godric, my sister Nora, Pam – maybe even from myself. But now they were on full display to Sookie, whether I wanted them to be or not. It was mortifying to have her feel how depressed and helpless she had left me.

The irony that _I_ had been the one who made it possible for her to feel what I now wanted to hide from her was not lost on me.

"_If she feels how much I love her, she'll trust me…If we're One, having Sookie inside me will help me change…If we're bonded, we can overcome everything." _

What.

A.

Fucking.

Idiot.

And I couldn't even blame the amnesiac vampire who had taken over my life for a few days because _I _was the fucking idiot. _Tabula rasa Eric _was_ me._ Not all of me, and definitely a part of me that had not seen the light of day since – well, since I could actually _be_ in daylight without turning into a pile of ash – but undeniably _me_.

And while I knew Sookie loved that part of me, the rest of me felt shut out and stupid.

"She was hoping you might actually want to _take_ her to the Authority," Pam said suddenly. "After all the shit her friend put herself into in order to _stop_ that from happening, she was actually asking me if you had thought of a plan to rescue her friend and whether or not she should come along." Pam snorted.

I glanced sideways at my progeny and raised an eyebrow. "And your point in telling me this now is?"

Pam pursed her lips. "Well, if anyone should be feeling foolish, it should be _Sookie._ Not _you._" She shot a look at me from under her thick false eyelashes.

Trust _min __blóð__frig_ to want to save her childhood friend despite the betrayal of Tara having led the witches to me. Sookie was truly loyal to those she loved to the point of it being a fault.

_Except to me. _

I pushed the self-pitying thought aside and considered whether or not I could do anything to save Tara's life when she went before the Authority. Whether I _should_ do anything to help Tara was a whole other question. Lafayette's cousin had led Marnie Stonebrook right to Sookie's doorstep to take me; she had kidnapped my progeny as well, and the witches had used their control over the two of us to try to kill innocent humans.

If it were up to me, Tara Thornton would be dead for these actions. It would be justice.

On the other hand, she had ended Nan Flanagan for Sookie's sake, to try to prevent the Authority from taking _min __blóð__frig. _ I doubt that Tara even understood herself how important it was to keep Sookie and her fae heritage a secret from the Authority. If they knew that fae existed and that the rumors about fae blood were true, protecting Sookie would be _challenging_ at best.

No, I owed Tara Thornton for trying to protect what was _mine_.

I did have the advantage of being related to a Chancellor, but whether or not I could count on my sister's assistance in this was uncertain. Our personal loyalties would no doubt be competing, as I expected any member of the Authority to want justice for Nan Flanagan's death. And one of the main differences between myself and my younger sibling was that she really believed in all that Authority crap.

"_Fuck._ Eric, please tell me you aren't even considering trying to help that miserable bitch," Pam protested, her eyes not having left me after her unanswered jibe about Sookie. "She led those fucking witches right to both of us and then used us as goddamn weapons at that idiotic tolerance rally. She should be dead already and would be if you hadn't commanded me not to kill her." My progeny was almost sputtering in her bitterness.

"If I see an opportunity to get her out of this alive, I'll take it," I finally said. "She was trying to protect Sookie and I owe her for that."

I could feel Pamela's fury and frustration, so I wasn't surprised when, after a few moments of trying to hold her feelings in, she blurted, "So, this obsession with Sookie isn't over even though you gave her the house back and she wants nothing to do with you?"

My jaw tightened. "Pam, the _blóðfesta_ –"

"Oh, _fuck_ the _blóðfesta_!" Pam spit. "Eric, you _have_ to find a way to break that goddamn fucking bond with her. It is going to _kill you_ if you don't. And if she doesn't want it, it is _pointless_ to have it."

My fingers tightened on the steering wheel and I focused on the road in front of me. Pam wasn't saying anything I hadn't thought myself since Sookie had told me how unhappy she was about the bond.

"I don't know if it _can_ be broken," I finally said. "But if it turns out that she really does not want it – after she's had a few days to think about it –" My mouth was dry as I dragged out the words. "—I'll see if it can be broken." The very idea made my heart clench.

Beside me, Pam's entire body relaxed. "Good," she murmured. "Because I want the old Eric back."

I sighed, but I did not reply. Even if I broke the bond with Sookie, I wasn't sure that I could promise Pam that she would get 'the old Eric back.' As bitter as I felt at the moment about how my bonding with Sookie seemed to have imploded, I still knew this: I wanted to become something more than I had been for the last thousand years. A new Eric, if you will. With or without Sookie to support me in that. I owed it to myself.

**~*E&S*~**

We arrived in New Orleans in the middle of the night and by 3 a.m. had checked into L'Estate, one of the premiere vampire hotels in the French Quarter. As soon as Pam and I had settled into our connecting rooms, I called the number I had been given the night before to contact the Authority once we had arrived. A perky female voice informed me that a vehicle would come for us at 4 a.m. and we would be transported to an undisclosed location. When I asked if we should bring our luggage with us, the voice was vague, assuring me that if we needed it, someone else would retrieve it for us.

Fucking Authority and their secrecy protocols. Even with my "close connection" to the organization, I didn't know whether the vehicle would take us to the airport for a flight to another location or whether we would remain in New Orleans.

I ordered in room service with donors for Pam and myself in order to make sure we were well fed before what was to come.

I also made a more personal call to the Authority.

"You simply _cannot_ stay out of trouble, can you?" was the greeting my sister gave me when she answered her phone, her playful tone undercut with genuine annoyance. "I understand you and your progeny are arriving tonight for the trial, so I'll be seeing you soon." Her cool British voice dropped to a whisper. "And when I do see you, I want to know the _real_ story of what happened last night, not the bullshit version I heard from Nan's guards."

"I'll tell you everything," I answered calmly. _Except about Sookie_; that secret was not one to be shared even with my sister if I could avoid it. "How much trouble am I in?" I asked briskly.

"At the moment, not so very much, although the Guardian is understandably _concerned_ about how Nan ended up a pile of goo while in your area. Especially given the disappearance of the Magister last year _in the same city_," Nora said pointedly. "They're going to want to understand how necromancers were allowed to take you and your progeny and how one of the witches still managed to kill Nan Flanagan after the others were captured."

No questions about Louisiana's telepath? I didn't know yet whether Nora was just withholding that part or whether Sookie was genuinely not on the Authority's radar.

I certainly wasn't going to ask for fear the very question could bring her to their notice.

"Is Compton there?" I asked.

"Already making the acquaintance of one of our female chancellors, yes," Nora said drily. "He seems every bit as ambitious as you have claimed in the past, although somewhat more charming than you described." There was a brief pause. "And a bit shorter than I had imagined."

I snorted.

"So, what do I need to know before we arrive?" I asked.

"You won't have phone service while here," Nora replied. "So, if you have any calls to make, make them before the car arrives to pick you up." Her voice was hushed when she spoke again, "And, Eric – we will be meeting for the first time. No one here knows of our connection. I'd like to keep it that way."

That had been our agreement ever since Nora had joined the Authority, so this was nothing new, but that she was reminding me emphasized the point. It was a safety precaution for both of us – Nora's role as a Chancellor not only put her at risk for enemies, but her loved ones as well. I took it as a sign of her affection for me that she did not want to put a target on my back by making our relationship known. In turn, I could not be used as a pawn against her if no one knew of my status as her brother.

"Understood," I replied evenly.

After we had ended the call, I sat and looked at my phone. With no service in the Authority headquarters, I would be unable to call Sookie even if I felt anything from her that concerned me.

I ended up making one more call.

**~*E&S*~**

The cadre of troops that showed up to escort Pam and me to Authority headquarters were not as discreet as I would have expected. While they were not armed and did not treat us as prisoners, there was still no mistaking them for anything but the paramilitary guards they were.

On the other hand, as they led Pam and me out of L'Estate, it provoked no curious glances from either staff or other guests, which led me to assume that the Authority frequently "retrieved" guests in this way here. Since Pam and I had been instructed about which hotel to go to, I concluded that L'Estate was a regular rendezvous point for Authority "guests."

We were put in an armored SUV with darkened windows and then handed what humans would have called "sleep masks" to cover our eyes. Pam shot me a bemused glance, but I could feel her trepidation. Apparently, we were not to know where we were going. At least that ruled out the airport; I assumed they wouldn't bother with such cloak and dagger measures unless we were ending up somewhere close by.

The silent ride was nearly an hour long, but I could tell by the way the vehicle moved that at least some of that time was spent traveling in what was essentially a large circle and doubling back once or twice, so I thought we were still in the vicinity of New Orleans. When we finally stopped and were told we could remove the masks, Pam and I found ourselves outside a dilapidated, abandoned-looking factory building.

I raised an eyebrow at Pam, who looked worried as she studied the broken windows and debris. It certainly wasn't impressive-looking from the outside.

Inside turned out to be quite another matter.

We had entered a freight elevator, gone down only a couple of floors, crossed a dingy cement floor to another – much nicer – elevator and then continued downwards. It opened on a tastefully decorated reception area that might have been located in any high-powered corporation in the world. A glossy, carefully made up young blonde vampire was behind the desk and greeted us with a fangless smile.

"The Northman party," one of the guards with us announced.

"Ah, yes," the pretty receptionist cooed. "Chancellor Gainsborough asked to be contacted when you arrived." She spoke into her headset and then addressed herself to us again. "If you'd care for a refreshment while waiting, we can get you warmed TruBlood."

Pam rolled her eyes in disgust and muttered, "Thanks but no thanks."

"I'm good, thanks," I replied. I had seriously considered whether or not I should accept the blood; depending on what happened over the next few hours, I wasn't sure whether we were going to be able to feed here and I wanted to be at optimum physical strength. On the other hand, it wouldn't have surprised me if any blood offered had a little "something extra" in it. I decided to err on the side of caution until I had a better sense of what we could expect here in the maw of the Authority.

"Sheriff Northman and Miss de Beaufort, I presume?" said a familiar voice. Pam took in the petite brunette with the porcelain skin and strawberry-pout mouth and I felt a little tingle of sexual interest from my child. There was no denying that my sister was an extremely pretty woman, something I had personally "appreciated" many times over the centuries since Godric had turned her. "I'm Chancellor Gainsborough." She nodded at us politely in the vampire way of greeting. She gestured to a taller woman beside her, whose dark beauty spoke of a Middle Eastern heritage of some kind. "This is Chancellor Kader – our new Magister."

Not only was Chancellor Kader stunningly beautiful, she was ancient. Older than I was, I was certain. I bowed respectfully. "Chancellors."

"Thank you for agreeing to attend the trial of Miss Flanagan's accused killer," Chancellor Kader said in a honey-rich voice. "It is obviously a politically sensitive case due to her prominence in the global media. We want to be sure it is handled…appropriately."

"Of course," I replied neutrally. "We hope our testimony is helpful in determining the appropriate response."

Nora tucked a shiny lock of hair behind her ear. "The trial will not begin until this evening, but we have made arrangements for you to remain here for the duration. It will be more convenient for both of you not to have to travel back and forth to your hotel during the judicial process."

Pam tensed beside me but I sent her an emotional wave of calm. I had expected this. I wasn't thrilled with it, but it didn't surprise me. The kind of accommodations we rated would tell us more about our status here than the fact that we were expected to stay.

Cells, for example, would be a dead giveaway.

"Your luggage was brought along and will be placed in your rooms," Nora finished. "If you will accompany me, I will be happy to show you to your sleeping quarters."

"And I will see you both this evening. I look forward to hearing your… _accounts_ of what happened," Chancellor Kader said, her dark eyes meeting mine and lingering thoughtfully. She didn't smile, but I thought I heard a teasing note in the way she emphasized that last word. My lips curved in a polite smile as I nodded my goodnight, but I was wary. I suspected that the new Magister had several questions for me, but that they would have little to do with Nan Flanagan.

As Pam and I followed Nora to our quarters, my progeny was keeping her eyes glued to my sister's admittedly shapely ass. If it weren't for the guards hovering in our footsteps, I think my child might have shared her thoughts, but even Pam knew better than to comment on the desirability of an Authority official where it could be overheard by vampire hearing.

We went to Pam's quarters, first. It was attractive and modern, with a king-sized bed and discreet track lighting, and Pam's bag at the foot of the bed.

It definitely wasn't a cell.

Not that there weren't going to be guards.

"Miss de Beaufort, if you need anything at all, one of our staff will be outside at all times," Nora said. "I would advise against trying to find your way around on our own. The complex is extensive and naturally, many areas are not meant for the public."

Pam looked at me nervously, clearly anxious about being separated. Although we were in full view of the guard and Nora, I pulled my daughter to me in a light embrace and pressed my lips against her forehead. "Sleep well, Pamela. I will see you this evening." I gave her a reassuring wink before turning to follow Nora, leaving one Authority trooper outside my progeny's door.

My own room was reached only after a handful of turns; not enough to be suspiciously distant, but far enough to make it challenging for Pam and I to meet easily without requesting the assistance of our oh-so-helpful guards.

My room was nearly identical to Pam's, right down to the bag settled on the floor. "I hope you find your accommodations suitable, Sheriff Northman," my sister said formally. She stepped closer to me, close enough that I could smell her familiar and much-beloved scent. "I would like to speak to you privately before daybreak, Sheriff. About Miss Flanagan's last moments, as she was a personal friend," she said more loudly for the benefit of the guard near the door. "After you've unpacked your bag, please ask your attendant to escort you to my chambers."

"Certainly, Chancellor," I murmured. She gave me a long look with her lovely blue eyes before turning and exiting my bedroom.

**~*E&S*~**

Sookie

I rolled over in my bed with a moan. Another wave of what had wakened me rushed through my body, only to coalesce on the hot, damp center between my thighs. Mmmmmmm. I rolled my hips as I felt the arousal within me. My heavy eyelids barely opened as I became more aware.

_Eric. Horny, aroused Eric. _

As I started to brush my hand against the outside of my panties, my sleep-fogged mind finally caught up with my body.

_What. The. Fuck?_

I tuned in enough to the emotions coursing through my body to realize that my own arousal was just a reflection of whatever was going on with him.

And I don't know how I knew, but I did know: this arousal had nothing to do with me.

Eric was somewhere, with someone else, doing something that left his emotions humming with lust.

That was bad enough, but the part that really kicked me in the gut was the other feeling I could feel coming from him.

Love.

Eric was with someone he _loved._ And it wasn't me.

**A/N: So, did anyone catch the hotel name's punny meaning? ;-D**

**My goal is to update weekly even if it means shorter chapters in future, but just a heads up that weekends are my prime writing time and the next two weekends are going to be busier than normal. I'm hoping to finish another chapter for next weekend (especially since this one was a bit of a cliffy!) but I will probably have to skip posting the last weekend of October because of a business trip. My apologies in advance if you have to wait. **

**XOXOXO to everyone who is following this, even if you are annoyed with my Sookie. And a BIG thank you to the reviewers who appreciate that I am taking my time to lead Sookie through some changes just as I did with Eric. If I haven't written to thank you directly, it's because you are logged in as a guest, but I value each and every review. Team Sooric all the way, baby! **


	4. Chapter 4: Sparks Fly

**A/N: Y'all seemed a bit freaked out by the way that last chapter ended, so I took pity on you and wrote my little heart out to get this next chapter to you earlier than my usual Sunday posting schedule. I meant to torture Sookie a bit, not my readers! I hope this will help you forgive me – and Eric. **** Note: This chapter was slightly revised after a couple of readers were left with impressions I had not intended about Eric's motivations. Hopefully this version clears that up. **

**Chapter 4: Sparks Fly **

Eric

It didn't take long for me to unpack the clothes I had with me, so I was on my way to Nora's quarters shortly. As the guard escorted me to my sister's chambers, I was aware of the number of surveillance cameras discreetly positioned in all hallways. Evidently, one didn't do anything in Authority headquarters without the risk of someone watching.

"Chancellor Gainsborough, I've brought Sheriff Northman as you requested," the guard announced as he led me into a spacious room. It was more elaborate than the guest room I had been given and I couldn't help but notice a familiar piece of furniture to one side of the room. I repressed a smirk. One could take the girl out of Plantagenet England, but one couldn't take the Plantagenet England out of the girl: Nora still had her much beloved, massive oak bedframe, with her human family's crest carved into the ornate headboard. She had been delighted when she had located it in the 1700s and been able to obtain it for herself and although it periodically had been placed in storage, I knew she had kept it with her as often as was practical.

I had fucked her many times on that bed over the centuries. I felt a pang of nostalgia for our shared past. In many ways, Nora and I were too much alike to always get along, but there had always been attraction between us, and I did love her. Now more than ever, as she was one of the few remaining links to my history with Godric. Despite my affection for my vampire sister, it had been a few years since Nora and I had actually seen each other face to face, largely due to her desire to keep our relations discreet due to her political position. Instead, we generally kept in touch by phone and our conversations were often convoluted tangles of innuendo, code and mixed languages in order to remain opaque to listeners.

Fucking vampire politics. While I knew Godric had chosen Nora because of her political talents and that she loved her role in the vampire power structure, I still hated the posturing and game playing that was inherent in that world.

Nora had tortured me endlessly once she knew I had been expected to succeed my father's role as king in my human family, insisting that I could still fulfill my destiny as a ruler among vampires. I had tried repeatedly to explain to her that while I might eventually have embraced that role in my human life and led the small tribal kingdom of my father, times had changed and the requirements of rule over a people had changed. Modern rule was too impersonal and too irritating. I had no interest in taking responsibility for an area larger than I had as an Area Sheriff. Being a king like Compton or, worse yet, someone involved in the national or international power structure of vampires simply required kissing too much ass.

My disdain for politics aside, I wasn't above using my political connections to get what I wanted, however. And what I wanted right now was to keep Sookie the fuck out of whatever might come out at this trial.

Nora was curled up in a chaise lounge with a book when I arrived. She put the book down and stood to greet me, her behavior cordial but not overly warm with the guard still nearby. "Sheriff Northman," she said politely. "Please come and have a seat with me. I would like to hear your account of Nan Flanagan's death since you were a witness. Nan was a dear friend." She nodded her dark head at the guard, who closed the door behind him as he left.

As soon as he was gone, she twined her arms around my neck and pulled me down for an affectionate kiss, slipping her tongue between my lips for just a moment and then pulling away. "_Bror_," she murmured in greeting before continuing. "There is a white noise generator in the room, so we don't need to worry about the guards overhearing us here. And Chancellors are exempt from having cameras in our rooms as well, so we can speak – and act – freely here." She smirked at little at the last bit and I knew she was hinting that we could enjoy our reunion as we traditionally had, with a vigorous round of sexual acrobatics.

Well, fuck. I hadn't thought about the problems seeing Nora would present.

Of course, Nora was going to expect our interactions to be what she had been used to for the past six hundred years. And "old Eric" would have been happy to fuck her stupid.

But being in love with Sookie had changed something in how I viewed sex. For a thousand years, it had never been anything more than an extremely entertaining diversion. But with Sookie, sex had been … a revelation. There had been an emotional component I had never experienced before that had, for the first time, made the act transcend beyond simple fucking. And as trite as "making love" sounded, that was the phrase that best captured what the difference had been: sex with Sookie had been about my expressing my love for her, not just using our bodies to get each other off.

And now, for the first time, I was faced with the choice of being offered a fuck when making love with Sookie was the only sex I really wanted.

The problem wasn't that I couldn't say "no" to Nora – but that if I said "no," my sibling would _insist_ on an explanation. And that might not have been a problem if Nora had simply been the little sister of an Area Sheriff, with no power and few connections. But my sister – my lovely, ambitious and very powerful sister – was a fucking Authority Chancellor.

No, if I said "no" and she managed to get the real reason why out of me, I didn't entirely trust her to protect Sookie from the rest of the Authority.

Not only should I have expected that, I should have thought up a reason to decline Nora's advances before I ever entered her room because my mind now seemed frozen in coming up with anything – besides the truth – that would sound even _faintly_ plausible to excuse such a sea change in my usual behavior.

Again, _fuck. _

"But, business first," Nora said, to my relief as it bought me time to think. She took my hand and led me to the chaise seat. "So, tell me what has really been going on these last few days. Compton told us you had been sent to clear out a nest of necromancers and then had disappeared for several days. He claimed you were hiding in a human home?" As we seated ourselves, Nora continued to hold one of my hands and let her other hand rest familiarly on my thigh.

"The witches had erased my memory," I conceded, trying to ignore the pale hand as it began to move in rhythmic little strokes against the fabric of my black jeans. "I managed to find shelter with a human who recognized me and could be trusted not to betray me."

"But then Compton found you anyhow?" Nora's eyes were fixed on my face, her worry for me evident. "You very nearly met the true death at his request once he had you, brother. What on earth have you done to make an enemy of that pompous little twit?" Then, with a shake of her head and a grimace, Nora took her hand from my thigh and held it up. "Never mind, stupid question. Nan said the two of you had a bad habit of letting personal issues interfere with common sense. Although she was never clear about what those personal issues were."

"You know how it is," I said nonchalantly. "Compton has been a thorn in my side since he and Lorena made messes in my area in California. That Nan made him a regent is fucking unbelievable."

"And I don't imagine you bother to hide that sentiment," Nora said with a chuckle.

"I'll hide it tomorrow night, don't worry," I reassured her. "I'm well aware of where we are and what is expected of me."

_Speaking of which…_

Nora's hand dropped again to my lap, this time directly on my crotch, where she began to run her fingers lightly along the length of what she found there, as I tried to ignore her action. She raised her chin and smiled teasingly. "You know you owe me for saving your life from Compton," she said in a mischievous voice. Through the material of my jeans, she squeezed my cock, which had begun to harden purely from the physical stimulation. "I was able to persuade the Authority that until we were certain of the influence of the necromancers, it was worth keeping you alive." A thumb rubbed across the tip of my partial erection and I jerked reflexively. "Of course, I told them your value lay in your business acumen," she said with a half-smile. "Since ability to wield a broadsword isn't as appreciated these days."

This was our old dance of seduction, but I was going to have to change the steps, and quickly, before my body started to lead my will astray.

I casually pulled Nora's hand from my lap and held it, distracting her by rubbing my thumb in the center of her palm in a way I knew she liked. I leaned over and pressed a chaste kiss to her forehead, saying lightly, "Then thank you for saving my life – especially with such a bullshit answer. You know that Pamela is the one with the better business sense." I smiled lopsidedly at her. I genuinely appreciated her effort to protect me and felt a rush of love for my sibling, grateful that she had been instrumental in saving me from the stake. "Given that the witches subsequently did capture me and try to use me as a weapon at the tolerance rally, I'm surprised the Authority hasn't shown their regret at following your recommendation. Or have they?" I raised an eyebrow at her.

Nora grew serious again and held onto both my hands, buying me a brief respite from the sexual tension. "Honestly, there is more discontent that the Guardian's current policies didn't allow Compton to put the coven leader down while she was still in his custody. It would have saved all of us a lot of trouble. But the Guardian –" Nora shook her dark head. "He's very devoted to the mainstreaming cause. To the point of taking foolish risks in order to protect our reputation with humans." I could hear the bitterness in Nora's voice.

"What about Nan Flanagan's death?" I asked curiously. "How bad are the repercussions?"

Nora snorted. "Personally, I don't think anyone misses Nan and her sharp tongue, but she was the public face of mainstreaming, so we have to go through the motions. Not that her killer will receive a just penance for the taking of a vampire life." Nora's lips pursed. "Obviously the human who killed Nan should simply have been executed immediately, but Roman has this idea that we have to make a show of respecting the human's rights." Nora rolled her eyes at the last bit before tilting her head at me. "Since you were there, why don't you tell me exactly what happened? You know that there is still some suspicion that it wasn't the human at all, or that she might have been acting on someone else's orders. Perhaps Compton's."

"Oh, because Bill Compton is _obviously_ a secret Sanguinista," I said sarcastically. "He may have been a ruthless bastard in his younger days, but I think he has truly bought into the mainstreaming agenda, Nora. And while Nan was a bitch, I can't think of a single reason for him to want her dead." _Any reason besides Sookie_, that is, but that was one reason I had no interest in sharing. "No, Tara Thornton was solely responsible for Nan," I said definitively.

I filled Nora in on the details of what happened – leaving out Sookie's role beyond having brought the medium and his boyfriend into the equation. As far as my sister was concerned, Tara had killed Nan as a political statement against vampire kind in general.

"Who the hell is this Thornton girl, anyhow? The necromancer told us before we killed her that the girl wasn't even a regular part of the coven, but had just wandered in on the night you were bespelled. I found that ridiculously convenient." Nora's hand began to stroke a certain spot on my side gently as she spoke – one she knew from experience was particularly stimulating for me – and I could feel a tingle of arousal growing again. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"She is a cousin to one of the other witches and I find it credible that she was just there by coincidence," I said. "From what I have heard, Ms. Thornton has extraordinarily bad luck. Wrong time, wrong place." I added drily, "Wrong vampire. Apparently, Franklin Mott took a 'romantic' interest in her for some time last year before he vanished."

"Ah," Nora sighed with understanding. "Her luck can't be _all _bad if she made it through such 'interest' alive. Although I have to wonder how she did. Franklin's obsessions don't usually survive his attachment to them." She made a face. "Perhaps he met the true death with a wooden bullet at this girl's hands, too. No loss there, though, if that's the case." Her hand had slipped under the back edge of my shirt and was now running slowly across the skin of my back in smooth, even circles.

I hated to admit it, but it was making my cock start to twitch again. Was sexual response always this hard to control? I tried to remember if I had ever _tried_ to resist a woman before only to quickly realize that I had never had a reason not to follow my dick's impulses before – until Sookie.

"Mmmmm, enough business talk," she murmured, leaning forward to run her tongue along the soft skin beneath my ear. "You mustn't stay the day, but we have a little while before sunrise. Enough for a good, hard quickie at least." Nora's blunt teeth nipped at my earlobe. One hand continued to wander more purposefully across my back while her other hand had once again begun to explore the front of my jeans. "I have to say, brother, I hadn't remembered you smelling quite so enticing in the past," Nora said thickly. The hand moved from my lap to my jaw and she turned my head so that she could kiss me in earnest. As her tongue slipped between my lips and sought out mine, I could feel my body betraying me as it began to hum with remembered lust for her porcelain skin and silky dark hair.

Well, so much for having bought time by talking business or hoping Nora would lose interest. Time was running out on my thinking of an excuse not to fuck Nora that didn't involve revealing my bond with Sookie. While I wanted more than anything to announce to the world at large that Sookie was _Mine_ in the most significant way another being could belong to a vampire, making such a pronouncement to an Authority Chancellor while in the depths of Authority headquarters was neither the wisest time or place. That I had created a _blóðfesta_ bond with a human was going to be controversial at best, and if anyone knew about Sookie's true nature, it was likely to create a true threat for _min __blóð__frig._ No one could know; not even my sister. No. _Especially_ my sister.

Nora seemed to notice that my response was somewhat distracted and grew more intent than ever on holding my attention, leaning into me to press her breasts against my chest.

I had loved Nora for so long as a friend, as a brother, and as a fondly remembered lover that it seemed strange to not follow the instincts of centuries and screw the hell out of her. For a moment, as my body reacted to her touches, I wondered if I was being a fucking idiot to even hesitate. As angry as Sookie was about the bond, as little as she seemed to value it, maybe the practical solution was to just do what I would normally have done. Maybe holding back with Nora was just a meaningless waste of energy and will.

I was still torn over the temptation to just give in to the seduction of Nora's lips and hands as they continued to roam over me or to think up a convincing excuse not to when I felt Sookie wake up.

Sookie

The realization that Eric was with someone else and experiencing a mixture of love and lust was like a knife in my gut. And while I felt a strange hesitancy and anxiety from him amidst all the sexual tension, what I fixated on was that he was having feelings like that for someone – _anyone_ – who wasn't me. Yes, I had told him I wasn't ready for what he had done to bond me to him, but I had told him I needed time and space, not for him to run off and _fuck someone else_ less than 24 hours later.

Especially if I had to _feel _his emotions while he did it.

As Lafayette would have said, _fuck no, he didn't_!

And fuck no, _he wouldn't_, if I had anything to do with it.

For all that I had been angry with Eric at the unexpected consequences of the bond, I was reminded as the hurt swelled up inside me that on some deep, primal level I had come to feel over the past few days that Eric – whoever he was – was _mine._ And while I might not be comfortable yet with the idea that Eric saw me as _his_, I was not ready to give up what was mine so easily.

I had made a point of stifling my emotions the last few hours by purposefully distracting myself, but I let rip with what I was feeling at that moment. If he was going to fuck someone else, he was going to know how I felt about it. I was not going to play "the good –" The good _what_? Girlfriend? Wife? I couldn't remember the funny Norse name Eric had used for me, but whatever it was, I wasn't going to lie here being a good whatever-it-was while he deliberately screwed someone else.

_Jealousy_, _fury_ and _outrage_ poured through the bond at him. _Mine, mine, MINE!_ And then, because I couldn't help it, _hurt_. Tremendous, deep, _painful_ betrayal. If he really loved me, how could he do whatever he was doing, knowing I could feel it?

I slammed him emotionally with everything I had. And as I did so, in the pre-dawn darkness of my bedroom, a ball of light burst out of my chest and vanished with a pop, making me yelp with surprise. What the fuck had _that _been?

Eric

It was like being hit with an avalanche. The feelings tumbled at me faster than I could process them – _jealousy_, _fury_, _possessiveness _and a raw, primal _hurt_ that cleared my mind instantly. At once, the hazy lust for Nora evaporated as if had never been. I needed to pull away from her, even if I didn't have a lie ready to cover my motivation. I slid my hands to her upper arms, finally moving to push her away –

Just then, every point where Nora was in contact with me – my back, my mouth, my chest where she pressed against me and the back of my head where one hand had slid into my hair – suddenly flared with a brilliant flash of light that _burned _as it snapped and sparked.

In an instant, Nora had scrambled away from me with a shriek, even as I jumped up, equally shocked. "Eric, _what the fuck_!?" she squealed at me, fangs out, the back of her hand pressing protectively against her burn-reddened mouth.

The door slammed open and the guard was inside at vamp speed. "Ma'am, sorry to intrude, but I heard you scream. Is everything okay in here?"

Nora was still trembling and I had thrust my hands into the air as soon as the armed soldier had burst into the room, trying my best to look harmless.

My sister was still staring at me in shock, but she quickly regained her composure. "We're fine. Sheriff Northman simply…startled me. I'm fine." She waved her hand at the guard dismissively. "Thank you for checking, but you can go."

The guard looked at both of us doubtfully and then withdrew, quietly shutting the door behind him.

I dropped my hands. "White noise generator?" I looked at her skeptically.

She frowned in annoyance. "Enough of one to cover most normal conversational levels, _yes_. The guards are also trained to ignore anything they should happen to hear – unless it sounds as if we're in danger, of course." She approached me warily, studying me. "But, Eric, what the fuck _was_ that?" She was staring in bewilderment at the lightly burned areas on her hands, which I could see were already starting to heal.

"I don't know," I said honestly. "It's never happened before."

Even before the sparks of energy had hit Nora and me, I had been considering how to _tactfully_ break our embrace, but apparently, the bond – or Sookie – was impatient with my slowness to act. I pressed carefully on my bottom lip with a fingertip, still feeling a buzzing tingle where it had been in contact with Nora when the flash occurred – but, surprisingly, I felt no pain.

"It didn't harm you," Nora pronounced as she frowned at my unburned mouth. "Lift the back of your shirt," she commanded. I did as she requested and from behind me she muttered, "Not a mark. What the hell?"

I gnawed subtly at the inside of my lips, trying to think of any reasonable explanation besides the truth, but I was distracted by Sookie's still irritated feelings. Somehow I suspected that explaining I didn't intend to let things get that far wouldn't have calmed her down much.

Nora circled me cautiously, sniffing the air with a scowl. "And you really _do_ smell different." Suddenly she snatched at my hand and in unknowing mimicry of the same movement with which I had bonded with Sookie, nipped at my palm with her fangs and then licked the blood that welled up. I tensed, wondering if another bolt of light was going to zap her, but this time, nothing happened. Instead, a small frisson went through her body and she ran her tongue over her lips. "My God, you even _taste_ different. Sweeter… What _is_ this? Is it something the witches did to you?"

Well, shit, that was an explanation that just _might _work, I thought rapidly. It was a logical, easy possibility that could cover almost anything that the bond brought about in me. Who knew what strange ways a witch's spell could manifest?

Although it would be odd to lie so blatantly to Nora, with whom I'd always been honest before. She was my sister. We had been siblings and sporadic lovers for nearly six centuries and she was on the very short list of those I could say I had loved since my turning. Family – both human and vampire – had always come first with me.

Until Sookie.

The truth was, I simply wasn't sure yet how much I could trust Nora when it came to Sookie, and I wasn't willing to chance it.

"I don't know what else it could be but something the witches did," I lied, meeting her eyes. "I just know that I haven't been the same since the spell. But the necromancer is dead, isn't she? So I'm hoping that whatever was done to me isn't a danger to others, just an annoyance to me." I tried to sound slightly worried but still confident that I was safe to be around.

Well, "safe" unless you touched me with lustful intent, anyhow. I was still baffled at how Sookie's light had made me "untouchable" from afar but I had no doubt that was what had happened.

Nora let out an exasperated sigh. "I wish we had known this before we executed the witch. _Now_ how can we find out how to undo what she did?" She looked at me with consternation. "And we can't really be sure there isn't something dangerous about your state. We _have_ to bring this to the attention of the Council –" Nora began, her hand reaching automatically for my arm, only to stop dead mid-air, no doubt thinking twice for fear more sparks would suddenly appear.

"_No,_ Nora!" I said forcefully. "Give me some time to seek answers on my own first." I raised my eyebrows at her. "You know that the Authority doesn't have patience with…_unexpected developments_. You _know _I can't trust them to give me time to figure this out once they know. They'll just give me the True Death without hesitating. I know it and _you_ know it."

My sister frowned in uncertainty. She knew I was right about the likely attitude of the Authority if they thought I had lingering effects from the spell.

With a sigh, she crossed her arms in front of her chest. "So, your blood is changed and – what – you can't be touched? At least not for very long? Or in certain ways? I'm confused, Eric. This makes no sense."

"I didn't know about the touching problem until tonight," I said truthfully_. Or the change in my blood_, but that seemed like a dangerous admission to make. "I have no explanation for that whatsoever. Perhaps it is some sort of …curse?"

"Intended to do what? Keep you from fucking?" Nora asked skeptically.

_Errrr…_evidently. And I felt uneasy to think Sookie must be assuming I fully intended to do just that.

I never hated my quickly responsive dick so much as I did at that moment and almost wished it _had_ been cursed.

"Well, it wouldn't be a curse if it didn't fuck up some aspect of my life, would it." I pointed out reasonably. "And fucking with my fucking is pretty effective as far as a curse goes."

Actually, I should file the concept away for future consideration. It was rather diabolical.

"You're awfully sanguine for someone who might be forced into celibacy because of some wretched sorceress who is now dead," Nora grumbled. "My God, I thought witches were all about 'acts of passion showing devotion to their goddess' or whatever," she continued irritably. "Evil fucking crones. We should burn the whole lot of them the way we used to." She regarded me with wariness. "So, if this untouchability nonsense is new, what made you think you might still be affected by witchcraft?"

"I had simply noticed – as has Pam – that I seem more..." My voice trailed off as I tried to think of an acceptable word that wouldn't set off alarm bells. 'More in love with a fairy hybrid' and 'more inclined to be, well, _good_,' wasn't going to cut it. "More _human_, perhaps. In the way I feel…perhaps in the way I think."

In an administration where mainstreaming was the ideal, being more _human_ should be a good thing, right? At least, not cause for alarm. Or potential imprisonment.

To my surprise, Nora's face wrinkled with disgust. "Oh, Christ, I do hope not," she said with a grimace. She quickly smoothed her face as if to hide her initial reaction and regarded me with pitying eyes. "Eric, you have always been the – the _epitome_ of what a vampire should be because of the way our father raised us. Even if he lost his way towards the end of his life."

I stiffened. When we had last spoken of Godric, Nora had not expressed anything less than deep love and admiration for our Maker. Had her views changed since then?

Nora's eyes were reddening with unshed tears and she tentatively clutched at the material of my shirt, careful not to contact my skin beneath. "Whatever is wrong with you, Eric, we'll fix it. I promise you," she said earnestly. "I won't let you turn out like father." She spoke the words like a vow.

I frowned at that, but Nora didn't notice. A bloody tear slipped down her cheek and she wiped it brusquely away, leaving a pink smear behind. "I won't say anything to anyone. At least, not unless I truly _have_ to. And only if it will _protect you_." She looked at me with compassion.

Apparently, my "feeling more human" was a tremendous mood-killer to Nora. Too bad I hadn't realized that a little earlier.

"Thank you, Nora," I said, looking suitably grateful for her silence about my "curse."

I felt like shit lying to my beloved sister. But not enough to tell her the truth, not when it could expose Sookie and our _blóðfesta. _And until I was certain that Nora wouldn't let that information slip to the wrong person, I was going to keep my own counsel about why I seemed…different.

"Well…this was not the way I hoped our reunion would go." The corner of Nora's mouth turned up in a wry half smile. "You should go back to your room. We'll be facing a long night tonight."

"I'm sorry, Nora," I said with genuine regret. I was relieved that things hadn't gone further between us than I had wished, but I was not used to deceiving family this way. "I had hoped you wouldn't notice anything amiss with me until I could…resolve things on my own."

Granted, the only thing I had to "resolve" was convincing Sookie that our bond was a good thing, but I still needed time to accomplish that.

"Eric," Nora said gently. "I'm always your sister first and Authority second. You should know that." Her blue eyes met mine and I could see that she believed what she was saying.

I wished I believed it as completely as she did.

"Although I would appreciate it if you don't repeat that while you're here," she added wryly. "Trust no one while here, brother. Except me, of course." For a moment, Nora looked sad and I felt a pang of guilt that my trust in her was weak enough for me to be withholding information from her.

I hoped that, if she ever realized I had not been forthright with her, she'd understand the need to protect those you love and forgive me for this deceit.

She approached the door and opened it before turning to me and saying smoothly, "Thank you for your account of Miss Flanagan's untimely demise, Sheriff. And I am sorry that I reacted so emotionally to your vivid recounting of how…_unexpected _the unjustified attack against her was." The guard stepped through the doorway, his eyes still wary as he regarded the two of us.

"And I apologize that my account of what happened distressed you so strongly," I replied. "My condolences on your loss," I said formally, bowing.

Whatever the guard thought of what he'd seen, he didn't say anything as he escorted me back to my guest room.

Once I had stripped my clothes off and slipped between the smooth sheets, I let myself feel for Sookie. As I had been talking with Nora, I'd felt Sookie's _anger_ and _outrage_ fade, to be replaced by _worry_ and, ultimately, _remorse._ I wondered if she had any idea what had happened. I felt for my cell phone and discovered that, as Nora had warned, I had no service in the Authority bunker. So much for talking with Sookie, which I suddenly wanted to do desperately. I wanted to at least try to explain what had been happening and why her…disruption…had been welcome.

With nothing but our bond to keep me company, I pondered what exactly Sookie had done. The blast of light had to be something to do with her fae powers, but I was baffled as to how she could manifest such a thing at a distance. Feeling her increased concern for me – perhaps she had some clue that something spectacular and unusual had occurred, even if she wasn't sure what – I sent her a wave of reassurance that I was fine. That I loved her. That I was _hers _– even if she wasn't sure she wanted me.

As I lay there, I remembered the expression on Nora's face after her touch had resulted in a very different sort of "spark" than she had expected, and my mouth twitched. That my feisty _blóð__frig _had made her own distinctive claim on me, even from hundreds of miles away and despite our current discord, struck me as so quintessentially _Sookie_ that I had to laugh out loud. And as I shifted in my lonely bed – content not to have anyone there if it couldn't be Sookie – I realized that the fact she could make me laugh even while negotiating the deadly threats of the snake pit that was the Authority was one reason why I loved her so desperately.

**A/N: I'll try to get another chapter up, if not this weekend, than by next Tuesday, since I will away for a few days after that. Thanks for the reviews and all the favorites despite the angst and crazy-making behavior of our favorite couple at this point in my story! XOXXOXOXOX**


	5. Chapter 5: Big Faker

**A/N: What. A. Week! I went out of town for work from Wednesday through Saturday last week (which meant no time to write) and got home just ahead of our "guest," Sandy. I am one of the most fortunate people here in New Jersey: our power outage lasted only 10 hours, we had no flooding and no physical damage to our home. However, we are still surrounded by devastation and I am not likely to be able to go back to work until after the weekend because my workplace has no power and some significant damage (including a flood in my office!) Thank you to everyone who has sent up positive thoughts/energy/prayers for us on the East Coast. We do feel it. Love you all. XOXXOOXXOXO**

**PS. The plus side to not being able to report to work and still having power at home: I can get caught up on my writing. Silver lining in the midst of the storm, folks…**

**Chapter 5: Big Faker**

Sookie

_What in the hell had just happened? _

One moment I was smacking Eric through the bond with the force of my anger, jealousy and hurt – feeling almost like I was throwing a giant emotional brick at his stupid blond head – and then next thing I knew, a big-ass ball of light had burst from my chest only to vanish in the dark.

As soon as I'd let my angry feelings flow, the flame of arousal Eric had been experiencing evaporated as if it had been doused with a bucket of ice water. In its place, I felt his tangled response of embarrassment, remorse, and a surprising sense of relief that lasted for just a moment before the light flared out of my body and his feelings were swept away in a rush of shock.

I bolted upright in my bed, yelping in surprise. What in the _hell_? I anxiously pressed a hand to my chest, but the only thing I could feel was my own heart still pounding furiously. If it hadn't been for the timing of Eric's reaction, I might not have made the connection, but it seemed too coincidental to me that immediately after the flash of light, Eric had suddenly gone from responding to my feelings to a stunned confusion.

Well, crap. As pissed off as I was at him, I still felt a little tingle of worry that I might have hurt him. I probed warily through the bond, and couldn't feel any sense of pain or hurt, just disorientation and a tiny ripple of…amusement?

Oh, so he thought whatever had happened was _funny_? Well, fuck him. I sourly hoped that whatever my runaway light had done, it had lit up a _certain part_ of him like a big ol' Roman – or in this case, Viking – candle.

Before I could work myself up into another round of fury, I felt Eric's shock turn to tension and wariness.

By then, my sleep-fogged head was beginning to clear a bit and I was trying to _think_, not just feel. That there might be some skanky ho with Eric in Vampire Authority headquarters didn't exactly surprise me – I'd met a couple of vamp tramps in the time I'd been involved with the supe world, and Fangtasia was filled _every night_ with dozens of human ones lusting after my – my whatever-Eric-was-to-me-now. But I was disappointed to think he'd been apparently making out with one. _What the hell?_ As my heart began to sting again, I felt a little soft push of love from him as if he was trying to apologize to me, and that made me think about the other feeling I had been sensing, the one that _really_ got under my skin.

Who in the fuck could Eric _love_ at the Authority?

Granted, it didn't feel exactly the same as the love he felt for me, but what the hell was I supposed to make of a mixture of love and lust for whoever it was?

An ex? Eric had been around a long time, and the Authority had to be run by all these ancient vamps, so I suppose the odds were pretty good that one of them might be someone Eric had hooked up with in the past.

_More than hooked up with_, my jealous inner voice pointed out. Someone he seemed to _care about._

I suddenly noticed that Eric's strain and guardedness seemed to be going on for a long time and I began to wonder nervously if he was in some sort of trouble.

Eric had never seemed very fond of the Authority, but I'd never believed Eric to be actually _scared_ of it, although Nan Flanagan had acted in Dallas like he _should_ be. Given that Eric might be the oldest and strongest vampire in Louisiana, it made me wonder how much older or more powerful vamps in the Authority had to be, and that made my heart skip a beat. What if they were all as old or as powerful or Russell Edgington had been? I had been so worried for what Tara had to be going through in the center of vampire power, it hadn't occurred to me that Eric, even as strong and old as he was, could be at risk, too.

He sure felt like he was treading carefully now, and I began to worry that whatever I had done had put him in some kind of threatening situation. He sure seemed tense about whatever was happening.

When I felt him begin to lie – big ol' whoppers of lies that I didn't have to hear to know they were not true, just based on his feelings – I grew convinced that he was in some kind of deep shit and that I may have helped put him there with whatever my little light show had done. The last bits of my anger towards him faded away, lost in increasing concern for his safety as I waited, helplessly feeling for whatever would happen next. Mixed in with Eric's anxiety and deceitfulness was a strengthening thread that felt like relief, as if he had been afraid he wouldn't be able to sell whatever lie he'd come up with.

And then I had a little shocking realization. I kept lying there, immersed in Eric's emotions until I was sure what I was feeling, and when I was, I didn't know what to think.

_Eric Northman was not a natural born liar_.

Not that he wasn't good at lying (something I'd seen for myself) but I could tell from being inside his emotions that he had to _work_ at it. I could feel it in the way his anxiety escalated with the deceit, the tension as he tried to sustain illusion, the relief when he felt he was convincing.

The Eric I had gotten to know over the last few days seemed honest and transparent, but I had always assumed that the 'regular' Eric would be able to lie effortlessly, cold as a stone inside. Instead, there was all this … _turmoil_ inside him.

With a sudden wave of sickness, I realized I'd let Eric go off to the Authority without much worry, confident he could take care of himself. But if he wasn't as good at lying as I had always thought, he might be in real danger. And what else did he really have to lie to the Authority about besides _me_? He had made it clear at the tolerance rally that he was committed to not letting them find out about my fae blood. He might not even have been in that den of vampire vipers if it hadn't been for what Tara had done to protect me.

Just as I was beginning to panic with worry for him, I felt Eric's anxiety and guardedness finally begin to relax just a tiny bit. Whatever he had been lying about, apparently whoever he had been lying to (_the skanky ho?_) had believed it. As his relief grew, so did mine. For the moment, he seemed to be safe. I felt him respond to my concern, sending me reassurance that he was fine, and in turn I felt myself relax little by little.

As his feelings settled down, I frowned, still puzzled by what had just happened. Bill had told me how many dozens of times that Eric was a master manipulator and expert liar, but the reality I had just experienced from Eric's own perspective was … different. In my mind, I started turning over the lies Eric had told me in the past, trying to reconcile what I'd just learned about him with what I had believed until now.

He had lied to me to get me to drink his blood after the explosion at Godric's house, and as I thought back to it, remembering the overly dramatic way Eric had flopped his head back against the floor, announcing he was "dying," maybe in retrospect I should have known he was bullshitting me. That said, his intent had clearly been to fool me, so I wouldn't give him a pass there, I decided.

He didn't tell me that he was using my blood to trick Russell, but I wondered again if that was because he was trying to make his lies to Russell convincing. I had to admit that I wasn't the best of liars myself and it was probably smart of Eric not to let me know he didn't intend to let me come to harm. My screams of terror had been completely genuine when he and Russell bit me. I didn't like that he hadn't told me what he was really up to, but I could kind of understand it, especially if he was worried about convincing Russell of his agenda.

And he lied to me about not knowing the meaning of the Operation Werewolf symbol, but just a few hours later, he'd been on my doorstep telling me the truth – and questioning why he was telling me that much at all. So, if someone tells you the truth later – and even admits what went before was a lie – does the first lie still count?

And, of course, he lied to me about what would happen when we took each other's blood.

I stopped myself right there, suddenly conscious that I was jumping to a conclusion based on what I'd thought of Eric – until now. _Had _he lied to me about the blood exchange? _"We will be one."_ I couldn't deny he'd said something like that, even if I hadn't understood what he'd meant. Or _asked_ what he meant. I rolled over in my bed, remembering the hopeful, open expression on his face as he'd offered his hand to me. Whatever "that" Eric had wanted from me, I couldn't believe it was maliciously intended. No, he had loved me and wanted to be close to me and had seen the bond as the way to demonstrate that.

And "this" Eric…he said he hadn't been consciously withholding information about the bond. He claimed that he loved me as much as the "other" Eric.

The question was, could I believe that? Or was the real Eric truly the liar I had always believed him to be?

As I lay there pondering Eric's history of lies, trying to figure out the truth, something else suddenly hit me.

The number of his lies I'd come up with was actually surprisingly short.

Other than the handful of lies I had just been thinking about, I couldn't actually remember any other times that Eric had been dishonest with me. And in some of the incidents I'd been thinking of, I could kind of see why he'd withheld information.

So, why had I _always_ thought Eric was such a big, fat liar?

The answer was so simple that I almost missed it.

_Bill. _ Bill who was always telling me what a liar Eric was.

Bill who had not told me he'd been sent by his queen to procure me. Bill who had let me get beaten nearly to death by two lowlifes in order to get his blood into me. Bill who hadn't told me about turning Jessica until he couldn't hide it any more. Bill who told me he'd killed Russell Edgington _and_ Eric when he hadn't actually killed either.

Bill who might not have told me all of that at all if _Eric_ hadn't told me the truth first.

So, _who_ was the master manipulator and skilled liar in this scenario?

I was suddenly so annoyed with myself for never having thought that through before that I actually smacked my pillow with my first. I'd taken Bill's word where Eric was concerned all this time. But whose word was more believable now?

I suddenly wished I could call Eric and talk to him about all of these thoughts and feelings. And maybe ask him a few questions I wanted answered. I stared at the cell phone beside my bed, conscious that I did not have Eric's number programmed into it. I had never, ever called Eric before the incident with the spell, and he had lost his phone before he ever came to be with me, so I didn't have a clue what his cell phone number was.

But I did have Pam's.

Ignoring the thought I was not her favorite person at the moment, I sat up in my bed and dialed Pam's number.

To my disappointment, the phone system announced that the user was not available, but my call did go to Pam's voicemail, where I politely asked her to call me back with Eric's phone number and wished her well during her "business trip."

I wondered if Eric was still okay. He'd been emotionally quiet the last few minutes and I reached out to him, trying to check on his well-being. To my surprise (and a distinct sense of relief), he responded with reassurance that he was _fine, safe, secure_. And then, it was like a wall came down and Eric's feelings, which had been so carefully guarded while he'd been deceiving his companions in the vampire headquarters, were suddenly all around – no, _inside_ and _throughout_ me, like a cozy, affectionate blanket.

He _loved me_ – _deeply_ and _completely_. And he was _mine_ – whether I wanted him to be or not. He _belonged to me and me only_, and whatever I felt towards him, it didn't matter, he just loved me anyhow. And I could feel that he found this amusing, although I didn't get the joke.

I still felt a little tentative after the bizarre way I had woken up to find him half-seduced by someone else, but I responded to the flood of his love by letting him feel that I was worried for him and that I wanted him to be safe. And if I wasn't quite as open with my love for him at the moment, well, who could blame me? While it would have been easy to just run away and write him off based on the confusing sequence of feelings I had experienced, I resolved that I was not going to do it until he told me himself what had happened and I judged for myself whether what I felt was forgivable or not.

As I lay in my bed, surrounded by Eric's love for me – which gradually made the feelings I had awakened to seem like a distant dream – I realized that the only way I was going to understand Eric – and possibly learn to trust him – was going to be to spend time with him and get to know him. The real Eric.

While I couldn't guarantee yet that I would still love the 'new' Eric as much the Eric I had fallen for in the little bubble we had shared the last few days, I owed it to myself to see what happened if I gave him a chance.

If Pam called me back, maybe I could even call him and we could talk before he fell asleep for the day.

**~*E&S*~**

Pam never called me back.

I had stayed in bed until I knew Eric had gone to his day sleep and then drifted off for a little while longer, emotionally wrung out.

Sunlight was just coming through my window when I woke up again, and after checking to make sure Eric was still soundly out for the day, I had shrugged into a robe against the October chill and padded my way downstairs.

I was standing in the kitchen near the coffee maker just a short while later when I felt it – there was someone in the woods behind the house. I had just poured myself a cup of fresh coffee, and my hand stilled where it was as I 'listened.'

"_Goddamn, is it cold out here. Wonder if Sookie is up yet. Do I smell coffee? Damn, wish I could have me a cup." _

I rolled my eyes and crossed my kitchen, unlocking the back door and stepping out onto my back porch. It _was _cold, and I hugged myself against the brisk morning air.

"Alcide Herveaux! Come out of those trees and get some coffee before you freeze to death!" I yelled in the direction where I could hear the werewolf's mind.

"_Awwwww, shit…"_

Alcide came slinking out of the trees, his fall jacket turned up around his neck and big hands tucked under his armpits to stay warm.

"How long have you been out there?" I asked as he drew close to my back steps. "And what the _hell_ are you doin' lurkin' in my woods anyhow?"

He didn't even have to open his mouth to answer; I read it in his head as clear as could be. _Eric. _

"Never mind," I said, shaking my head. "I know why. Just come get your coffee and warm yourself up a bit."

"Thanks, Sookie," Alcide more or less grunted. "I've been out there since about 4 a.m., so I appreciate the offer."

"Why does Eric have you watching my house?" I asked, turning to pull a second coffee cup out of my cupboard.

"He said he was going to be gone for a few days and that he was worried about you being alone in the house after what happened the other night at that rally."

I poured the coffee and offered him milk and sugar. "Did he tell you what happened at that rally?" I asked cautiously.

"Not much, just that he had his memories back thanks to you and that a couple of vampires had been killed, so he'd have to go away to deal with that." Alcide sipped gratefully at the hot beverage and sighed with pleasure. "Damn, nothing like a good cup of coffee in the morning."

I gestured for him to sit down. "So, what, you're supposed to keep an eye on me until he gets back?" _If he gets back._ After what had happened before sunrise this morning, I was less certain of that than I had been the night before. "It's a generous thought, Alcide, but I don't know that it's really necessary," I began. "I hate to see you put out on my account. Again. And I don't suppose Debbie is going to be very happy about it."

"I'll handle Debbie, don't you worry none about that," Alcide replied. He had paused with his cup between his hands and was staring at me with a puzzled frown, his nostrils twitching the tiniest bit. "Sookie, so you're really with Eric now, huh?"

I blushed, remembering that Alcide and Debbie had seen how very _with Eric_ I had been out in the woods just a few nights before. "It's complicated," I answered shortly. "We're still working out things now that he has memories back. But yeah, we were together. The future is still kind of up in the air, though." I sipped my coffee and stared down into my cup to avoid meeting his brown eyes.

When I glanced up again, Alcide was still looking strangely at me and this time he leaned forward and took a deliberately deep whiff of air before making a kind of growling noise. "What did he do to you?" he demanded roughly. "You smell different."

Oh, these damned werewolves and their damned sensitive noses. "Alcide, you of all people should know what he _did to me_," I said drily. "Isn't there some kind of werewolf etiquette about bringing it up, though? 'Cause I gotta tell you, having you mention how I _smell _after being with someone is kind of embarrassing –" I grumbled.

"I'm not talking about sex," Alcide cut me off, shaking his dark head. "No, Sookie, when I say you smell different, I mean you smell kind of like – " He sniffed at me again and paused as if rolling the scent around inside his nose to look for its nuances. "You smell like a mixture of you and vampire. Eric give you a lot of his blood or something?"

_What the hell?_ "No," I answered cautiously. "He gave me a little bit at one point, but not a _lot._" Not enough to make me smell like a vampire, I thought. Unless there was something different that happened when a human exchanged blood with a vampire the way we had? Something that only happened with the blued-festa thing?

Well. Dammit.

"You sure he didn't give you more than you realized?" Alcide asked. "'Cause I'm tellin' you, Sookie, you smell kinda like a V addict or something." He stopped and a faint blush crept up his cheeks. "Uh, not that I mean that I think that you _are_ one or anything," he added stumblingly, as if suddenly aware of how bad what he had just said might sound. Judging from the curse words going through his head, he _did_ know how it sounded.

I sighed and took another sip of my coffee as I considered whether or not to tell Alcide about the blood exchange. Somehow, it seemed like a really private thing, at least until Eric and I had sorted out where we stood with each other. "Well, Eric's got _really_ old blood," I finally said. "Maybe it just doesn't take that much for it to be noticeable in my system." I shrugged casually.

As worried as I had been just an hour or two earlier about Eric's ability to lie, I seemed to be doing a mighty fine job of it myself. But just _a white lie_, I told myself. _And what Eric and I do together is not really Alcide's business_, I thought defensively.

I guess Eric wasn't the only big faker when it came to telling the truth.

"Huh," Alcide grunted. "_Could _be the age of his blood, I suppose." He gulped another hot swallow of coffee.

"You want some eggs or something?" I offered, hoping to distract him. "I imagine you are about due for breakfast, too."

"Sure," Alcide said, "I'd appreciate that." He took another sip of his coffee and swirled it in his cup before speaking again. "Uh, Sookie? What's your plan for today? Because Eric spelled out that he wanted me to stick close by you until he got back." He looked apologetically at me. "I know you're not going to be a fan of it, but I'm not going to cross him on this. He made it pretty damn clear that he wasn't going to be happy if I did." The particular remembered threat that crossed Alcide's mind was perversely creative.

I wrinkled my nose in disgust. "Ewwwwww. No wonder you were out in my woods half the night. You do know that I wouldn't let him do that to you, though, right?"

"Well, I'd rather not give him the opportunity to even think of following through," Alcide replied. "And he's going to make up my lost pay, so it's not like I'm suffering any by spending time in your company. Especially if you are willing to rustle me up a hot breakfast." The corner of his mouth quirked up in a half smile.

"Well, I need to work the dinner shift tonight, but nothing but housework and errands on the agenda until then," I said, standing up to put my coffee cup in the sink and get a pan out for breakfast. "So, if you really want to hang out, you're free to do it. You can watch some TV or something, and if you want to go along with me to the store, that would be fine, too. I should probably get some Halloween candy to leave in a bowl on the porch for tonight since I won't be home." As I was getting out eggs and bacon from the fridge, I had another thought. "Hey, Alcide – if Eric called you to come over here, you have his number, right?"

"Yeah," Alcide answered. "What, your boyfriend didn't give you his cell phone number before he left?" He frowned at me.

Referring to Eric as my _boyfriend_ was a whole new concept I was going to have to think about, but I didn't want to talk about it with Alcide of all people, so I just let the term slide by without commenting.

"There wasn't enough time," I answered, laying the bacon out in the pan. "As far as I know, he didn't even have a phone when he left yesterday. I guess he replaced it on the road. I don't have the new number and I'd like to call him when I get a chance."

"Uh, he didn't tell you he wouldn't have phone service where he's going?"

I turned at that. "What? No, is that what he told you?" Damn, damn, damn.

"Yeah, someone else told him that he shouldn't count on service when he got to wherever he was going. That's why he called me when he did, wanted to make sure things were in place for you in case he was out of touch." The furrow in his brow deepened. "And he didn't let you know that, either?"

"Probably not enough time," I repeated. I wasn't about to explain to Alcide about the fight Eric and I had had before he left or that I'd asked Eric to give me some space. Those details still felt like oversharing, especially given that Alcide seemed to have such mixed feelings about Eric already.

"Pam's phone must not be working, either," I thought out loud. "I tried calling her this morning and it said she had no service. Must be that wherever it is that they've gone blocks phone signals." Suddenly the bond, as annoying as some aspects could be, seemed like a gift. I couldn't have stood not knowing at all whether or not Eric was okay. Who takes phone access away for any _good_ purpose? I shivered.

"Fucking vampires," Alcide muttered. "Don't even trust their own. What kind of social system is that?" he grumbled.

"Well, I haven't noticed that humans are much better," I said, pouring myself another cup of coffee as the bacon began to pop with heat.

"Other supes sometimes give us wolves shit, but at least we got pack," Alcide said. "If you got a good pack at your back, you can always count on having someone in your corner."

"And your new pack is a good one?" I asked, sipping more of my coffee. I knew Alcide had had a bad experience after his old pack had fallen prey to Russell Edgington's control.

Alcide sighed. "Honestly, jury is still out on that. Packs are only as good as their pack master and I haven't made up my mind about this one yet." He leaned back in his chair. "But I still stand by the _idea_ of pack as a good one. Better than vamps and their every-one-for-themselves attitudes."

"Well, given that you're sitting here in my kitchen because of a vamp who wanted you to keep me safe, I think they aren't all like that. At least, not all the time," I said pointedly.

Alcide begrudgingly shrugged his agreement. "Well, maybe Eric is an exception. It isn't like this is the first time he's had me keeping an eye on you. Besides during the thing with Russell Edgington, I mean."

"What?" I looked at him in surprise. "What do you mean by that?"

"He had me out here at your house just after you disappeared," Alcide answered. "I was only out here for a couple of days before I had to get back to Jackson, but I heard he had a bunch of locals keeping an eye on the house right up until the holidays that year. I guess he hoped that you would show up at some point, or that maybe there would be some clue about what happened to you." Alcide snorted. "And no disrespect meant, Sookie, but if you were on business for Bill, couldn't he have let Eric know that?" He shook his head in disgust.

Gosh, how many other lies I'd told were going to come back to haunt me this morning? There seemed to be some sort of karmic message in that.

"Yeah, well, you know vampires," I replied, "They're not the best communicators_." Even when you could feel their feelings. _ I sighed.

Alcide's brown eyes narrowed at me. "So, even though you and Eric were together, you haven't talked about him looking out for you while you were gone yet?"

"No, there hasn't been –"

"—been enough time," Alcide finished for me. "I know it's none of my business, but sounds to me like you and Eric need to talk more." He shook his head and slurped from his coffee cup.

"Can't disagree with you," I answered with a shake of my own head. This morning's incident was proof, to my mind, that not being in contact with Eric while still knowing what he felt – but not the context of those feelings – was a bad idea. No, we _did_ need to talk more. And if we couldn't do it by phone while he was gone, then we would talk in person as soon as he got back, I resolved.

_If_ he got back.

Stuffing down my worry for Eric, I focused on the were my _'boyfriend'_ had sent to be my bodyguard in his stead. While I hoped it would turn out to be unnecessary, I was actually touched that Eric had wanted to protect me even after I'd sent him packing the way I had. And it was kind of nice to have the company to keep me distracted until I could check in with Eric through the bond later tonight. Even though I knew Eric was in his day sleep, I sent a little wave of gratitude towards him and again was surprised to feel a tiny thrum of faint response through the bond.

_Huh. _

Yeah, we definitely needed to talk more, including about this weird connection between us. I was beginning to think that Eric really _didn't_ know much more about it than I did. And that made me a little nervous for both of us.

But I couldn't do anything about that right now. I'd get that phone number from Alcide and try Eric later, even if it sounded like it might not get through.

"So, how do you want your eggs?" I asked Alcide brightly. "Sunny side up or scrambled?"

And when Alcide gave me some answer that barely registered, I realized that I could hide my real feelings just as well as any vampire I knew.

**A/N: Just reminding you that since you are reading this from Sookie's POV, she sometimes has wrong ideas about things she doesn't (yet) know about – including what kind of vamps make up the Authority. It made sense to me that she would assume that the vampires in the Authority were probably all older and more powerful than Eric. What a surprise she is in for…**


	6. Chapter 6: Visitations

**A/N: Just a reminder that, in my story, Debbie wasn't involved in the search for Eric at all. She and Alcide are still together, although she is unhappy about how often he has gotten caught up in "Sookie's vamp shit." **

**Chapter 6: Visitations**

I had honestly expected Alcide to just park himself in front of my TV all day while I did what I had to at home, but I guess I should have known better. He got bored pretty quickly with the morning shows, so I had ended up asking him to help me out while I cleaned up Eric's cubby. Not only was he able to help me by getting the vacuum cleaner down that darned ladder, but he took the nasty pile of gore-encrusted silver chains that were still beside Eric's bed and spent some time washing them off outside with a hose and a scrub-brush. There wasn't all that much to do in Eric's cubby besides give everything a good suctioning, but I did make sure the throw and pillow on the bed were straightened out and I dusted the pile of books on the bedside table.

I hadn't really had a chance to look at them while Eric was staying with me, but I couldn't resist now, curious to see what kind of things Eric Northman would read. I had never really thought of Eric as a reader, so I had been surprised when I had seen the big stack of volumes piled beside the bed. And I knew they weren't just for show – I remembered how, the first time I had actually entered the cubby, one of the books had been lying open on the bed as if it had just been put down. All I could figure was that Eric must have been spending time in his little hideaway beneath my house while I was gone to Faerie, entertaining himself by reading.

A few days ago, I would have been nothing but outraged at the thought of him lollygagging in my house, making himself at home, but now – now, I wondered what the books he been reading could tell me about the Eric I didn't know so well yet.

The first thing I learned was that the 'real' Eric must read several different languages. Only a couple of the books were in English, and one of them in a very old form of it at that, with weird spellings and those strange-looking _s_'s that looked like lower-case _f'_s to me. I recognized one book in French and another in German, but the rest of the languages were mysteries to me.

Fortunately, a lot of the books had illustrations and I was able to tell that most of them had something to do with faeries, including lots of pictures of what looked like dazed and dreamy-eyed humans surrounded by fae as if they had been lured away to Faerieland as I had. There was even a picture of a faerie offering a human an enticing piece of fruit that gave me chills because it looked so much like the deceptive "light fruit" I had been offered.

As I flipped through the books, my eye caught some parts where someone – presumably Eric – had underlined passages and written notes in the margin in a precise, printed hand. "_Eating or drinking in Fae = __trap_," read one, the final word underlined twice. Another took the form of a question: "_Portals between dimensions – but how to access if not fae? Light? Water? Blood?_" Still another underlined a passage that my high school French told me translated as being about a man who had spent _several hundred years_ in Fae before returning home to his village. I didn't know the word written in the margin beside that story, but it was scratched hard and fast into the page, deep enough to have nearly torn through the paper with the pen tip, as if Eric was upset when he wrote it. Maybe a curse word?

The largest book was written in what looked like some sort of Scandinavian alphabet, to judge from the little dots and slashes over and through some of the letters. The obviously ancient book fell open naturally to a page with what looked like one of those late medieval woodcut illustrations on it. In the drawing, a man and a woman – no, a male and female vampire – were shown naked and erotically entwined, the female's legs wrapped around the male's hips and her breasts prominently exposed. I blushed, thinking it must be some sort of vampire erotica, until I noticed an odd little detail: the lovers each had the other's wrist pressed to their mouths, apparently feeding on one another, faces drawn in ecstasy as blood dripped from the mutual wounds. Above them were drawn three little symbols that looked like crescent moons. Beneath the illustration was the word "_Blóðfesta."_

I may not have been able to read whatever language it was written in, but the word looked similar to how the word that Eric kept using sounded, and the drawing was – well, the drawing looked suspiciously like what Eric and I had done when we exchanged blood. Well, except that we'd been dressed for the actual blood swapping part.

I flipped a few pages before and after the drawing and as best as I could make out, there were only a couple of pages that talked about the _blóðfesta_ and, of course, I couldn't read a word beyond the single one that looked familiar. The rest of the book had other illustrations of both humans and vampires drinking blood, and at least one of a vampire apparently coming to the rescue of a human who was being attacked by someone else. I was still trying to puzzle out what that might be about when I heard the sound of the back door opening and closing and Alcide's heavy work boots as he walked through the house.

"Sook? You okay down there?" Alcide called from the stop of the ladder into the cubby. I could hear him worrying mentally that he might have been outside too long and missed someone coming in from the other side of the house.

I hastily closed the big old book and put it on the bottom shelf, piling a couple of the smaller volumes on top of it.

"Yup, just got distracted for a minute," I called up. "Can you help me get the vacuum back up the ladder? I'm all done down here."

"Sure thing," he answered. "I got those chains all cleaned off and I'm just letting them dry outside." He came down the ladder for the first time, looking around curiously. "So, this is where Eric stayed while he was with you? I guess it ain't too bad for an underground hidey-hole." He snorted. "Nothing but books to keep him entertained, though? Huh, wouldn't have thought Northman was much of a reader."

"You'd be surprised," I said, tugging the vacuum towards the ladder. Alcide picked the cleaning machine up easily and began to climb back up the rungs with it dangling from one large hand. I cast one more thoughtful look back at the books beside the bed before following him back up through the chute. When Alcide wasn't around anymore, I wanted to spend some more time looking through those books.

**~*E&S*~**

Alcide had trailed around after me like a lost puppy for the day as I cleaned and ran errands at the store, with the were taking phone calls every now and again from what I knew was an increasingly irritated Debbie Pelt. I honestly thought about sending Alcide home to his suspicious girlfriend, but the truth was, after the amount of worry for my safety I'd felt from Eric the night before, I didn't want to take unnecessary chances. If Eric Northman was concerned for my safety, I should be, too. Debbie could take it up with her man when he got home.

If I was a little nervous for me, it was nothing to the increasing worry I felt for Tara. As upset as I was about what she had done to Eric, I couldn't help but think about what it must be like for her to be held prisoner by the vampire authorities. While it was daylight, I was pretty sure nothing would happen to her, but as the sun moved across the sky, I kept thinking about what might happen to her after sunset. Eric had said there would be some kind of trial, but I suspected that vampires weren't big on lengthy hearings, especially when it came to humans who had killed vampires – especially important ones. And what kind of sentence would the vampires impose on her? Nothing I could think of sounded like a good outcome for Tara.

Alcide could tell I was getting more tense as the day went on, but he thought it had to do with my being nervous about what could happen to _me_ once the sun went down and vampires were awake. Since I was the only human who still remembered what had happened at the tolerance rally and Tara's involvement, I didn't want to put Alcide in more danger by sharing that knowledge, so I just kept my mouth shut. Alcide was already putting himself at enough risk by agreeing to keep an eye on me while Eric was gone.

Given what Alcide had told me about Eric probably not being able to call me until he left wherever he was, I also found myself genuinely grateful for the connection I had with my recent lover. I know that people say vampires die for the day, but that really wasn't what it felt like to me. I could still feel Eric, his unconscious presence like a quiet, steady little hum that I could still have identified as _him_ in a way I couldn't explain.

And as it drew nearer to sunset, I realized that I was kind of torn with anxiety about what would happen when Eric did wake up. Part of me was looking forward to feeling him fully awake again, and while I told myself it was just because I desperately wanted to know what was going on with Tara, if I was going to be honest with myself, that wasn't my only motivation. Despite my fear that I might feel something hurtful from him again – and believe me, despite the apologetic and reassuring feelings from him I had experienced that morning, some part of me was still afraid of that – I still found myself missing him. I didn't know if that was the bond in me or just that the part of me that loved some part of him, but it was there.

By the time I had to leave for work at Merlotte's I was nearly beside myself with nervous anticipation about what would happen that night, but in my mind, it all had to do with what was going on in the seat of vampire power, wherever the hell that was. (Somewhere to the southeast of me, to judge by the direction my connection with Eric tugged me in.)

I should have known that Halloween in Bon Temps would bring enough problems of its own.

**~*E&S*~**

Sam had encouraged us all to dress in costume for the holiday and one of the errands I had done with Alcide that day was to pick out a costume I thought would be fun but not too skimpy for work. It took me a while, but I finally did find something that I thought would work: a simple white A-line sheath dress, covered with big, colorful dots like a Twister board, with a cute little matching spinner on a headband so that I could wear it like a hat. What could be more harmless than dressing like a board game?

It wasn't very far into my shift before I realized that the Twister dress had been a _bad_ idea, at least for a telepathic waitress.

Apparently, the dress with the matching spinner hat provoked an intense desire on the part of some of the customers – mostly men, but some women, too – to spin the little gizmo and then place their hands (or feet!) on one of the dots on my dress according to the hat's directions. Unfortunately, with the slim cut of the dress, most of those dots were on places like my hips, my butt, my thighs or my boobs. No one actually _tried_ to touch me except for one four-year-old dressed as a fireman but I could hear the variations on the thought repeatedly. "Right hand on blue…hip or boob? I'd go with hip …"

The worst were the ones who fantasized putting their hands on the big yellow dot centered right over the front of my panties. Just, _ick._

I guess I should have followed Alcide's lead and just bought a cowboy hat.

At least I wasn't the only one in a costume. Holly was done up as a fairy (the dress wasn't actually wasn't too far off the real thing, if you ignored the wings) and Arlene was some kind of zombie. Sam hadn't bothered to dress up himself, but Lafayette had more than made up for him by wearing a shiny green evening gown, a low-browed, long dark wig, and an apron, all of which he said made him one of those reality show New Jersey housewives. It was busier than a normal evening at Merlotte's, at least early on, thanks to families stopping in to feed their kids on the way to parties or trick-or-treating. It was fun to see the little ones dressed up, including Sam's girlfriend's daughter, who was one of a veritable army of Disney princesses out and about.

The good thing about the relatively festive mood was that it did give me something else to think about other than worrying about Eric and Tara. And while I'm not normally a fan of vampire glamouring, I felt guiltily relieved that Lafayette didn't remember anything about what Tara had done and what she was facing. He was happily cooking up a storm in the kitchen, talking mockingly in a fake "New Joisey" accent as his called out completed orders.

It was just short of 6:15 when I finally felt Eric wake up. Although I had been expecting it, I was caught off guard at first because it was still a good ten minutes before sunset in Bon Temps, but then it occurred to me that if he was down to my southeast, the sun was going to rise and set a little earlier than where I was. Just to see if it might be possible later to figure out where he was by the clue of when he woke up, I jotted down the time on my order pad and stuck the sheet in my pocket as I ran to pick up my order.

And I guess whatever it was compelling me to long for the full connection with Eric must have been the same on his end, because the first thing I felt when he came to – from both of us – was a tremendous sense of relief and a kind of satisfied pleasure that the bond was flowing between us. It was like a knot I had been carrying in me all day loosened once he was awake and it helped me relax just a bit.

Since I was in the busiest part of dinner service, there wasn't a lot of time to be standing around paying attention to my inner feelings, so I just turned my mind back to getting my work done, satisfied that I would now know if there was anything worth knowing tonight. Eric must have been similarly content with what he found in checking in on me. I was sure he could detect my nervousness, because I could feel the reassurance he sent my way, but as soon as I acknowledged it, his mood quickly turned to one of focus and determination.

In between orders, I kept checking in with Eric to see if I could tell what was going on, but the only thing I picked up as the time ticked by was an increasing sense of his boredom and irritation. Apparently, not a whole lot was happening in the stronghold of the Authority. Was that good or bad?

I was so focused on trying to figure out what that big ol' sea of nothing meant that I missed it when Lafayette first started acting weird.

It was Holly who brought it to my attention after Lafayette dropped a bowl of gumbo for one of her tables. After she had rushed behind the counter to help him clean up the mess and get another bowl ready to go, she had muttered to me in passing, "I don't know if it's that waning full moon or the veil being so thin tonight, but something has Lafayette spooked. That's the third fumble he's had in the last hour or so."

"The 'veil being so thin?'" I had asked, bewildered. "What do you mean?"

"Aww, honey, Halloween isn't just a night for trick or treating and parties. In Wicca, it's supposed to be the night of the year when the veil between the worlds is thinnest. The spirits are out and about tonight. Makes me jumpy." Holly didn't say it out loud, but I heard her thinking, _"Like whatever the hell that was that took over Marnie for that spell the other night. No thanks, I'm not opening the door any time soon to any spirits I don't know enough about. Screw that shit."_

I glanced at Lafayette, who was muttering under his breath in the kitchen. Sam had looked over when the dish had clattered, but was tied up tending the bar. My boss nodded at me as if to encourage me to go check on Lafayette in his stead. "I don't mind asking how Laf is doin'," I said to Holly. "You go, your table is waitin' for that gumbo."

I went around the counter right into the kitchen to talk to Lafayette, whose easy relaxation from earlier in the evening seemed to have disappeared. "Lafayette? Everything okay in here?"

The cook's dark eyes glanced at me and I could see how miserable he was. He stole a look out into the dining room before leaning over and saying to me in a low voice, "Fuck, Sook, if this is what you go through every motherfuckin' day, it is a wonder you ain't _totally_ fucked-up crazy. The non-stop talkin' is drivin' me batshit."

It took me a minute to realize what he was talking about because I just wasn't used to Lafayette's new ability as a medium. "You mean…_spirits_?" I hissed at him. "You can hear them?"

The beautifully made-up eyes rolled. "Motherfuckin' dead folk apparently can _not_ shut the fuck _up_," he growled. "And not just hearin' them, either. They is all around tonight, getting' in my way." He raised his voice and said a little more loudly, but still not loud enough to be heard in the dining room. "I gots a job to do tonight, people, so why don't y'all just fuck off to the cemetery or whatever else you supposed to be doin' on Halloween night." He waved the spatula in his hand menacingly at the air. "Get on outta my kit-chen!"

"Holly said that the veil between worlds is thin tonight," I said. "So maybe this is just a Halloween-only kind of thing," I suggested, trying to be comforting.

"I sure as shit hope so," Lafayette said, scraping his metal spatula on the grill. "Because I am goddamn tired of it being like _Grand Central_ fucking _Station_ in here." His voice was rising again and I knew it wasn't me that he was really talking to.

I had a sudden horrible thought. What if something happened to Tara tonight thanks to the vampires and she – well, her spirit – showed up to say goodbye to her cousin?

"Lafayette," I said tentatively. "Is Jesús stopping by tonight? Maybe he'll have some ideas on how to hush the spirits up, him being a witch and all."

Lafayette shrugged. "He was going to do some offerings to his ancestors or something tonight, but he might be by later," he answered.

I touched Lafayette on the arm and was instantly bombarded with what he was hearing in his head. _"Please, tell my sister Mama and I are waiting for her." "If my husband doesn't wrap up those rose bushes of mine for the winter, I'm going to be haunting him until the day he dies, I swear." "My daughter needs to bear a message to my son." "Tell my brother I didn't mean to. I just wasn't thinking straight."_ I jerked my hand back, overwhelmed. "Oh my God, Lafayette," I said, concerned. "No wonder you're all rattled. That's _way _worse than what I go through 'cause it sounds like they're all trying to talk _to you_, all at once! Please, please call Jesús and ask him to come over soon, see if he can help."

With a sigh, Lafayette pulled out his cell phone and started to dial. "Fine, if _you_ sayin' it ain't gonna get better than this unless I try somethin', I gots to take that seriously."

Sam appeared at the counter. "Everything okay, Sookie?" My boss looked to me, since Lafayette was on the phone.

"I'll let Lafayette fill you in when he gets a chance," I answered. "But he's asking Jesús to come on over and hang out for a bit to, well, calm his nerves, I guess."

Sam frowned at first, as if confused, but then looked thoughtful. "I guess I can see still being skittish after what happened the other night at that rally in Shreveport. Getting to be that you can't go anywhere without some haters trying to make their hate known." He shook his head. "Lafayette," he said as soon as the cook was off the phone, "You let me know if you want to close up the kitchen early or anything. Dinner hour is winding up, and people aren't going to live or die if they don't have their onion rings tonight."

"Thanks, Sam," Lafayette nodded gratefully. "But I'll be fine. Jesús is coming by in a bit. Might help things _settle down_." He shot a dark, sideways look around the kitchen.

I was relieved that, whatever Jesús was doing with the spirits of his ancestors on Halloween night, he was going to come help Lafayette deal with his own ghosts. Especially if one of them turned out to be someone we all knew and loved, I thought anxiously.

Eric

I was bored. When I'd risen with the sunset, my first thought had been to check in on Sookie, but as far as I could tell, she was fine. Slightly worried off and on, but not intensely so, although I suspected she was keeping busy to keep her anxiety at bay.

I should be so lucky. Except for the delivery of a heated carafe of blood ("collected from willing donors," I had been assured by the guard who delivered it), I hadn't seen another soul since I rose. The guard had told me that I'd be called when I was required and that in the meanwhile, I could entertain myself in my room.

The accommodations were nice enough, but the fact that I couldn't leave it didn't make it any less of a prison, no matter how attractive the furnishings.

The only books to be had were a couple of recent best-selling vampire autobiographies – which were pointless to read, as no intelligent vampire would commit the uncensored truth of his history to print – and some recent fiction. One of the books was frankly erotic, but even that didn't hold my interest, as erotica made me think of Sookie and dwelling on thoughts of Sookie made me tense up with anxiety about keeping her out of the clutches of my fellow vampires.

The offerings on TV were not much better, although I was at least able to catch up on the "official" version of what happened at the Shreveport tolerance rally. Numerous talking heads, both human and vampire, were reporting in solemn tones on the tragic death of the late Nan Flanagan, recapping what was known about her 816 years of life. I snorted at some of the highlights being disseminated by the Authority as part of Nan's official biography. Only humans would be gullible enough to believe Nan Flanagan was actually her given name, to start with, although I could imagine her marching with suffragettes before World War I as was claimed.

While they were acknowledging that the AVL representative had died at the rally, I noticed that they were still claiming to be "investigating" the circumstances of her death. There was talk of "persons of interest" being interviewed, but no mention of Tara Thornton being arrested, and while speculation about a "rogue anti-vampire terrorist" was a favorite theory, no official conclusion had been reached by "the authorities."

I was watching Nancy Grace hold forth angrily on a conspiracy theory about what might have happened to Nan – a personal friend of the TV host and frequent guest on the show, when expertise concerning vampire hate crimes was required – when the guard knocked and opened the door to my room. "Sheriff Northman, Chancellor Kader is here to speak with you."

I flicked off the television as the Chancellor entered my room and stood to bow with the proper deference due someone of her position. "Catching up on the news?" she said lightly. "Naturally, we're not sharing all the details of the story until we're certain what the story will _be._" She crossed to a pair of heavily cushioned chairs set to one side of the room and lowered herself gracefully into one. "Come join me, Sheriff." She gestured with an elegant hand towards the other seat. "I apologize if the seats are not entirely suitable for someone of your size. Obviously, we are not all Vikings." She smiled wryly.

"No problem," I said shortly, folding myself into the chair, which was, indeed, a little low in the seat for someone with legs as long as mine. I clasped my hands together loosely and leaned forward to rest my elbows on my thighs.

Protocol demanded that I remain silent until spoken to in this situation, so I sat, my own gaze carefully neutral, as I felt her dark eyes study me for an unnervingly long time. "I have spent the time since we rose this evening with Miss Tara Thornton," she finally said. "I thought it wise to debrief the witness before any of us spoke in official capacity at the trial so that there were no…unexpected surprises." She paused and leaned towards me slightly. "Miss Thornton was very forthcoming about her motivations in killing Nan Flanagan, Sheriff. She does not seem to be someone who is … _capable_ … of keeping her own counsel in the best of circumstances, and when glamoured, she was like a –" She sought the right words and I was reminded that however smooth her English was now, it was not Theodora Kader's native tongue. "—like a _broken dam _pouring forth information."

Fuck. If Tara had been glamoured, she had probably confessed that she had ended Nan in order to protect Sookie. I should have found a way to glamour Tara myself before she was arrested. I should have ripped _her_ tongue out instead of wasting my energies on that fucking witch–

My entwined fingers tightened slightly even as I tried to hide the desperation suddenly choking me.

Chancellor Kader sighed. "So, Sheriff Northman," she said gently, "Please tell me about Sookie Stackhouse. And why you would so in explicably risk yourself to protect her, even from the highest of vampire authorities. "

Sookie

I admit, I didn't really relax again until Jesús came in the door and headed straight for the kitchen to Lafayette. As the two men had a whispered exchange in the kitchen, someone else came in the door, someone I was way less excited to see: Debbie Pelt, dressed in a too-short miniskirt and sheer top over a barely-there bra. I figured (rather cattily, I admit) that while me wearing something like that would indicate I was dressing up as a streetwalker for Halloween, on Debbie, it was just normal going-out-to-the-bar clothes.

Alcide didn't look happy, but Debbie gave me a big, bright, fake-as-can-be smile and waved at me as she headed towards the pool table where her fiancé was playing a pick-up game with some other guys. I returned an equally-as-phony smile back at her and made a note to myself to tell Eric that next time he wanted to hire a bodyguard for me, it needed to be someone without a crazy-jealous were girlfriend who insisted on checking up on him at all hours. God only knew what we were going to do if Alcide's job "babysitting" me wasn't done by closing time tonight, and to judge by the boredom and irritation on Eric's end of the bond, that seemed like a real possibility.

Jesús came around to the dining room and settled himself in at the bar as Sam poured him a beer, and I came on over to say hi, now that that the dinner traffic was finally starting to slow down.

The witch smiled at my Twister costume but then said, "I don't imagine _that_ has worked out quite the way you planned, Sookie. Even I'm wondering what I would end up touching if I spun that dial on your head." He shook his head in sympathy.

I rolled my eyes. "You have _no_ idea." I glanced around. "You think if I took the spinner off, it might get people's minds off of putting their hands all over me? Looks like it's quieting down some, so we're not likely to get any more kids in this time of night and that's really who I was doing it for." I tugged the elastic hatband off my head with relief and then smiled at Jesús. "I'm so glad you came," I said. "Lafayette tell you what was going on?"

Jesús's smile faded. "Yes, and I feel like a fool for not realizing that this might not be the best night for a medium to be out and about in public, especially such a new one as Lafayette. At least if Lala was home, we might not catch so much attention in the spirit world. Have to keep that in mind for next year."

"Is there anything you can do to help him?" I asked, frowning with concern. "I heard what is going on in his head, Jesús, and I don't think he's going to get much peace with all that racket. Can you maybe do a spell or something?"

Jesús sipped at his beer and then said, "Already did what little I could in a public place, Sookie. My cute-as-a-button New Jersey housewife is now sprinkled with salt and a blessing. It should at least keep the malevolent spirits away for the rest of the evening. It won't shut every spirit up entirely, but it should dim the noise a little." He played with the base of his beer glass. "You have more experience with mental barriers than I do, though, you know. Maybe when we have some time, we can all get together and you can work with him a little on building up his strength that way? Obviously, we can't do much tonight, but I want him to be able to live with this gift, the way you've learned to live with yours."

I snorted. "Oh, I don't know about that. The 'living with it' thing, not the helping thing, I mean." I fiddled with the spinner on my hat, which I had placed flat on the bar. "You know I'll be happy to work with Lafayette on building up his shields, though." And then I had a thought. Maybe Jesús could help me – well, me _and _Eric – figure out the magical details of our bond. "And maybe, you can help me with something, too? Nothing I can tell you about right now, but maybe we can help each other?"

"You know it, Sookie," Jesús said, sipping at his beer again. He glanced at Lafayette, who was flipping something on the grill, and then looked back at me, his expression suddenly very solemn. _"Have you heard anything yet about what the vampires might decide to do with Tara?"_ he _thought _at me.

I sucked my breath in and then leaned in to say, very softly so that no one else would hear, "No. Nothing yet." I stared at him, concerned. "I thought you weren't supposed to _remember_ any of that," I commented cautiously. I had been right there when Pam had glamoured Jesús and Bill had glamoured Lafayette into forgetting what had happened at the tolerance rally – or so both vampires had believed. If anyone in the Vampire Authority knew that any humans had walked out of the Dorchester Hotel with their memories of that night intact, it would be _bad_.

"_The glamour didn't take,"_ Jesús thought at me. _"I don't know why. I'm not telling anyone but you I remember, though, not even Lafayette." _His eyes went to his boyfriend again, his expression sad and protective. _"I don't want him upset about Tara until he has to be. He wouldn't be able to function."_ His eyes shifted to me again. _"But I don't know why the glamour didn't work." _"Maybe that is something we can figure out, too, when we work on the stuff with Lafayette," he said out loud.

"Anything you need," I said. I licked my lips, thinking back to my earlier fear for Lafayette, that he might learn Tara was dead by seeing her spirit. "And if Lafayette gets any…_news _about Tara before _I_ do, will you let _me_ know?"

Jesús swore in Spanish under his breath. "I hadn't even thought of that possibility," he said grimly. "Yeah, I'll keep you informed."

I caught sight of the people at Table 2 trying to get my attention and gave Jesús a consoling pat on the back as I went to see what they needed.

Whatever Jesús had done with the salt must have done something because Lafayette's light mood was back and he was swaying the glittering hips of his costume to some beat in his head as he cooked.

**~*E&S*~**

Not too long after Jesús and I had talked, Eric got worried for me. _Very _worried. I tensed up, unsure of how I ought to react at first, but I finally decided that so long as Eric wasn't sending me some kind of message like "Run, run!" I was just going to sit tight. Especially since I was beginning to realize that Eric seemed to spend _a lot_ of time worrying about me. Since I didn't know if he felt this way about me in general or whether I really had good reason to be concerned, I wasn't sure how to feel about that. Another question to add to my list of "things to talk to Eric about" when I saw him again. If I saw him again.

The worried feeling from Eric eased up a bit after a while, but never totally went away. I couldn't tell Alcide what I was feeling without revealing to him the way that Eric and I had bonded, but I did make a point of stopping by the pool table where Alcide was hanging out with Debbie with a couple of beers I had paid for out of my own pocket. I had thanked both of them for spending their evening keeping an eye on me, being especially nice to Debbie about it, although she wasn't officially part of Eric's arrangement.

Not that my gesture had made much of an impact on Debbie after her initial gratitude for the free beer.

Alcide had taken a break from the pool table to sit at a table with his girlfriend, but their conversation hadn't looked very happy from a distance. I stayed the heck out of both of their heads, but I could tell from Debbie's body language that she was getting impatient with staying at the bar, especially after Alcide had switched from beer to soda, I assume to keep his wits about him in case he really did end up having to protect me from someone or something. I would have loved to tell Alcide to just go on home with Debbie so I didn't have to deal with her sulking, but with Eric worried for me, I was feeling selfish enough not to want to risk it. Hopefully the worry on Eric's part was a sign that at least _something_ was happening where he was and he'd be back sooner rather than later.

Things finally came to a head with my "bodyguard" and his girlfriend when we started to close up just before midnight. Jesús had gone into the kitchen with Lafayette, and Holly had already left, telling Sam that she wanted to be home a little early to make sure her boys hadn't gotten into any Halloween mischief.

I had stopped by Alcide's table and told him that he was welcome to sack out in my guest room for the night if he wanted to, rather than lurk around outside the house. I figured it would be more comfortable for him, and my thinking was that if Debbie knew about the sleeping arrangements upfront, she'd realize that I had no designs on her man.

I should have known that having Alcide anywhere in my house – more comfortable for him or not – wouldn't fly with her. She didn't say anything while I was there, but no sooner was I across the room wiping down tables before I could hear the were couple begin to bicker.

"Well, I don't know why you have to go home with her," Debbie was hissing at Alcide at their table. I would like to think that she wasn't aware I could hear her, but I wouldn't want to bet money on it. "You've been with her _all fucking day_, Alcide."

"And I told Eric Northman I would not leave her alone until he got back from his business," Alcide had replied stubbornly. At least he was trying to keep his voice down.

"Oh, and you owe a _vamp_ this much time out of your day, no matter _what_ he pays you? Where is your self-respect, Alcide?" Debbie shook her auburn hair in disgust.

"Don't forget he sent work my way last year when he didn't need to," Alcide responded with a low growl. "And this isn't about Eric Northman, it's about keeping my _friend _Sookie out of trouble."

"Oh, yeah, it's _about Sookie_, alright," Debbie muttered bitterly.

Alcide stood up and nodded towards the door. "We'll talk about this outside," he said, his voice grim. "I enjoyed having you around tonight, Debbie, but the rest of tonight is business. You need to go home."

"Fuck you, Alcide Herveaux," Debbie had spit beneath her breath as she headed for the door.

"Sook!" Alcide called to me. I looked up as if I hadn't picked up any of what they had been saying. "I'll wait outside for you after I tell Debbie goodnight."

"Alright. 'Night, Debbie, happy Halloween," I said brightly. "And thanks again for stopping by."

Debbie just flapped a hand at me in goodbye, her lips still pinched as if she was biting her tongue.

"Gonna be a long night," I sighed to Sam, picking up condiment bottles and stacking them in a tray.

"Do I even want to know why Alcide Herveaux is sending his girlfriend home and sounding like he's going to be spending the night with you?" Sam asked drily.

I squeezed another bottle of ketchup into the tray. "I was at that rally in Shreveport," I finally said. "And some of the out-of-state vampires may have picked up on my being a telepath."

Sam's face fell. "Jesus, Sook. You think some might be coming for you or something?"

I swallowed. "I hope not, but it seemed like a good idea not to take any chances. Both Eric and Bill are away dealing with the follow up of the rally, so Alcide's keeping an eye on me. Just in case."

"Follow up, huh?" Sam said with a snort. "I can just imagine what the real story is there."

"You don't want to," I said shortly, wiping down a pair of salt and peppershakers. "Trust me on that."

In the kitchen, I could hear the low rumble of Jesús and Lafayette laughing about something. It was a nice sound after the earlier worry about Lafayette's little _visitation_ problem.

Sam scrubbed at what looked like a dried sticky spot of beer on a table before saying quietly, "You going to tell me what's really going on with Lafayette?"

I bit my lip. "Well, honestly, it's not my story to tell," I answered finally. While I suspect Lafayette wouldn't mind Sam knowing about his newfound ability to communicate with the dead, it only seemed fair to let Lafayette share the news when he was ready to.

Sam stared down at a napkin holder he was wiping down with unnecessary intensity. "And what about the story that _is _yours to tell?" His soft, brown eyes rose to my face. "You should know a shifter is going to notice a change in scent, Sookie. So, what's the story with you and Eric Northman?"

"Oh, for God's sake, not you, too," I grumbled, rolling my eyes. "So does every shapeshifting supe in Renard Parish know about me and Eric by my smell?"

"So there is something to know?" Sam said, his disappointment clear on his face. "Sookie, what the hell are you thinking? Bill Compton I could kind of understand, but Eric Northman? He's a whole new level of dangerous to you." I could feel his reaction was mostly genuine worry for me. _Mostly._

"He's dangerous, all right, but not to me, Sam," I said firmly. "I'm not going to go into it with you, close as we are, because what's going on between me and Eric is still between me and Eric, but I can promise you, he's no danger to me. Not a bit." Sam regarded me doubtfully.

"Sookie!" Jesús was suddenly behind the kitchen counter, hands planted on the flat surface, face strained. "Can you come into the kitchen for a minute?" I could hear a steady stream of what sounded like cursing in Spanish from his head, so I dropped the cloth in my hand and hurried towards him, Sam right behind me.

Lafayette was standing in the kitchen, the wig from his costume clutched in a hand, his face bewildered. "This who you mean?" he said to the air in front of him. At some kind of unseen acknowledgement, his looked to me. "Sookie, somebody here is sayin' you is his daughter and he has a message for you for his son, but I know he ain't your daddy because I still remember your daddy and this sure as shit ain't him. Less he got way shorter in the afterlife." He glanced in the direction of the apparent spirit. "No offense."

I looked at Jesús, confused. "I thought you said the salt would keep spirits away from Lafayette."

"Well, bad spirits, anyhow," the witch conceded. "But this one seems real persistent. He's been hanging around all night, according to Lala, and doesn't seem to want to take 'no' for an answer. Any idea who it could be if it isn't really your father?"

I remembered how I had been able to hear my Gran's voice in Marnie's head the time I had visited the other witch in Moon Goddess Emporium. "No, but I have an idea how I might be able to find out." I reached out and took Lafayette's hand. "Lafayette, you don't even need to talk. Just let me listen in," I said to my friend. "Whoever you are, I'm listening. You say you got a message for me?" I spoke to the air.

"_Sookie,"_ the voice said in Lafayette's head. _"I do have a message for you – and for Eric."_

"_Godric?" _I blurted out loud in surprise. I squinted as I thought I saw something – no, _someone_ – standing in the kitchen in the direction that Lafayette was looking. "Oh. My. God. Godric, I can _see you_." The figure of Eric's late maker was translucent but clearly visible to me. _What in the hell?_

I felt Lafayette's hand twitch in mine. "Seriously? You see him, too? Short, young guy, dark hair?" Lafayette asked. "You a medium now, too, Sook?"

"_No,"_ Godric answered, a little smile turning up the corner of his mouth. He was a hazy, light-filled mass, standing there in Merlotte's kitchen. _"The bond you share with my son means you share one another's gifts, Sookie. He sees me; so now _you_ see me. But he doesn't always trust what he sees, and this message is too important for him to ignore. For everyone's sakes."_

Behind me, I heard Sam ask Jesús in a shocked voice, "Lafayette's a medium?"

"What message, Godric?" I asked. I'd have to ask Eric about the whole "seeing Godric" thing when I saw him; that sure as shootin' hadn't come up yet.

"_There is a change coming among vampires that will put you and Eric at risk because of the bond you have formed. You might be tempted to end your union. But I want you to understand that everything is connected, Sookie, and your bond has influence beyond the two of you." _

The ancient vampire's expression was solemn. _"I know you fear the power it has created in you, but understand that it makes the two of you stronger, both as individuals and together. And you will need that shared strength in what is to come." _

Godric's dark eyes had been compassionate as he acknowledged my fear of the bond, but then something that looked suspiciously like hope lit up his face as he continued_. "But bringing growth to the two of you is not the limit of this magic's power, Sookie. The bond between you has the potential to change _everything – for both our kinds_ – _forever_. The choice about how you will respond remains yours and Eric's, but I implore you: consider the good that can come of it for both vampire and fae and don't react to the bond out of fear. Instead, I ask you to embrace this gift you have given one another. Be brave and learn its ways. Much good – or evil – to come depends on your choice in this." _

"But, Godric," I stammered. "Even Eric didn't understand what we were getting into and he knows _way_ more about it than I do. How are we supposed to 'learn the ways' of this thing?" My tone may have sounded a little sarcastic as I imitated the gravity with which he'd said that last part, but I didn't mean to be rude. I was just baffled.

Godric nodded with understanding. _"Your people will have the answer to that, Sookie. You must seek them out. Both you and Eric must understand the roots of who you are – and who you can be." _

"By 'my people' do you mean my – my fae relatives?" I was dimly conscious of a ripple of shock among my audience of friends, but I ignored it. "Because, A, the queen closed that portal to the fae realms, for good I hope, and B, I'm not going _anywhere_ where they want to imprison me, Godric. I just _can't._ Not again!"

"_Sookie, my daughter, you don't have to go so far as you think for the answers. And both you and my son will be safe going there when the time comes, so long as you complete the bond by then," _Godric cautioned.

"Wait, complete the bond? I thought it was complete already?" My heart began to trip and somewhere to my southeast, I felt Eric detect my increased tension and react with concern.

"_Your friend the witch can indeed help you understand more about this magic,"_ Godric replied, gesturing at Jesús. _"He may not know the language in which the texts are written, but he will understand the symbols. And, Sookie –"_ Godric's eyes softened with affection. _"I am proud to claim you both you and Eric as my blood. Tell my son I am happy with his choices."_ A sadness passed over his face just then, but he said no more, turning away from Lafayette and me, only to vanish.

"Ho-ly shit," Lafayette breathed, releasing my hand. "Jesus Christ, Sookie, good thing you could hear all that directly because ain't _no _motherfuckin' way I could even _begin_ to explain all that to you." He shook his head. "And, lover," he said to Jesús, "The man want you to use your witchy skills to help Sookie find answers. "And it sound to me like it's important that you do it if even _half_ of what he said was true."

I sank against the kitchen counter, suddenly exhausted by the whole evening, my mind whirling with the message Godric had delivered. I could feel Eric, his concern for me tugging with an anxious persistence. I reassured him that I was _fine, safe_…_puzzled_ and even _awed_ by what had just happened. And in return, I felt him relax a bit, although the worried little knot of worry for me never disappeared entirely.

And while I was still disturbed by the tension I could feel nagging at me through our bond, I suddenly realized that perhaps the most important part of the message at that moment was in what Godric had _not said_ to me.

Godric had spoken without hesitation as if Eric would come home safely from his encounter with the Authority and that whatever challenges we had ahead of us were, well, _ahead of us_.

And while Eric might not have realized that yet, to judge by the worry he was still experiencing, I was going to embrace it as an article of faith. I still didn't know what would happen to Tara, but I was going to choose to believe that Eric would return and we would start tackling the meaning of our bond when he did.

I let the relief flow through my body, just as Sam looked from me to Lafayette to Jesús and blurted out, "So, let me get this straight. Lafayette is a medium, Sookie's a fairy and Jesús, you're a witch?" He looked accusingly again at all three of us. "Why the fuck doesn't _anyone_ in this town tell me _anything_, goddammit?" And it was my giddy relief for Eric that made me begin to laugh hysterically at the annoyed expression on my shifter friend's face.

**A/N: For those of you who are wondering why Pam wasn't successful in glamouring Jesús, I'm going with the idea expressed on the show that the more supernatural you are, the less you are able to be glamoured. With his demon inside him, Jesus is no longer subject to glamour – not that I'd be too quick to reveal that information to anyone. Lafayette, on the other hand, is still human enough – at least at this point – to be subject to glamouring. That may, however, change in future…**

**The Twister costume, btw, is real! Just ****look up "Sexy Twister Costume" at HalloweenCostumes, one word. (Sorry, but FF seems to be blocking links again.)  
********  
**


	7. Chapter 7: Burdensome Politics

**A/N: I know, I am the Worst. Updater. Ever. Especially in winter when the days are cold and grey, and did I mention the coldness and the greyness? Between that and real life stuff, I've been neglecting my poor Sooric. Please forgive me.  
**

**Just a reminder: The new Magister, Theodora Kader, is an original character. She just had a little glamour-enhanced chat with with prisoner Tara and is now trying to figure out how Eric fits into what she learned from Miss Thornton.  
**

**Chapter 7: Burdensome Politics**

Eric

"So, Sheriff Northman," Chancellor Kader said gently, "Please tell me about Sookie Stackhouse. And why you would so inexplicably risk yourself to protect her, even from the highest of vampire authorities."

The silence hung between us for just a beat too long.

"She's a telepath," I replied flatly. "And the kingdom of Louisiana might be perceived as somewhat…vulnerable…given recent circumstances. I've simply tried to protect a very valuable _local _asset from being appropriated by those who have more resources to draw on than we do. Magister." I tipped my head slightly towards her, as it attempting to counteract the defiance in my tone.

"You don't trust the Authority to keep their hands off your property?" the Chancellor asked, her tone deceptively mild.

"The Authority may be _in_ Louisiana, but it is not seen to be _of _Louisiana, Magister," I replied, my voice crisp. "While the placement of Authority headquarters here in New Orleans has brought some economic benefit to our kingdom, you can't deny that the kingdom of Louisiana has fewer resources than some other territories."

Chancellor Kader chuckled. "And deliberately so, you must realize, Sheriff. More powerful states might forget the proper order of hierarchy and try to advance their _local _interests were they to have the seat of vampire power in their midst." Her smile twisted slightly. "Why else do you think we approved the placement of a vampire as young as William Compton on Louisiana's throne? He's very… _cooperative._"

I couldn't help but snort. "Magister, I would advise you not to underestimate my king or his ambitions on the basis of his age. My late queen learned that lesson the hard way." Sophie-Anne had regarded Bill as her _most loyal subject_ – right up until he turned her into a soupy pile of gore-covered couture in his own living room.

"And what of _your_ ambitions, Sheriff?" The Chancellor rose from her seat and walked towards the mantel of a fireplace to one side of the room and stopped, turning back towards me to let one arm rest easily along the mantel's edge. I noticed she was within easy reach of the fire irons that stood beside the hearth. It was a stance prepared for self-defense, which meant she expected something she would say to provoke me.

Was she going to reveal she knew something about Sookie that she should not?

"I have no ambitions beyond successful management of my area, Magister," I replied evenly. "I believe higher level politics to be…burdensome."

"Indeed, they can be," the Chancellor acknowledged as one slim hand reached out and rested nonchalantly on the handle of one of the metal fire implements. "And speaking of 'higher level politics,' I understand that the previous Magister was last known to be in your area. In your bar, in fact, before he so mysteriously disappeared. What can you tell me about those circumstances?"

I should have known that even if the rest of the Authority had been content to let the fate of the last Magister remain a mystery, a new Magister might not be so placid. Especially when dealing with the vampire in whose establishment the missing Magister had last been seen.

I wasn't particularly eager to reveal the truth, but better to give her something about the disappearance of the former Magister if it meant keeping her off the topic of Sookie.

"I can tell you that Russell Edgington delivered the true death to him in my presence. _After_ forcing the Magister to conduct a rite of union between himself and the Queen of Louisiana, with my progeny and myself as witnesses," I responded honestly.

The Chancellor's fingers twitched on the end of the fire iron as she frowned. "Russell married Sophie-Anne? Without Authority approval?"

"As the former Magister was under duress at the time – as were my progeny, myself _and_ my queen –" I said pointedly. "—I have to assume the vows were non-binding. Especially now that the royal parties are both dead." Or as good as, where Russell was concerned.

"And you told no one of this?" The Magister looked annoyed for the first time.

"Magister, my progeny and I were witnesses to a treasonous act by a madman who was the most powerful vampire I ever encountered. With no living witnesses to verify our coercion in the situation, we were reluctant to bring it to official attention…_unnecessarily_. Frankly, we had hoped the matter died with their majesties," I replied. "As I said…I find higher level politics burdensome." I raised my eyebrows at her.

The new Magister assessed me for a long moment before her body relaxed slightly, her hand dropping away from the fire iron.

"Well, if the truth be told, Sheriff," she finally drawled, "The late Magister's unfortunate disappearance _did_ make it easier for the Guardian to update the position to better suit the current needs of the Council."

Yes, I imagine having a vampire traditionalist in the second-highest position in the vampire hierarchy _would_ have put a damper on the pro-mainstreaming agenda. No wonder the rest of the Authority might have been willing to let the mystery remain unsolved.

"And, of course, I am considerably older and more powerful than my predecessor. Far more difficult to defeat if challenged." Chancellor Kader smiled tightly at me, her fangs not necessary to underscore the intended threat behind her words.

_Old enough to fucking kill me in a heartbeat._ I got the message clearly and acknowledged her unspoken warning with a slight nod. "No one but a madman like Edgington would ever presume to do so, Magister."

Her body noticeably more fluid now that she had evidently decided I was not an immediate threat to her, Chancellor Kader glided away from the fireplace and its irons and back towards me, stopping a short distance away, her arms still crossed in front of her, with one hand resting lightly against her chin.

I might not have to worry about going down for the death of the last Magister, but her next words proved I was still not off the hook where Sookie was concerned.

"I am still somewhat confused, Sheriff," Chancellor Kader said, her brow furrowing. "You say you find our politics burdensome and yet you claim your protection of Miss Stackhouse is 'all for king and kingdom'?" The Magister tilted her head at me quizzically. "I've made numerous inquiries about you the past several months, Sheriff Northman. And what I discovered was that you are not – to be quite frank – known for your tremendous loyalty to either your current sovereign or the general well-being of the state of Louisiana." The Chancellor circled around my chair slowly as she spoke. "In fact, you are – as you yourself have just claimed – noted for your detachment from the usual fray of our politics. So how is it you claim your protection of Miss Stackhouse is politically motivated?" She stopped behind me where I could not see her expression as she asked the question.

My lips tightened. "As I said, I am not interested in politics. _Unless_, that is, they affect me directly. Miss Stackhouse's talent has proved useful to me – in business and other matters – several times."

The Magister came around from behind me and drew close enough that, seated as I was, her standing figure loomed over me. "The glamoured Miss Thornton offered me a somewhat different interpretation of your motives, Sheriff. She seems to think your interest in Miss Stackhouse is not professional, but personal. _Very_ personal."

The second most politically powerful vampire in the United States leaned in close to me and dropped her voice into a low, confidential tone. "I'm told that you bought Miss Stackhouse's home while she was 'missing' last year and had it renovated – _very cozily_, according to Miss Thornton. That you had a personal 'cubby' for your own day rest built in the home during Miss Stackhouse's absence. That you had a –" The corner of Theodora Kader's mouth twitched as if she were stifling amusement. "—a 'big-ass microwave' with a large red bow delivered to the home recently as a gift." The Magister's dark eyebrows quirked upwards. "Sheriff Northman, that doesn't sound like mere professional attention to an area asset to me. That sounds like _courtship._"

The irony that an Authority Chancellor had identified my actions for what they were while Sookie herself had not was not lost on me.

"I will admit that I do have a personal interest in Miss Stackhouse," I finally conceded begrudgingly. "_Sexual,_" I clarified with force. True enough, if not the full truth. Admitting to lust for Sookie was safe; admitting to love for her would make us both vulnerable. "She has proved…resistant to my previous advances."

The Chancellor actually laughed. "I don't imagine that has happened to you in a _very_ long time, Sheriff. Perhaps that is her appeal? The allure of the difficult to obtain," she mused. "But why coax instead of force?" She looked at me with genuine curiosity. "Surely you could just take her? Or were you hesitant because she once belonged to your king?"

Sookie's affiliation with Bill Compton had been all the more reason to pursue her, at least initially. Until I fell her under spell just as he had.

"She hasn't been King Compton's for some time," I answered, my jaw twitching.

_And never would be again, if I could help it._

"And yes, I could just take her. But what would be the fun in that?" I smirked at the Magister before admitting more candidly, "Frankly, Miss Stackhouse is a valuable asset to us. And I have found over time that she responds best to requests when she does not feel … forced." I grimaced to myself, thinking about how foolish I had been not to consider that in terms of our blood bond. In retrospect, I should have known Sookie would react the way she had, and kept my own temper in check. Instead, I had vented my own frustration at her in a very _human_ way.

That was something that hadn't happened in many centuries, but my self-control seemed to have continuously eroded since the day I met Sookie Stackhouse.

"Mmmm," Chancellor Kader made a noncommittal noise, straightening and drifting a step or two away. "So, you want her. And perhaps even respect her?" The question sounded like it was intended to draw me into some sort of questionable admission. Depending on the Magister's own view of humans, expressing respect for one could work either for or against me. I hedged.

"As much as I can respect any human," I answered with a shrug. "What should a good, mainstreaming vampire answer in these circumstances, Magister?" I drawled sarcastically. My patience with this cat and mouse game was growing thin. While she seemed satisfied with my explanation about the true death of the previous Magister, Theodora Kader was clearly trying to test me in some way, but it wasn't obvious to me what answer she was looking for.

"A 'good, mainstreaming vampire' wouldn't even have to ask that question," the Magister replied. "Which is precisely why I find your actions concerning Miss Stackhouse so intriguing, Sheriff. From all I have learned about you, you're clearly not the passionate devotee of the mainstreaming cause that your king is. And yet, your behavior towards your telepath is remarkably courteous. I'm simply trying to understand your motivation."

_I'm in love with her. _That _truth_ was definitely not a safe answer for either Sookie or me.

"If you have been making inquiries about me, I'm sure you have heard that I am, above all, a pragmatist. If one approach does not work in getting what I want, I try another," I replied bluntly. "I have been…as you say…_coaxing_ her into giving me what I want."

"I see," the Chancellor said, again suppressing what looked like some unshared amusement. She began to move around me again, slowly. "Tell me, Sheriff Northman: does this urge to protect Miss Stackhouse – only for your own interests, of course – extend to her family and her friends?"

"Not often," I answered shortly. In the past, such protection beyond Sookie herself might have been a tool I used to win her favor, but I suddenly realized I felt a new and strange sense of obligation to those Sookie loved. Even Tara Thornton, despite what she had done to me.

The unexpected emotional response made me pause. Perhaps that was another unexpected effect of Sookie's blood in me?

Given the number of surprises the bond was holding for both of us, maybe Sookie had been right to be concerned. If I found myself _wanting_ to protect Sookie's rather sizeable circle of friends in Bon Temps because of our bond, my life was certainly going to get complicated. Sookie's friends – much like her brother and even my Sookie herself – seemed to _attract_ trouble.

The Chancellor had moved around in front of me again and her dark eyes studied me thoughtfully for a moment before she spoke. "Sheriff Northman, are you aware of Miss Thornton's history with a vampire named Franklin Mott?"

_Speaking of Sookie's friends who attracted trouble…_although I was relieved to be off the subject of Sookie herself.

"I know that they were involved at one point, yes," I answered cautiously. I had been subjected to the drama that followed Tara and Sookie's escape from Russell Edgington's mansion, including the late Talbot's angst over Franklin's blood on the bed linens. Franklin had survived Tara's attack on him, although I had not hung around long enough to find out how long it would take to regrow the amount of brain tissue Tara Thornton had splattered on the walls of the King of Mississippi's guest room. For all I knew, Mott had met the true death after being left behind, still incapacitated, when Russell's minions had fled the royal compound.

"Did you know that Franklin Mott met the true death while visiting your area?"

_Shit. _ Well, evidently Mott had survived long enough to make it to northern Louisiana. "No. I was not aware of that. Are you saying Tara Thornton ended him?" I asked grimly.

If it was true that Tara had killed Franklin Mott before she killed Nan Flanagan, her fate was inescapable. Killing one vampire might be viewed as circumstantial; killing two looked you were trying to eradicate us. We didn't take kindly to that. Although I had to admit, for a regular human to kill two vampires was surprisingly badass. Maybe I should have been more afraid of Tara Thornton when she was waving that fire poker at me in Sookie's living room.

"No, not at all." Chancellor Kader lowered herself gracefully into the chair across from me. "According to Miss Thornton, she was attacked by Franklin Mott outside the tavern where she worked in Bon Temps last autumn before she relocated here to New Orleans. He was apparently very unhappy with how they had…parted." Remembering the smashed melon of his head, I wasn't surprised. "Franklin Mott was about to kill her when someone else intervened and shot him with a wooden bullet."

"The shifter who owns the bar?" I speculated.

"No, Sheriff Northman. The shooter was your telepath's brother – Jason Stackhouse."

_Fuck me. _No wonder the Magister wanted to know if my sense of protection extended to Sookie's family. Was _min __blóð__frig_'s brother ever _not_ in trouble? Maybe I should have killed him over that broken window when I had the chance, I thought dourly.

My face must have shown my feelings without my even being conscious of it, as the Magister said coolly, "I see that this is news to you. What can you tell me about Jason Stackhouse?"

_That he's a fucking irresponsible idiot of a brother. _In my mind's eye, I saw the broken window that had finally pushed me to buy Sookie's house rather than let it continue to deteriorate under Jason Stackhouse's care. No, better to stick to facts, not the feelings Sookie's brother provoked in me. "He's a relatively new member of the Renard Parish police force," I replied. "Not particularly bright, although his athletic skills are excellent for a human. And he's well-known for his popularity with the local female population."

"Yes, Miss Thornton described him quite colorfully as a 'man-whore,'" the Magister observed with a half-smile.

_In glamour, veritas._

"But a _non-telepathic_ man-whore," I responded shortly. "He's never shown any signs of his sister's special talent." Not the telepathy or any of those talents – like Sookie's light-ball-throwing hands – of which the Authority knew nothing. The mystery of why Jason Stackhouse did not show signs of a fae heritage like his sister was something to consider another day. If I didn't kill him myself for once again putting his sister at risk, even accidently, that is.

"And what of his history with vampires before Franklin Mott?" Chancellor Kader asked.

I weighed my response carefully. This was not the time to bring up Jason's involvement in Eddie Fournier's true death, especially since I had turned a blind eye his involvement in it for Sookie's sake. Nor did it seem wise to mention Jason's history as a V addict. Or his time with the Fellowship of the Sun.

Shit. If he wasn't Sookie's brother, I wouldn't be sitting here trying to think of what I could say that would not put a target on the fool. But so long as Sookie loved him, I owed him some protection.

There was that goddamned strange _emotion _again.

"He was critical in defusing the incident at the Fellowship of the Sun in Dallas," I finally said, picking the one positive thing I could say about Sookie's brother. "He put himself in potential harm's way to rescue both his sister and me from the Reverend Newlin." That he had done so using excellent marksmanship with a paintball gun – when his shooting skills had also been used against Franklin Mott – seemed, again, like a detail better not shared.

"Is he a danger to our kind?" Chancellor Kader asked.

"Only if you try to hurt someone he cares about," I replied. "And he cares very much for his sister." I had to concede the point, even if I didn't think he did enough to show that care for Sookie at times. "And evidently for Tara Thornton."

"But he is not likely to kill vampires as a matter of principle?" The Magister probed.

"According to Miss Stackhouse, he has a close friendship with King Compton's progeny, Jessica Hamby, so I hope not," I answered drily.

Chancellor Kader did not respond but toyed with the Authority ring on one of her fingers as she sat in a thoughtful silence.

It was nearly two excruciatingly long minutes later that she finally puffed out a sigh. I tensed; it sounded like the sort of sigh one made when one had reached a decision. Whatever test she had been administering to me, I was about to find out if I had passed or failed.

"Sheriff Northman, the Guardian feels very strongly about maintaining a truly cooperative relationship between our kind and humans," the Magister finally began. "Although he is personally distressed by the death of Nan Flanagan, he feels it is necessary that we treat her accused killer with a due process that will satisfy the humans. That said, naturally we do not wish to leave our deliberations _entirely_ up to chance."

I suppressed a skeptical noise. I found it hard to believe the Authority ever left anything up to chance.

The Magister continued. "The Guardian asked me to personally investigate the circumstances of Nan's death and make recommendations for what would best serve justice where Miss Thornton is concerned – and yet ensure that our ruling does not inflame human-vampire tensions unnecessarily."

I speculated aloud, as my own mind worked through the possibilities. "I assume you're going to claim that Tara Thornton was an anti-vampire terrorist in order to explain why she will be given the death penalty if found guilty." Which I was sure Tara would be; I had no illusions about how far our power structure was likely to bend in order to accommodate human values. A human killing a vampire in self-defense, regardless of how understandable it seemed to humans, had not been a viable defense in a vampire court in centuries. Tara Thornton was going to be found guilty of _something._

"Well, I would have, if I had found that Miss Thornton _was_ an anti-vampire terrorist," Chancellor Kader acknowledged with a wry look. "But the problem, of course, is that she isn't. Yes, she does hate vampire kind, but she clearly killed Nan Flanagan for very _personal_ reasons – in order to protect _your telepath_ from being taken by us. This does not seem to be a political act."

Chancellor Kader steepled her delicate fingers together before she continued. "Frankly, given Miss Thornton's brutal maltreatment by Franklin Mott and what I see as Mott's _justifiable_ true death at Jason Stackhouse's hands, I cannot blame her for her feelings towards vampires. I can appreciate her suspicion of us and her worry about what could happen to her friend in the hands of the most powerful vampires known in the New World. It is my opinion that Miss Thornton appears to have been acting in a loyal and well-meaning, if misguided, intent to protect Miss Stackhouse from what she felt was a real threat. I must take those extenuating circumstances into account, even if she _is _guilty of killing Nan."

I stared at Magister, unable to process what she had just said. She could _understand_ Tara killing Nan? And excuse Jason killing Franklin Mott? In the hundreds of years since the position of Magister had been created, I doubted any one of them previous to Theodora Kader had sided with _humans_ in any dispute.

"So, here is my dilemma, Sheriff Northman," Chancellor Kader said, spreading her hands palms up, in front of her and leaning towards me. "I have a human who is undoubtedly guilty of killing one of the most well-known vampires in America. Failure to hold her accountable for that death in some way is not an option. She _must_ be punished – but punished fairly, in a way that will satisfy both human and vampire values." The Magister shook her dark head. "Of course, the traditional vampire punishment would be to simply execute her, just as we did the necromancers. And I do believe we could make a case for that decision in the court of public opinion, both human and vampire, especially in a state like Louisiana that imposes capital punishment for human on human murder."

The Magister paused and pursed her lips. "But this is a new era and we of the Authority are striving to try _innovative _approaches. So I intend to make a different recommendation. One that would allow Miss Thornton the opportunity to be – shall we say – _rehabilitated_. To perhaps learn that not all vampires are as brutal as Franklin Mott, and that some of us truly do wish to have a cooperative relationship with humans."

I could feel my lips gaping slightly open in astonishment at what I was hearing and made a concerted effort to close my mouth. "You're going to turn her," I stated rather than asked, half hoping she would deny my obviously outrageous deduction.

"No, Sheriff Northman," the Magister corrected. "I'm going to ask _you_ to turn her."

**A/N: Special shout outs to my friends eys1214, sweetmg and treewitch703 for their feedback as well as several readers whose encouragement, and reviews have kept me poking (albeit slowly) away at this story even in these cold, dreary winter days. I always say I'm writing this just for me - but it helps me keep going to know you guys are out there and care whether I write it or not. Thank you! XOXO**


	8. Chapter 8: The Devil You Know

**Chapter 8: The Devil You Know**

Eric

I stared at the Magister. "Why me?" I finally inquired, wary.

"Because of your relationship with Miss Stackhouse, of course," Chancellor Kader replied. "And your apparent desire to protect her – and, by extension, those close to her."

Why the fuck would an Authority Chancellor want to protect Sookie or any other human for that matter? My confusion must have been obvious on my face.

The Magister leaned forward again. "Sheriff Northman, if we have a full trial for Miss Thornton, her entire background will come out. We will have to reveal her relationship with Franklin Mott – and how he met the true death, including the role of Miss Stackhouse's brother. We will also have to discuss Miss Thornton's real motive in killing Nan Flanagan, that she was trying to keep Miss Stackhouse from our attention. Everything Miss Thornton told me while under glamour will become known to the full Authority. _Everything._" The Chancellor's look at me was pointed. "Is that an acceptable outcome to you, Sheriff?"

"Not particularly," I conceded through stiff lips.

"Then the best option is for Miss Thornton to willingly plead guilty to the charges of murdering Nan Flanagan and to accept her punishment. No revelations of her history – or the involvement of Miss Stackhouse or her brother – would then be necessary."

"But why should _you_ care if any of it comes out?" I asked. "What do you gain by keeping the Stackhouses out of this?"

"Making their involvement known makes things unnecessarily complicated," the Magister replied. "I am not interested in drawing still more humans into this case. And, frankly, I have more pressing issues to deal with than to create excessive drama over what I believe were understandable acts of personal protection." Her gaze caught mine. "And while the most compassionate response might be for us to release Miss Thornton, that is simply not possible in the current political climate. I believe my solution to be the best option we can offer her in these circumstances."

She was silent for a moment before saying in a quiet voice, "I also like the idea of getting to know you better, Sheriff, and I see this as one way to achieve that." She glanced down at her hands, where the blood red stone of her Authority ring glinted. "I knew your Maker, Godric." She looked back up at me and her eyes were nostalgic. "He and I found we had much in common in his last years, Sheriff, although I found his choice to meet the sun…troubling." She studied me. "I am curious to see how like your Maker you truly are. I hoped you might consider my offer to protect the Stackhouses a …_friendly gesture_… on my part."

I was silent for a moment before replying gruffly, "I am no Godric, Magister."

While the Chancellor tried to maintain her neutral expression, I saw a lightning-fast hint of disappointment cross her face. "You mean you do not share his beliefs in the value of humans?"

I pursed my lips as I considered how to answer. I had spent a thousand years using humans for food, sex and entertainment, but unlike many vampires, I had never really felt the need to dismiss them as mere livestock. I simply hadn't cared about their metaphysical status one way or another so long as my needs were met. They were just…_there._ To be eaten or fucked or whatever else I found them useful for.

Until Sookie. I had found myself _caring_ about Sookie, long before the witches' disruptive curse landed me under her roof.

But then, Sookie wasn't entirely human. Although her _feelings_...the feelings that kept percolating through me even though we were currently hundreds of miles apart...decidedly were. For a brief moment, I just savored the thrum that was Sookie's blood in me. She felt busy, maybe a bit harried. But _safe._ Even if she had pushed me away before I left Bon Temps, I reminded myself that keeping her that way was why I was in this treacherous situation.

Chancellor Kader was still waiting for my answer. Instead of answering her directly, I asked her my own question. "Did you know that Miss Stackhouse was with Godric when he met the sun?" I hesitated as I remembered my own frustration at not being able to stop my Maker from his action. "She kept him company until it was over. Because she did not want him to be alone in that moment." The thought that Godric might have died alone but for Sookie still stung my heart.

"Really?" The Chancellor startled with surprise. "That was not in Nan's report on the incident." She looked at me, understanding crossing her face. "And is this why you are so intrigued by Miss Stackhouse?"

"It may have played a role," I admitted. "She was very…kind to my Maker," I said after a moment. "And while kindness is not highly valued among our kind – including by me, if I'm honest – I appreciate her action towards Godric at his true death."

"Not all of us dismiss such human virtues, Sheriff," Chancellor Kader replied. "Especially if we are to build a lasting peace with humankind." She sighed. "So, you may or may not value humans…but you value Miss Stackhouse's humanity." She shrugged slightly. "I can work with that." Her lips twisted in a ghost of a smile before she continued in a more business-like tone, "I have promised Miss Thornton that if she accepts the plea agreement, what I learned from her will not be revealed. She wishes to protect her friends from harm. She has agreed to be made vampire in exchange for our not pursuing any further charges."

"I don't know Tara Thornton well, but I know enough to know she wouldn't normally want to be turned," I said. "How did you overcome her reluctance to be one of us? By glamour?"

The Magister looked somewhat offended by my (I thought reasonable) suggestion. "Sheriff, I am as capable of manipulation and deceit as any of us, but these circumstances require authenticity. No, I used _logic_ with Miss Thornton. I reminded her that the option of turning was, after all, meant to be a punishment for a crime, but one she might find preferable to human death," the Magister explained. "And then I assured her that it would save her friends if she cooperated since it will limit any further inquiry into any of her actions. And, finally, I told her that, after she was turned, if she was truly that unhappy, no one would stop her from ending herself. Although she will not be given the opportunity to do that while in our custody, of course."

"So, I'm to be saddled with a potentially suicidal new vampire," I observed darkly. "Again, why me? Am I being punished for something?"

The Chancellor raised her eyebrows. "You find creating progeny distasteful?"

"Only if they're unwilling. It takes the fun out of it," I said. I wasn't about to reveal the information to the Magister, but I had never turned anyone besides Pam, and I had not done so lightly, despite her having forced my hand. But at least I could say I knew Pam had wanted it.

Chancellor Kader shrugged. "It is not truly necessary for it to be _you_, but I thought you would be the most agreeable in these circumstances. Because of your history with those involved, you might have something to gain from my proposal. We turn Miss Thornton and all inquiry about the Stackhouse siblings will naturally drop. Which is why I am hoping for your _discreet_ cooperation in this matter."

"Is that 'cooperation' an order or a request? " I asked.

The corner of the Chancellor's mouth quirked up in a smile. "Sheriff, you are not the only one who has learned when to use _coaxing_ instead of force to get the best results from others. And while I could, indeed, force you to do what I've asked, well, as you yourself have said, what's the fun in that?" Her dark brown eyes shone at me. "No, Sheriff, I want to offer you an opportunity to … protect your interests. Only because they coincidentally align with my own and those of the Guardian. "

But not those of all the Authority members? Nora had told me that Nan Flanagan's influence within the vampire power structure had been waning, but I had attributed it to Nan's strident personality, not her politics. I wondered if perhaps there was more dissent among the members of the Council than was known.

"And if I decline to be the Maker?" I asked.

The Magister shrugged again. "She'll still be turned, but she will be under the command of another Maker. Someone perhaps not as interested in keeping Miss Stackhouse and her brother out of things as I believe you to be."

Fuck.

I dipped my head respectfully towards the Magister. "I will be… _honored_… to fulfill the sentence of the Authority, Magister."

Chancellor Kader rose. "Excellent. You will be escorted to the Council Chambers when we are ready to begin the formal proceedings."

**~*E&S*~**

It was nearly midnight when my guard finally led me into a large, formal hall gleaming with marble pillars. What I assumed were the Council of Chancellors – the dreaded Vampire Authority – were seated around a large board table, notepads, pens and bottles of Tru-Blood at each seat. In addition to Nora and Magister Kader, there were two other women – a blowsy-looking redhead and a stunningly beautiful but ancient female with delicate features – three men, and a round-faced boy.

For vampires who ruled the world as we knew it, it was a surprisingly soft- looking group. And shockingly young. While I could tell that at least one of the men and the exceptionally beautiful woman – as well as Chancellor Kader – were older than I was, most of them were half my age, if that. As a group, they looked as if they could be blown away by one good blast of Sookie's fae light.

Except for the male vampire at the head of the table. He was not as tall as I was, but still muscular and imposing, with receding dark hair and piercing eyes. He was only half my age, but he looked as if he would make up for what he might lack in age-based strength with sheer will and determination. He had to have both in spades if he had transformed the motley group before me into the apex of global vampire politics.

"Sheriff Northman, if you will join your friends, we can begin," the Magister said, rising from her seat. Since visiting my chambers, she had changed into a softly tailored pantsuit in a dark navy blue, an outfit that looked appropriately prosecutorial.

'My friends' – Pam and Bill – were seated at opposite ends of a long marble bench to one side of the chamber, with armed guards much like my own standing 'casually' behind them. I silently strode over to the bench and seated myself beside my progeny. Pam subtly slid closer to me and nonchalantly placed one hand on the cool marble between us with the edge of her fingers just brushing against my leg, unobtrusively seeking comfort. I could feel that she was frightened, although you would never know it from her placid expression. My king was grim and didn't even nod in acknowledgment as I took my place beside him.

The vampire at the head of the table rose and with a jerk of his head indicated that we peons on the bench should rise as well. "As we weigh the scales of justice, let us now invoke Lilith, that she may guide us to a fair accounting," he intoned before beginning to speak in what sounded to me like ancient Aramaic. Around the table, the Authority members bowed their heads and closed their eyes, as did Bill, but Pam and I continued to stand neutrally, our eyes still open. Nora raised a sidelong glance at me and frowned in irritation, trying to gesture silently at me with her head to indicate I needed to follow the other vampires in their reverent attitude, but I just raised a sardonic brow at her. I didn't mind being respectful, but to pretend to pray to a god I didn't believe in seemed excessively hypocritical to me.

Fortunately, if anyone else noticed my lack of true veneration, they didn't comment, although the leader of the Authority shot me a narrow-eyed, speculative look as he raised his head and finished his invocation. The icy eyes rested on me for only a few seconds before he turned and signaled to Authority guards near the door. "Bring the prisoner in and let's get this judgment underway. I'd like to get the PR aspects of this clusterfuck under control as soon as possible."

The ethereally lovely female Chancellor spoke in a quiet but firm voice as two sentries left the room. "Guardian, we would be done with this matter already if you had simply put down Nan's killer as readily as we did the necromancers. We all agreed that the witches were too dangerous to survive. Why should we treat this coconspirator of theirs differently? I don't see why we need to go through this charade when –"

"Chancellor Agrippa," the Guardian cut the female vampire off. "Our idiot friends in Northern Louisiana have placed us in this position with their ineptitude." The steely glance towards the bench where Bill, Pam and I sat left no doubt who the Guardian was referring to. Beside me, Bill's posture grew more rigid and I could feel Pam tense. "But we're going to _try_ to make some sort of fucking silk purse out of this sow's ear. We can't give the press the necromancers since they were so…_intractable_…up until the end. But perhaps we can salvage something from this fucking mess. Let's at least make a goddamn effort, shall we?" Around the conference table, the other Chancellors had grown tense as the Guardian growled out his response, but only Chancellor Agrippa's gaze battled with his for several long seconds before she murmured, "Yes, Guardian," and lowered her eyes.

At the door, the guards entered, half-dragging a handcuffed Tara Thornton with them. They came to a stop between the bench where I sat with the rest of the Louisiana contingent and the table full of Authority members, and Tara collapsed to the floor. I could see that she had been treated – using human methods, not vampire blood – for the arm she had injured in the hotel, but she showed no other signs of physical abuse. However, she did look as if she was emotionally exhausted and she stank of tears and despair.

The redheaded Chancellor at the table let out a shrill squawk of laughter before blurting in a thick Texas accent, "_That_ scrawny little thing is what killed Nan Flanagan? You have got to be kidding me!"

Tara raised her head, her expression dull, only to mutter thickly, "And I'd do it again, motherfu—"

In a flash of movement, Chancellor Kader was kneeling beside Tara, her stern face within inches of the prisoner's. I could see what the table full of Chancellors could not, as they were behind Kader's back: the Magister was warning Tara with her expression not to be foolish. With a shudder, the brief flash of defiance died from Tara's reddened and swollen eyes and she closed them as if trying to pretend she was somewhere else.

"I thought you said she was remorseful after your conversation with her," my sister said in her crisp British voice to Magister Kader. "That doesn't sound particularly repentant to me."

Chancellor Kader moved to stand, positioning herself between the crumpled form on the ground and the other vampires. "I never said she was remorseful," the Magister replied evenly, "Only that she had admitted her guilt to me, openly and honestly."

The boy at the table huffed. "Then why are we waiting? Let's end her if she is guilty by her own admission. Death to the human!" he blurted out with relish.

The Guardian frowned at the boy, who failed to notice the chilly regard.

"Actually, I proposed an alternative punishment for Miss Thornton and the Guardian has agreed that it could be a creative solution," the Magister said calmly. "One that benefits us more than another execution would, especially as we try to maintain our détente with humans."

The vampire child's eyes shifted as if he were about to roll them in mockery, but he finally noticed the Guardian's eyes on him and instead simply pinched his mouth tight with dissatisfaction.

"In exchange for willingly pleading guilty to the charge of murdering Nan Flanagan, Miss Thornton has agreed to be made vampire," the Magister proclaimed.

There was a rustle of reaction around the table and I caught two of the adult male Chancellors – one African in appearance and the other a pale, bearded European of great age – glancing at each other. "One Steve Newlin wasn't enough?" the ancient European drawled in a faintly Teutonic accent. "Granted, he has worked out better than we ever hoped, but he had a public role before his turning that we can eventually make use of. All this woman has is her hatred for our kind. She's a nobody."

"Precisely," interjected the Guardian with satisfaction. "She has no public position for us to exploit, no friends in high places, nothing _obvious _we can gain by turning her. Instead of getting a well-deserved death penalty for her terrorist act, she not only lives, but gets a chance to, let's say, _move past_ her admittedly strong anti-vampire bigotry by becoming one of us. This makes us look generous in our verdict." The Guardian actually grinned. "And if she turns out to be as happy a vampire as Reverend Newlin has, we may be able to do something with her later. And if not – well, if she is decides to meet the true death of her own accord, at least we gave her a chance. I think we've got a win-win here."

"You mean you are going to _reward_ a – an anti-vampire terrorist by making her one of us?" Chancellor Agrippa sputtered. "Roman – Guardian – is that a wise use of the sacred blood?" It was obvious the sultry Chancellor was shocked and angry, but I could see that she was hastily trying to regroup from her initial outburst and regain self-control.

"Oh, come now, Salome," the Guardian responded. I started, looking with fresh eyes at the beautiful Chancellor he addressed. I had known she was significantly older than I was, but could she truly be the Biblical Salome? That would make her nearly 2,000 years old, of an age with Godric. The Guardian continued, "You know as well as I do that all sorts of twits and lowlifes are turned with the _sacred blood_ on a daily basis. At least Miss Thornton would serve a useful purpose to the vampire cause. Turning her is hardly that shocking." The Guardian's cold eyes rested on Tara, who was still huddled on the floor, trembling. "And Miss Thornton, you have agreed to this, haven't you?"

"Y-yes," Tara stuttered out faintly. "Yes, I agreed." She sounded broken and resigned, and I felt a pang of respect since I knew she was only doing this to protect Sookie and her brother. She could easily have given them up to the Authority, and I had to give her credit for being friend enough not to let that happen.

"And who would do this turning?" Nora asked. "Are you expecting one of us to take Nan's killer on as a child? Because that is just –"

My sister was still searching for a word vile enough to express her disgust with the idea when Magister Kader responded, "As the problem arose in northern Louisiana, I was actually going to ask the local authorities there to administer the sentence and tend to Miss Thornton's care."

Beside me, Bill Compton twitched reflexively. Did he think he was going to be called upon to do the deed? Given his reluctance to turn Jessica Hamby, I could see why he might fear yet another forced turning. Jessica seemed to be turning out well, but I hadn't forgotten Bill's initially poor parenting of his unexpected child.

"I recommend that Sheriff Northman be the one to administer the sentence," Chancellor Kader continued. Beside me, Pam was unable to stifle her gasp and I could see by Nora's shocked face that she hadn't been expecting the pronouncement either.

"No – Guardian, if you would permit me, I would be willing to take responsibility for Miss Thornton," Bill ground out. I glanced at him in surprise. I didn't know what he felt he owed Tara Thornton to do it, but I knew it cost him something to volunteer himself.

"No!" choked out Tara from her position on the floor. "No, not Bill Compton. _Please_." Her voice was trembling along with her body and I knew that as terrified as she was, for her to speak up at all was an effort.

"Sounds like she's not a fan of yours, Compton," the Guardian drawled. "Not much of a recommendation, especially if she's from that same little podunk town you're made the seat of your kingdom. What in the _hell _goes on in that place, anyhow? Nan was always telling us stories." He shook his head as if baffled. "Anyone _else_ in this room eager to sire Miss Thornton in the Sheriff's place?"

Beside me, I felt Pam's body tense and through our bond I sensed an internal struggle. For reasons I couldn't begin to understand, she was actually considering speaking up herself. Without looking her way, I put my hand out and covered hers warningly, willing her to remain quiet.

At the silence in the chamber, the Guardian suddenly slapped his hand flat on the table with a meaty thud. "Fine, Sheriff Northman it is! Miss Thornton, stand up. I'm going to ask you one more time for the record and then you will be escorted back to your cell to await imposition of your sentence."

The two guards with Tara helped her to her feet and she stood, still shaking and subdued, clutching at her pained arm.

"Tara Thornton, you have been charged with the murder of Nan Flanagan. How do you plead?" the Guardian asked briskly.

"I plead guilty," Tara replied, her voice stronger than I would have expected.

"And, acknowledging your guilt, you have agreed to be made vampire in recompense. You do this freely and while not under compulsion of any kind, including glamour. Do you verify this?"

"Yes," Tara murmured.

"Then, Tara Thornton, you will be made vampire by Sheriff Eric Northman of Louisiana Area 5 before dawn this morning. Tomorrow night you will rise as vampire and will be released to his custody." The Guardian turned towards me and he dropped his official tone. "Northman, I expect you to keep her alive for at least a month to say we gave her a chance to acclimate. She will not be offing herself while still anywhere _near_ New Orleans or for the next 30 days, am I understood?"

"Yes, Guardian," I replied.

"Roslyn, I'm going to ask you to prepare a press release explaining our creative and compassionate sentence for our misinformed human friend. Be sure to emphasize how we hope that seeing vampire life from the other side will open her mind to the equality of all races," the Guardian dictated.

"Certainly, Guardian," the blowsy redhead responded as she was jotting down a flurry of handwritten notes on the pad in front of her. "I'll see that it is released ASAP, and contact Nancy Grace directly."

The Guardian rubbed his hands together in satisfaction and stood up. "Great, then let's get on to more interesting subjects. Compton, I'd like you to stay a bit with us and chat. Northman, you and your current progeny are dismissed until the time comes for you to turn Miss Thornton."

I couldn't imagine what the Authority wanted with Bill Compton, but better him than me. I wanted to do what I needed to and get the hell out of New Orleans. Sookie may have told me she needed time and space, but our bond was tugging at me insistently to be closer to her, and as soon as possible. If that mean respecting the distance between Shreveport and Bon Temps, fine, but being here in New Orleans was increasingly uncomfortable in a physically literal sense. I felt as if I had to fight taking to the sky to go to Sookie and to hell with the consequences.

As we stood to leave, Pam clutched at my arm and leaned in to whisper to me, her distress evident only through our bond. "Eric, maybe they will accept me as her Maker instead? I don't like the bitch, but it isn't fair to you to have to do this." She knew better than to say the words where we were, but I could feel her internal reaction: _fucking Authority._

I raised an eyebrow at my progeny. "And exactly how would you treat Tara as a Maker, Pam?"

Pam's face darkened. "The little twat would learn the meaning of punishment. I would make her life a living hell for what she and those witches did to us. And I'd have a whole month to do it before she could even look forward to the True Death," she added spitefully.

I sighed and then put my hand on Pam's cheek. "And that is exactly why it's better for me to be her Maker, Pam. I have my reasons for doing as the Magister asked, and using it as an excuse to torture Tara Thornton is not one of them."

Pam stared at me before saying, "Eric, you are _still_ not truly back to yourself, are you? Those goddamn witches and that fucking –"

I hastily pressed my fingers across her lips to silence her. "Don't make me command you, Pam. I'm sure I'll have enough of that with Tara in the next few days. But understand me here: you are not going to give your new _sibling_ shit." At her rebellious look, I compromised. "At least not more than she can stand. And _I _will be the one who determines what that is."

Pam shook her head and walked away, just as the Magister approached me. "Sheriff, we should talk logistical details." She looked relieved and pleased that things were going according to her plan.

"After we do that, may I see my would-be progeny? I'd like to talk to her before we perform the procedure." I glanced at the Magister's face. "Establish a few ground rules."

Magister Kader smiled. "Certainly, Sheriff."

**~*E&S*~**

Tara was lying in a huddle on the cot in her cell when they let me in. I lowered myself lightly onto the edge of the bed, careful not to move too close to her too quickly. It was clear that she had been weeping again.

"Tara." I kept my voice soft and non-threatening. "I want to talk to you about what is going to happen."

She slowly struggled to sit up and edged away from me further on the narrow mattress. "You're going to finally get a chance to kill me is what is going to happen," she ground out. "Just like you wanted. But it's going to get me what I need out of it, so fuck you."

"Now, _there's_ the Tara Thornton I am familiar with," I said with a half-smile. "I'm glad to see you haven't completely lost your spirit. You're going to need it after you've been made vampire."

"Not for long. Y'all can stake me or put me in the sun to fry the minute that month is up. Or maybe I'll do it myself before that and let you get in trouble with that head honcho in there. That could be fun, even if I won't be around to see it." Tara glared at me, a spark of her normal defiance back in her eyes.

"That is not going to happen, Tara. The moment we're up tomorrow night, I'm going to have to command you not to harm yourself – at least for a month. You will find it physically impossible not to obey me." I shrugged. "After the month is over, we'll see. If you're that unhappy, I may let you do what you wish. But, Tara –" I leaned a little closer, trying to engage her. "—I'm hoping that you won't find being a vampire as bad as you fear. That you'll adapt."

Tara snorted. "Oh, because I've always _wanted_ to be a fucking blood-sucking murderer," she said, her voice dripping in sarcasm. "I know you know why I'm doing this, and it isn't because I _want_ to be one of you evil motherfuckers."

"So, don't _be_ an evil motherfucker," I replied bluntly. "One thing you need to understand, Tara, is that vampires, just like humans, are what we _choose_ to be so long as they have freedom. Becoming vampire doesn't do anything to the kind of person you are inside. This is not 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' and vampires don't lose their souls when they are turned." I looked at her earnestly. "You will still be able to make choices after you are turned."

"Oh, except the choice not to _eat_ people!" Tara spat.

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Hey, you want to fill up on TruBlood, be my guest, but you're going to find it tastes like shit. But unlike meat-eating humans, you will not _have_ to kill to eat. Since the Great Revelation, there are many people willing to let vampires feed on them, even without glamour. Pam and I will teach you how to do it so that you don't harm anyone you don't want to." I shot her a glance. "Of course, if you _do _want to hurt someone, you're going to be able to because of your increased abilities. But whether you use that power is going to be your call once I am satisfied you are self-controlled enough to manage it. Like I said, a lot of what is to come is going to be your choice. I'm going to teach you to survive the best way I know how."

Tara's eyes narrowed at me. "You're going 'teach me to survive'?" she asked skeptically. "You trying to tell me you're not planning on killing me the very second you are able to?"

"I have never killed a progeny and prefer not to start," I answered.

She snorted. "So, you're just going to torture me in that basement dungeon of yours, then? Make me just _wish_ I was dead?" She glared defiantly at me.

"That would be Pam's idea of how to treat you," I said honestly. "But, no, I'm planning on treating you the way I would any child of mine. And I'm not big on torturing family members."

Tara frowned at me. "After what I did, turning you over to Marnie? Taking you to that rally to kill other vampires? You trying to tell me you're going to forgive that?" She sounded skeptical.

I sat and studied her silently as I thought about how to answer that. "I'd be lying if I didn't tell you I'm still pretty pissed off about it," I finally said. "And, in the past, yes, I'd probably have killed you for it and not regretted it for a moment."

There was a fleeting expression of triumph on Tara's face.

"But I'm willing to overlook a lot for Sookie's sake," I continued. "What you've agreed to do…I know why you're doing it and I value that. Enough to let bygones be bygones between us."

Tara regarded me doubtfully.

I hesitated for a moment. "That and what Sookie said to you in her living room about me having changed was true," I explained tentatively. "Not quite the way she thought when she said it, because I can't claim to be the innocent I was when I was with her. I remember everything I did now and I can't deny that. But while I can't undo the past, I _can_ try to do things differently in the future. Not just because I love Sookie – and I do – but because she showed me something about myself I didn't like. Whether she ends up loving me or not, that's something I need to deal with."

Tara speculated, her eyes narrowed, "So, you're going to help me become some kind of 'good' vampire so you can show Sookie how much you've changed or something?"

Apparently my new progeny was going to rival her elder sister for cynicism. At least my century with Pam had given me experience in dealing with this level of pessimism.

"At the moment, she's told me to stay the hell away from her, and frankly, I don't think telling her I've turned her best friend is going to win any points with her immediately," I replied drily. "Although I'm hoping she'll eventually understand _why_ both you and I made this choice and get past it."

"Yeah, it would kind of suck if I end up a vampire and you become my vampire daddy for eternity for her sake and she never spoke to either of us again," Tara finally muttered.

The very thought of Sookie never speaking to me again sent a sharp pang through my heart – and through the bond. I felt Sookie react, tentatively tracing the pain back to me, and I very deliberately took a deep breath to calm myself. I couldn't afford the persistent tug of the bond to distract me from what needed to be done here and now to protect the woman on the other end of it. I concentrated on subtly but firmly damping down my awareness of the connection again. I was finding that the key was to be focused on other things.

Trying to redirect my attention away from Sookie, I asked Tara a question I had been wondering about since we were in the Council chamber. "Why did you refuse Bill's offer to be your Maker?"

"I don't trust Bill Compton," Tara replied flatly. "I asked him once for help when I knew I was going to die without it, and he flat out told me 'no' – and meant it. Then he nearly drained Sookie dry even though he supposedly _loved _her while doing it." She shot me a look. "And I'm not stupid. I'm guessing he got all that money and power he got in the last year by doing _something_ to somebody. Probably somebody who trusted him only to end up stabbed in the back." She shook her head. "No way I was gonna take a chance on trusting him."

"Don't tell me you trusted memore than him," I said. "Because I won't believe it after the way you went after me with that fire poker in Sookie's house. So why didn't you object to my being your Maker?"

Tara shrugged. "Better the devil you know, I guess. I don't know any of these other vampires except Pam and you _know_ that woman hates me much as I hate her." Tara picked at the blanket on her cot with her fingers before continuing slowly, "And I was thinking, while it may be that Sookie is wrong about you changing, at least there was a slim chance it _could_ be true." She looked up at me. "You didn't kill me that night in her house when you could have. And you didn't kill me in the hotel when you probably _should_ have, after what I did." Tara looked down at the bed and shrugged again. "You were the best choice out of a lot of really shitty options, basically."

I felt my mouth twist up in a wry smile. "Tara Thornton, if that's the way you think as a human, you are going to make one hell of a vampire. You're clearly a natural at surviving and that's what vampires do best."

I was prepared to sacrifice anything to protect Sookie – but I was suddenly optimistic that taking Tara Thornton as a child might not be as big a sacrifice as I had feared.

**~*E&S*~**

Before I left Tara's cell, I made sure she understand exactly what was going to happen – including disconcertingly having to reassure her at one point that I did not intend to have sex with her as part of the turning process.

Tara said it was something she'd seen on one of those TV shows where lots of screaming and fistfights broke out, with the theme on the day she'd watched being "My Maker made me a sex slave!"

I was somewhat affronted as I pointed out that, no matter what I had done in order to feed over the course of 1,000 years, I had never, while living or undead, had to either force _or_ glamour a woman into sex, and I wasn't about to start with _her._

Nora was waiting for me in my room when I finally returned.

"Eric, what the fuck is going on?" My sister almost reached out to touch me, but the memory of what had happened the last time must have stopped her at the last moment, as her hand stalled in mid-air before dropping restlessly to her side. "What did the Magister say to you to force you to do this?"

"She didn't force me," I answered honestly. "She proposed it as a PR-friendly solution and I agreed."

"Oh, as if _you've_ suddenly become an apologist for the human-rights cause," Nora spluttered. Her eyes narrowed at me. "Or have you? Is that something else to do with whatever those fucking witches did to you?" She closed her eyes in frustration. "I swear to you, Eric, I will not _stop_ until I find out what kind of spell was put on you and you are put back to rights. And then I don't care if I am violating every Mainstreaming tenet there is, I'm going to make whoever had anything to do with what happened to you – whoever broke you like this – pay. Including your new progeny as soon as I'm able."

_The fuck she would._ I bit my tongue to keep from snarling at Nora in Tara's defense. Whatever my own concerns about the situation, my bloodline was _mine_ and not to be touched by anyone, even my own sister. "Nora, let it rest. I have my reasons to cooperate with the Magister," I gritted out.

"Is it a lead in figuring out what sort of magic was used on you?" Nora looked hopeful. "If that's so, I suppose I must let you do what you think is best for now. I did promise." Her eyes regarded me with concern. "But Eric, it is just so hard to see you so changed. And for that horrid, human-loving Byzantine _cow_ to _use_ you this way when you're not yourself –" She bit off what she was saying, dropping her voice lower. "If things continue in this direction, I don't know how much longer the Guardian will be able to hold sway over the rest of the Council," she said, her voice serious and grim. "To desecrate the blood – _our blood_, Eric – by making that dismal creature one of us is just unspeakable. Not that I will hold _you_ accountable for that desecration. No, this is all because of the Guardian and his increasingly radical notions." Nora twisted her hands together.

I frowned. "Are you telling me that the Guardian's position is not secure?" I asked warily.

"He's just pushing us so far beyond what anyone ever expected in regard to our relationship to humans," Nora muttered, almost to herself. "He seems to have forgotten the rightful order of things." She glanced up at me and collected herself. "I'm just afraid of what is to come, brother, if he doesn't become more…moderate in his beliefs."

"Nora," I said after a moment of silence. "Are you going to be safe here? You're not involved in anything dangerous, are you?" For all the things I had withheld from her in order to protect Sookie, Nora was still my sister and I was suddenly afraid for her safety in this pit of vampire vipers.

"I'll be fine," she answered absently. She glanced up at me. "This situation just has me overwrought. But I guess it can't be helped. For now." She shook her head wearily. "Eric, I will not be there to see you turn this woman. I just can't stomach it. But I wish you well, brother." Once again, she reached out to touch me, but again stopping herself and I saw frustration flash across her face. "Let me know if I can help you in any way once you are back home in Shreveport. And keep me posted on whatever you find out about the magics still affecting you." She turned and left.

With a heavy sigh, I sank onto the edge of the bed in my room. I had loved Nora as a sister, lover and friend for nearly 600 years, and while we had argued before, I had never felt so distant from her as I did at this moment. She kept railing at me about how I had changed, and I couldn't disagree. And while it disappointed me that Nora and I were shifting apart as a result, I couldn't undo what Sookie had done to me, to my heart. I _wouldn't_ undo it.

**~*E&S*~**

A couple of hours before dawn, I stood beside a large dirt hole in a field on the outskirts of New Orleans. Tara stood beside me, freshly showered and wearing a clean set of clothes as I had requested, although I had heard one guard mutter that it seemed a waste of both clean water and clothing since we were both just going to ground so shortly. The Magister was there to oversee things and Pam had also joined us, although I think her motivation was a vain hope that some miracle would happen and circumstances would change.

"I'll return with your progeny – with your eldest progeny, that is, this evening. Once we are assured all is well, you will be free to return to your home territory," Chancellor Kader explained. "Are you both ready?"

I could hear Tara's heart beating, hard and fast, but she answered resolutely, "As ready as I'm going to be."

I hesitated and then asked Tara directly, "Are you sure you don't want to be glamoured? Just to take the pain away?" The Magister had made it clear that it would be permitted if that was what either Tara or I wanted.

"No," she answered. "I want to remember what it feels like. So I know afterwards what I'm going to be doing to people."

Pam rolled her eyes in disgust.

I leaned in close to Tara, and said, only for her to hear, "I won't forget why you are doing this. And I don't want you to forget why I am. I'm doing this for Sookie – but once you are my child, you will be mine to protect. So don't be afraid."

Tara Thornton simply closed her eyes, trembling, as she raised her chin to give me better access to her neck.

And then I bit.

**A/N: There really is a specific reason for me going here, I promise! And it has to do with plot advancement in a way that is good for Eric and Sookie, not bad. Next chapter we will be back in Bon Temps - and hopefully, Eric will finally be back by the end of the chapter, although Sookie has been up to some things while he's been gone. Special shout out to eys1214 for supporting what I am sure is to be a controversial decision. Love you, my friend!**

**UPDATE: I write this for fun and I write this to entertain myself. I've also been completely tolerant of negative reviews up until this point. I have had "Guest" reviews set to be moderated for months, although I have generally let them autopost within 36 hours or whatever the default is. I rarely log in an manually approve them, so you may have to wait to see an unsigned review post and it has never been an issue until recently. But suddenly, I'm getting a handful of reviews that verge on personal attacks and which are - OF COURSE! - unsigned. So, new policy. If you want to post something rude and nasty in response to my story, so long as you sign it, fine. I'm willing to let it stand. But I have no intention of approving "attack" reviews if you don't have the guts to sign it. There are nearly 8,000 SVM/TB stories on for you to read and if you don't like mine, you have a lot of other things to choose from. Go choose one and I hope you DO enjoy that one. **


	9. Chapter 9: Chasing Threads

**Chapter 9: Chasing Threads**

Sookie

One good thing about only me and Lafayette hearing exactly what Godric had said – I had been able to shoot Lafayette a cautioning look when Sam started to ask what the fuck had just happened. By the time Alcide had wandered back into the bar, wondering what was taking me so long, I had kept the explanation short and to the point. Eric's maker had a message for Eric, and Godric had suggested that as a witch, Jesus could help me answer a question about a related magical issue. I didn't say it outright, but my attitude suggested this was really all Eric's business and the less either Sam or Alcide knew about it, the better for them.

Maybe in different circumstances, Alcide might have pressed more on the subject, but I could tell from the thoughts that were practically blasting from his head that he and Debbie had argued some more in the parking lot. His head was all tangled up with frustration about his own problems, not mine, much less Eric's.

Starting my car and driving off into the quiet Halloween night towards home, Alcide following my car in his truck, I was more aware of the nagging, insistent tug of my connection with Eric. He was still to my southeast, far in the distance, and he was a knot of tension and apprehension, with an undercurrent of constant worry for me. Every now and again, I'd feel a little jolt of heightened anxiety followed by a cautious sense of relief, like someone picking their way carefully through a minefield and so far avoiding being blown to bits.

As I zoomed along the dark country roads towards my house, I thought about what Godric had said. Something was going on with the vampires. Maybe that was why Eric was so tense? Or was he always like this in dealing with the Powers That Be in the vampire world? _Or is it because of me?_ I thought guiltily. Maybe before he'd gotten tangled up with me, his relationship with the Vampire Authority hadn't been all that complicated.

Whatever was happening with the vampires, Godric seemed to think that this bond between Eric and me would not only help us fight it, but was important to more than just the two of us. Ever since I realized how strong the bond was, all I'd been thinking about was how unprepared I was to be so closely bound to another person and how frightening some of the side effects were – not because anything had actually _hurt _me, I realized, but because the new sensations were just so darned _powerful._ It was overwhelming to have all of those new feelings and abilities so unexpectedly pulsing through me. But if Godric was telling me the truth – and I couldn't think of a reason why his ghost would lie to me – then the power that had been unleashed by the bond was in both Eric's and my hands, if we could learn to control it.

I couldn't even imagine how Eric and I could 'change everything' for both vampires and 'my' kind, which seemed in Godric's mind to be more my fae relatives than my human ones, but he'd been pretty clear that he believed in the power of our bond to do that. And what did he mean about me and Eric now 'sharing our gifts' with each other? If I could already feel Pam's emotions – at least a little bit – and could see Godric's ghost, did that mean Eric was going to start reading human minds and was I going to be able to fly through the air when the bond was 'completed'? Whatever in the frilly heck _that_ meant.

One thing I did know: if Godric felt compelled to come to me in spirit to pass on this information to Eric, it had to mean that Eric really hadn't understood what he was triggering by exchanging blood with me. Maybe what he had told me before he left for the Vampire Authority – that he had only wanted to give me a way to know what he really felt so I would learn to trust him – was really true. He hadn't known the full effects of what the bond would do to us.

Heck, maybe _nobody_ did. Had a vampire and a fae-human hybrid ever bonded like this before? Even though Eric had shown complete self-restraint the few times he had drunk from me, he himself had told me that my blood was alluring to vampires. I somehow doubted there had been very many vampire/fae couples throughout history to start with, since the whole getting-drained-by-your-lover thing had to put a crimp on a relationship.

No, Eric and I seemed to be in new territory as far as vampire/fae-human relations were concerned, and apparently, he was only slightly less ignorant of what to expect than I was.

So, how were we going to figure out how the bond worked? I had thought that by sending him away, somehow the bond was going to go away with him, but obviously that was not the case. No, instead I was left blindly having all the feelings and experiences of the bond without any context to put them in, which just made it that much more confusing. Now that I understood that, it made more sense to me that I should try to spend _more_ time with Eric so I could put together what I could see happening with what I was feeling.

As soon as he was back from the Authority, maybe we could start over with the whole 'getting to know you' thing.

Unless it was already too late. I hadn't felt any more mixed sensations of love and lust for someone _not me_ coming from Eric, but I hadn't forgotten about them. Who was there in the Authority with him that provoked those feelings? What if something else happened between them before he came home? While I kept feeling Eric was worried for me, wanting me to be safe and still wanting us to be emotionally bonded were two different things. Maybe by the time he came home, _he_ would be the one chafing at our connection, especially if it was keeping him from someone else he cared about. My heart skipped a beat at the thought I may have pushed him away too harshly with my anger and that he may have his own regrets about our relationship.

_Zing!_ I gasped as I felt a sudden, sharp emotional pang in my heart, as if I had just unexpectedly plummeted from the top of a roller coaster. I instinctively raised my foot from the gas pedal, shaken by the way my stomach had dropped, only to quickly level again.

_Eric._ Something had just caused him sharp and sudden emotional pain. It wasn't huge – I didn't get the sense he'd had a big shock or anything – but something had definitely gotten through his control and pricked at his heart.

I carefully increased the pressure on the gas again as I reached out through the bond, gingerly probing. The stinging, painful feeling lasted only a few more seconds before I felt Eric sense my concern and respond by damping down his feelings. Where a moment before there had been a red-hot flash of hurt, now there was only a faint throb that grew more flat and muffled by the moment, until I felt nothing but a faint numbness.

He was shutting me out – and I didn't like the way it felt.

Maybe it was because I had just been thinking about how he might be starting to regret our connection, but instead of embracing his withdrawal, I wanted nothing more than to chase the thread of that pain back to Eric and figure out what I could do to take it away. That was what people who cared about each other – who _loved_ each other – did, right? They tried to face things together and help each other cope with the hurts of life. Suddenly I felt impatient to do what I felt I needed to, an almost primal urge to be there for him whether he wanted me there or not.

A sudden flash of lights in my rear view mirror startled me and I realized that, from behind me, the horn of Alcide's truck was blaring in rapid-fire honks as his headlights flashed on and off. Frowning and still disoriented by my focus on Eric, I pulled over to the side of the road to regain my composure. Alcide's truck stopped behind me and before I knew it, he was out and jogging towards me.

"Alcide, what the hell?" I called as I rolled my car window down. "Why are you flashing your lights and honking at me like a maniac? Is something wrong?"

Alcide was huffing as he skidded to a stop beside the car and grabbed the edge of the car's roof to lean in towards my open window. "Why don't _you_ tell _me_, Sook? Where the fuck are you going?" he growled. "You sailed right past the end of Hummingbird Road a couple of miles back and were picking up speed like you were hell bent on getting out of town. We're headed straight for I-10 and if you're planning on going somewhere other than Bon Temps tonight, I would appreciate you telling me so."

Shocked, I looked around and sure enough, Alcide was right; I had started heading out of town, automatically going towards the highway that would take me south.

_Towards Eric_.

Now that I had stopped, I could feel the magnetic pull inside me urging me to get back on the road, to keep going in the direction I knew Eric was. _To go to him._

Looking up at Alcide's frustrated face, I stuttered out, "I'm sorry, Alcide. I was –" _Trying to follow the trail to Eric._ I gripped the steering wheel tighter, fighting the desire to pull back out onto the road and take off again. "—I was distracted. And geez, you couldn't have called me on my cell phone instead of honking and flashing your lights at me?"

"I turned my phone off before we left the bar," he gritted. _Thanks to Debbie and their fight_, I could tell from his head. "And you were speeding up, so I didn't want to be scrambling to turn it on while trying to keep up with your lead foot. Seriously, Sookie, where in the hell did you think you were going?" Alcide was frowning at me in consternation.

"I don't know," I answered honestly. At least, I didn't know what city or town, even if I knew the direction. Which reminded me, I still wanted to see if I could figure out where Eric was, based on when I had felt him rise earlier in the evening. Even though I knew I only needed to follow my gut and I'd find him, that might not always be practical. Like right now, when my head knew I should stay put for my own safety, even if my heart was tugging at me. "I'll get us turned around and we can head back to the house. I'm sorry," I said, contrite.

"I'll follow you back," Alcide answered, straightening and running one big hand through his dark hair. He didn't say it out loud, but I heard it in his head, clear as a bell, that he was glad he hadn't lost me in his own distraction after the fight with Debbie because he was pretty sure Eric would _not_ have been pleased.

"I promise I'll stay put in the house the rest of the night," I blurted out, as much to remind myself that that was the smartest thing to do as to reassure him he wouldn't have to chase me anywhere else.

My hand shook as I restarted my car. If Eric and I did start to spend time with each other to figure out the bond, what in the hell were we going to do about the more problematic things we already knew about, like the foggy feeling when we touched or this intense desire to follow him, even into danger? How would we learn anything if we were all stoned on each other's presence? Heck, how would we do _anything_ in that state? I still had a job to show up for and Eric had a business to run. I didn't think calling off work (if I even remembered to) because I was feeling all crazy in love with a vampire would satisfy Sam, much less pay for groceries.

Thinking about how I had been rocketing down the road towards Eric without even being conscious of it, I realized that my talk with Jesus about any help he could offer with the bond needed to be sooner rather than later. If Eric and I were simply left to our own devices, who knows what might happen? No, we needed outside help on this.

When we got back to my house, Alcide made a point of checking the property both inside and out (and finding nothing, which I could have told him by the lack of either human or vampire minds in the area) before we settled in for the night. After what happened out on the road, I thought guiltily that it was probably as important for him to keep me _in_ the house as to keep anyone dangerous to me _out_, so when he asked for bedding for the couch, I didn't argue. He said he thought he would hear more from the living room than in the guest room if anything happened, and I silently hoped that would include any noise I might make if I suddenly got a middle-of-the-night urge to go to Eric again. At least with Alcide in the house, I might have a chance of waking up before getting too far down the driveway in my nightgown.

Once Alcide was settled (although the couch was not quite long enough for his giant frame), I wished him a good night and wandered up to my own bed. As I slid in between the cool sheets, I felt for Eric again. He didn't seem to be actively trying to keep me out any more (which was some consolation) but he did seem focused and resolute, with just the tiniest hints of anticipated relief, as if the end of whatever trial he was being put to was almost in sight. After the way he had emotionally evaded me earlier, I felt a little shy about being too intrusive, but it didn't stop me from sending him a low-key but firm conviction in his strength to carry him through.

As I closed my eyes and pressed my cheek to my pillow, I reluctantly wondered what was going on with Tara. I had such mixed feelings about my oldest friend that I had barely let myself think about what she had to be experiencing in the hands of the vampires. I couldn't justify her actions with that crazy group of hate-filled witches, especially the way she had tried to use Eric to hurt people. People had died because of what she did, not just Nan Flanagan and that other vampire Sheriff, but some completely innocent humans, too, and I felt that was wrong. But at the same time, I was pretty sure that by killing Miss Flanagan she had saved me from being taken to vampire headquarters myself.

I guess it didn't make me the best of Christians, but while I did feel bad about Nan Flanagan having died, my regret wasn't so strong that I would have given up my freedom in exchange for it. No, I was _glad_ I wasn't with the vampires, and I did have Tara to thank for that, no matter what else she had done. But even with Eric having promised to try to do something for her if he saw an opportunity, I knew that the chances of her surviving a vampire trial were slim. About the only thing I could hope for her at this point was that the vampires would not be completely brutal in their punishment of her.

So, as I fell asleep, I did the only thing I knew to do for my childhood friend: I prayed to God for the vampires to show her some mercy.

**~*E&S*~**

I woke up to the smell of coffee and pancakes the next morning. I groggily rolled under my blankets as the scents drifted into my bedroom from downstairs and I blinked at my clock, which showed it was well after 10 a.m. As tired as I had been the night before, it had taken awhile for me to drift off to sleep because my mind kept jumping from one thing to another. And when I finally had slept, I'd had strange dreams. I couldn't remember many details, but I felt as if one had involved blood, and in another, I'd been sleeping buried in the dirt like a vampire. That one had seemed especially weird when I finally woke up, because I remembered feeling surprisingly comfortable with the soil nestled around me, like I was tucked under a particularly cozy quilt on a cold winter's morning and had been reluctant to crawl out of my snug (earthen) bed.

As the sensations of my dreams drifted away, I automatically felt for Eric. He was obviously in his day sleep, which today seemed somehow heavier and deeper than I remembered it. I probed the bond cautiously just as I had the previous day, but this time, there was no answering response to my gentle nudging. Eric seemed to be out cold (so to speak). It was not a bad feeling, necessarily, but noticeably different from the day before. Hopeful that it meant he was getting some much-needed rest, I gently withdrew and rolled my own sluggish self out of my blankets.

Alcide had made himself at home in my kitchen and stood sipping coffee from one of my grandma's favorite cups, pancakes browning on the stove. "Morning, Sook," he rumbled. "I checked on you earlier and you were dead to the world. I wondered if my cooking might lure you out of bed."

"I don't normally sleep this late," I admitted. "Even hanging out with vampires as much as I do, I still like my sunshine, and mornings are the best." I yawned. "I do feel more tired than usual this morning, though. Maybe this week is just finally catching up with me."

Alcide grunted and flipped a pancake over in the pan before offering me coffee. As he finished fixing breakfast, we had the usual sort of morning talk about how the two of us had slept (both restlessly, me because of my dreams and him because of the inadequate size of my couch) and plans for the day. I told him I needed to talk to Lafayette and Jesus about some magic stuff and he squinted at me over a forkful of pancake. "This to do with that message for Eric?" he finally asked. "I would think both you and him would have had enough of witches after what happened to him with that coven in Shreveport. Nothing personal against Jesus and Lafayette, but I think _all_ y'all would want to stay the hell away from magic after all that."

I sighed, my hands curled around the heat of my coffee cup. "Alcide, I'm from Bon Temps. Seems to me that we don't have to go _looking_ for magic here – it comes looking for _us,_ whether we want it to or not." I took a sip of my hot coffee. "I can't blame people who want to know how to handle it when it comes callin'. And in this case, that knowledge might help Eric." _And me._

Alcide shrugged in a begrudging agreement and then cut another piece of pancake with his fork. "Well, don't take this the wrong way, but the less I know about Eric Northman's business, magical or otherwise, the better, so I'll try to make myself scarce while your Wicca friends are here. I'll still be around, but I'll hang out on the porch or something."

"Deal," I murmured, taking a big bite of fluffy pancake. "And speaking of magic, mister, what did you do to these pancakes? These are almost as good as my gran's – _almost_."

Alcide grunted. "It's the melted butter in the batter. Makes 'em fluffy as hell. Trick my father showed me once." Then we talked about the various merits of pancakes versus ho cakes.

And for the little bit of time that passed while Alcide and I ate breakfast and talked about simple things, I forgot all about vampire politics and whatever was going on with Eric to my southeast and just enjoyed the sunshine and coffee.

**~*E&S*~**

When Lafayette and Jesus came over by the mid-afternoon, Alcide made good on his promise to go outside for a bit (and try to call Debbie, I heard from his head). I started to lead the way to the cupboard that hid the entrance to Eric's cubby but stopped when I noticed Lafayette and Jesus hanging back, a chorus of thoughts breaking out as they shot significant looks at one another.

"Ask me what?" I asked. I stopped and crossed my arms. "I can hear you both thinking about whether Lafayette should ask me something, so you might as well spit it out."

"Sook," Lafayette began, "You took the mystical mojo off of Tara's mind that time Maryann fucked up her head with her black-eyed juju. Do you think you might be able to break a vampire glamour the same way?"

"Why do you want to know?" I asked cautiously, glancing at Jesus. Both men had been glamoured by vampires after the tolerance rally, but from what Jesus had said last night, it hadn't worked on him for reasons I still didn't understand. Last I knew, Jesus hadn't yet fessed up to his boyfriend that he remembered what _really_ happened at that rally, mostly because he didn't know how to tell Lafayette about the deep trouble Tara was in without freaking the cook out.

You would have thought Jesus was the mind reader instead of me, as quick as he responded to my look his way. "I told him what's going on with Tara after we went home last night," he explained. "I couldn't stand the thought that she might _show up_ when he didn't expect her to." _Show up as a ghost_ if the vampires executed her, I knew he meant.

"Not that it would surprise me all that much if that girl showed up as a ghost at some point, but that the fucking AVL has her was a _kinda big_ secret to be keeping from me. And we ain't gonna keep those _kinda big_ secrets from each other anymore, now, _is we_, lover?" Lafayette murmured to his boyfriend with a sidelong glance.

Jesus looked chastised and squeezed Lafayette's hand with his own. "No, baby, you're right. We shouldn't be keeping stuff from each other. Even if we think it is protecting the other person."

The two men had obviously had quite a long talk at some point during the night to clear the air between them after what happened at the bar. But isn't that what couples _did_? Try to share things and work out problems _together_?

Yeah, Eric and I definitely needed to have a talk when he got back. If he was still willing, that is.

"I know we couldn't a walked out of that hotel without the vamps clearing our heads," Lafayette continued, "but I think I'd rather know what I'm dealing with now. 'Specially if _some_ spirits gonna _keep_ comin' round, like your vampire friend." Lafayette looked at me. "Jesus says I made his acquaintance the other night at that rally but the glamour wiped all that out. So what you say, Sook, you willing to try to undo that vampire whammy on me?"

"If you're sure, Lafayette. I'm willing to try," I responded. I led my two friends to the seating area of the living room, and made myself comfortable on the couch with Lafayette, my hands gently placed on either side of his head.

Maybe my light powers were getting stronger or the bond with Eric had boosted my ability to undo what vampires did, but it didn't take me very long at all to clear away all the cobwebs and fog of the glamour Bill had placed on Lafayette. Not that it helped too much with memories about the medium's possession by Jesus's Uncle Luca or Godric in the hotel ballroom – I could tell that those details were still hazy at best.

"Fuck!" Lafayette burst out as the memories of Tara's actions at the Dorchester Hotel came back to him. "Jesus fucking Christ, girl, what the hell was you thinking?" I knew that was not directed at me, but at his memory of Tara. He had begun to tremble and I could hear in his unsteady breathing how shaken he was to have the memories back.

"Sorry, Lala, I think that is the best I'm going to do," I finally said, dropping my hands from his head to rest reassuringly on his knees.

"Damn, damn, damn," Lala groaned. "The vamps kept me for two weeks just for dealing V, and I swear Eric would have put me down for it if it wasn't for you stepping in, Sookie," he said. "There ain't no _way_ Tara's getting out of that situation alive after killing high-up vamps." His dark faced had turned ashen with distress.

"Two weeks? I thought you said Eric Northman only had you for three days," Jesus burst out just as I blurted, "You were _dealing_ V? From where? Oh my God, Lafayette, tell me you weren't a drainer!" My fingers clutched at the cook's knees involuntarily and I felt him jerk in response. In Jesus's mind, I could hear the witch was as stunned as I was, although he had known his boyfriend was involved in V trafficking. _How_ Lafayette had gotten his hands on the V was something Jesus apparently hadn't previously thought too deeply about.

Lafayette shifted and I lifted my hands from his legs, suddenly conscious of how my fingers had pinched him in my upset. "I had this vampire friend, Eddie, who used to share a couple of vials of his blood with me whenever I'd, uh, visit," he confessed, and in his mind, I saw the memory of a doughy, middle-aged vampire who looked as if he might have been an accountant in his human life. "I never would have hurt Eddie," Lafayette insisted. "And what we had was a mutual, err, exchange thing. But when he disappeared, I guess Eric found out about our little arrangement and thought I might be the cause of it. But it _wasn't me _that took him."

Clear as could be, I saw my brother's face pop into Lafayette's head.

"What does Jason have to do with this Eddie?" I demanded, my heart suddenly tripping with anxiety.

Lafayette hesitated but then said, "Sook, I never hads no proof or nothin', but I think your brother might have been the one who took Eddie outta his house. Back when he was hangin' with that crazy Amy girl and all that was going on." _Amy being murdered_, I knew he meant. "And I gots my reasons to believe Eddie is definitely among the_ truly dead_ undead now." Lafayette looked unhappy.

"That can't be right," I said, numb. "I mean, I know Jason had used V back then and was getting into some nasty stuff –" _Like stealing my gran's candlesticks to buy drugs._ "— but you can't be saying he drained this Eddie guy?"

Lafayette shook his head. "Sook, I honest to God just don't know. I just know that Eddie got snatched from his house and I found some evidence in the hallway that made it look like your dickhead brother was involved. I just know Jason's lucky Eric Northman didn't snatch _him_ and throw _his _ass in that shithole vampire dungeon when all that was goin' down."

I felt sick. I had been outraged when I found out Eric had my friend in his basement, but if Eric had suspected Lafayette of being a drainer – well, it was a surprise that Eric had kept him alive as long as he did. And my brother, if he actually _had _taken that vamp, maybe even drained him –

I shuddered. I had always thought drainers were monsters, and my encounter with the Rattrays had proved it, so it was hard to get my head around the idea that we could be talking about _my own brother_ doing something so terrible.

Eric couldn't have known or Jason would be dead, I was certain. And, honestly, if it had been some drainer I didn't know who had killed this Eddie, I'm not so sure I would have disagreed with Eric's decision to punish the drainer on principle. He was a Sheriff, after all.

"So Eric doesn't know Jason might have been involved?" I croaked.

Lafayette's sigh was heavy. "Sook, no point in lyin' to you since you gonna see it in my head anyhow." He shook his head. "Once I knew that Eric n' them thought that I had been the one what took Eddie, I told them I thought Jason was involved. Eric kind of brushed it off, though, cuz he was more interested at that point in knowing if I knew about any vampires missing in Dallas or really old vamp blood hitting the market."

"When Godric went missing," I guessed. "So Eric knew Jason might be involved with draining before he went to Dallas?" Jesus H, Eric might even have wondered early on if Jason was involved in taking Godric to the Fellowship of the Sun.

My brother was lucky that the first time Eric laid eyes on him in that church, he was carrying a paint ball gun and shooting at the right people, I realized.

"Anyhow, I figured that Eric and Jason must've squared things between them while y'all was down in Texas because your brother still _alive_," Lafayette said, raising his eyebrows.

"Jason helped rescue Godric," I answered. "Eric would forgive a lot for that." And obviously had, if Jason really had drained a vampire and Eric knew it yet looked the other way.

"And I guess he'd forgive a lot for your sake now, too, Sook," Lafayette said. "I wonder if Eric been able to help Tara at all like he said?" I could hear the sliver of hope in his voice.

"I believed him when he said he'd try," I replied. "Although, honestly, I don't know how much power he really has to help. The whole time Eric's been at that vampire headquarters, I've been able to feel what he's feeling, which is a whole lot of tension and anxiety. I don't think he's felt truly relaxed for a single moment he's been there. But I can't tell from the feelings what that all means for Tara."

"Well, I guess if they kill her, we'll find out soon enough," Lafayette said, his voice desolate. "But at least she ain't showed up here yet."

From beside his boyfriend, Jesus frowned at me. "Wait, did you say could feel Eric Northman's feelings? Is that part of what you wanted to talk to us about?"

Despite the two male witches having helped me rescue Eric at the rally, I hadn't filled them in on what had happened between Eric and me before he'd been taken. I had approached Bill for help in rescuing Eric before I'd turned to them, and Bill's reaction to the bond, once I had explained how I had been able to locate the missing Eric, made me feel like it wasn't something I was going to explain to anyone else until I had to.

I just didn't need the aggravation.

"It's part of it, yes," I began. "While Eric was in my house, we exchanged blood and he says it formed some kind of magical bond between us. I'm not even sure how we did it, but we can feel each other's feelings, and I can tell where he is all the time – at least, what direction he is in."

"You mean like when a vampire has a human's blood?" Jesus asked. "Only you're feeling it from a vampire?"

I nodded. "And that message Godric passed on through Lafayette last night? It was about how important this bond between me and Eric is and how we needed to find out all we could about it."

Jesus looked in surprise at Lafayette, who shrugged and said, "The details wasn't my secret to share, lover, so I didn't saying nothing about it last night. Other people's stuff that ain't really _our business_ don't count in our secret-sharing agreement far as I'm concerned. You okay with that?"

"No problem," Jesus agreed, rubbing Lafayette's knee.

I continued, "I don't know much about the bond except what Eric told me and I'm beginning to get the idea that even _he_ didn't really know what we were getting into before we did it. Jesus, since you know so much about magic, I'm hoping you might be able to help me – well, both me and Eric – figure out more."

Jesus replied, "Sookie, I don't know too much about vampire magic, but if you tell me exactly how you think the bond was formed, maybe it I'll have get some ideas about the magics involved."

I went through what I remembered of the day of the sun spell: me offering Eric my blood to heal him from his silver wounds, him offering me his blood in return even though I was not injured, how he had said, "We will be one," and the surreal experience after we had exchanged blood with one another. I didn't go into much detail on the sexy parts, just that when we had touched, our senses had seemed somehow gotten all scrambled up with colors and feelings and sounds, like some kind of psychedelic acid trip.

"I just figured I was high on vampire blood and he was high on fairy blood," I explained. "Jason once told me that when you did V with someone else, you could share experiences, so I figured that was what was going on. That maybe it was so powerful because Eric's blood was so old."

"I've had Eric Northman's blood," Lafayette volunteered. "And while it made me feel motherfuckin' fantastic, it ain't _never_ took me to no magical snowy woods. Jesus and me have had a couple of adventures together in Vland and we did have a little of that mixed-up-senses thing – but it also ended after the V trip ended." I caught a mental picture of a flash of a mask-like face in Lafayette's head. "Mostly, that is." Lafayette shifted uncomfortably. "Jesus says it probably is what opened up my ability as a medium, though. V brings out dah magic in you," he ended in a singsong voice, waving his hand with a flourish.

"Well, it seems like magic that is going to get both me and Eric killed if we let it have its way," I grumbled. "Any time we're together, we both seem to get all foggy and lost in each other like we're high all over again. I'm afraid that if we let it happen, something bad could be going on around us and we'd be oblivious."

"But it isn't a curse?" Jesus clarified. "Neither Eric or Godric talked about it that way, right?"

"No, Godric seemed to think the bond would be a good thing, not just for us but for 'both our kinds.'" I used my fingers to make air quotes as I lowered my voice to imitate Godric's solemn tone. "Once we complete it, anyhow."

Jesus frowned. "So the magical action of the bond is not completed yet?" The witch pondered for a moment before demanding, "Tell me again _exactly_ what was going on between you and Eric before the witches took him."

"Well, Eric I were, errr, in bed, after having a shower and we had gone to sleep, feeling less spacey than earlier but still kind of out of it, I guess," I answered.

I closed my eyes as I remembered how Eric had spooned his huge body against my back, one arm beneath my pillow and the other tucked securely around me, one huge hand pressed against my stomach. I felt a pang as I remembered how contented I had felt as he held me. "I fell into a really deep sleep that I think now must have been something Marnie did to me with magic, because I didn't wake up until after Eric was gone." My brows furrowed as I remembered what had followed. "I somehow just knew which direction Eric had gone in, so I threw some clothes on, jumped in my car and followed those feelings until I found him in that trailer. And when I figured out I couldn't do anything to help him on my own, I went to look for help, first from Bill and then you two, like you know."

"So, you were still feeling the effects of the magic when you went to bed, but Eric and you were separated when you woke up." Jesus looked thoughtful. "And now, anytime you're close together, you start going into some kind of altered state." The witch tilted his head slightly. "Sookie, maybe it's just the bond trying to finish forming. Do you have any idea how long it was supposed to take to complete the connection between you?"

"Noooo," I answered, "but maybe there's something in Eric's books about it." I explained about the collection of books Eric had in his cubby. "I did see a drawing in one of them that looked like it could have to do with our bond."

Jesus stood up. "Well, then let's go take a look."

I led the two witches down into Eric's cubby. Lafayette was the last to come down the ladder and I know from his thoughts that while he approved of Eric's decorating sensibility (especially that faux fur throw on the bed), he was never going to be a fan of basements. Just being below ground like this made him twitchy.

"Lafayette, you sure you're okay being down here?" I asked with concern. "If you want to wait upstairs while Jesus and I look through the books, you could do that."

"Nah, I'll go up if it gets to me," Lafayette responded. "But if you don't mind, I think I'd rather stay over here by the way out while you're looking at those books." He sank down to the floor near the ladder, and made himself comfortable against the wall.

Nothing like being reminded of Eric's past by the lingering effects of my friend's post-traumatic stress disorder. I tightened my lips. On the other hand, I had reason to think Eric really had _changed_ since he had held Lafayette prisoner. "Lafayette, I know this can't be easy for you and Jesus to help me out with this thing with Eric. But I appreciate your willingness to do it," I said.

"I'd rather have your boyfriend on my side than against me," Lafayette said frankly. "He made it clear that bygones was bygones after that rally, but I'd just as soon me and Jesus built up some more social capital with him while we can. And hope we never motherfuckin' need it."

"Fair enough," I nodded. I gestured to the stack of books by Eric's bed. "Jesus, Godric said you might not know the language, but that you should be able to understand some of the magical symbols." I knelt down by the bedside table and rifled through the volumes until I found the one I had noticed earlier. "Here's the one that I saw yesterday." I handed the book to Jesus as he seated himself on the bed.

I leaned over and helped the witch flip through the pages until I finally spotted the drawing I had seen when tidying up the cubby. "See that one with the couple exchanging blood?" _And other bodily fluids_. "That looks kind of like what Eric and I did." My cheeks flamed pink as I took in the erotic details of the sketch again. With the bond tugging persistently on me the last few days – and the way thinking of Eric _at all_ plucked at the sensitive areas between my thighs – I was finding the picture increasingly arousing. I wanted to avert my eyes, but instead I found them lingering on the ecstatic expressions of the couple. I could almost picture the motion of their hips as they rocked against one another, drawing one another's essences in through their mouths, through their –

"Oh, girl, I caught that blush. Do I want to see this artwork?" Lafayette rolled up onto his feet from his perch by the ladder as I flushed and finally looked away from the drawing. "Or is it nasty?" He approached cautiously until he could peer over Jesus's shoulder. "Uh-huh, looks like one of them dreams you have after a vampire gives you his blood, alright." He slid lightly onto the edge of the bed nearest the ladder as he leaned in for a closer look. "Gots to say, for all I'm not into doing vamps these days now that I gots my sweet baby Jesus, that sex looks _hot, _mmm-hmmmm."

I licked my lips and tried to focus on the _very important reason_ we were looking at vampire erotica. "You see that word there? _Blóðfesta? _That looks kind of like the word Eric has used to refer to our bond," I said, tapping the word below the sketch with the tip of my finger.

Jesus was studying the picture intently. "Looks Scandinavian to me, but I couldn't tell you which language. I'd guess the _blóð _part of the word might mean 'blood,'but I don't have a clue about the _festa_ part." He peered closely at the tiny halo of three crescents that floated over the entwined couple, then touched a finger to one of the fulsome arcs and glanced up at me. "These little moon-like symbols look like an indicator of magical timing. Three of them indicates that the magic would require a time element of three … _somethings._"

"Well, if they're moons, could it mean three months?" Lafayette asked.

I had a mental picture of Eric and I intimately entangled, lost to the world around us, for _three whole months_. "Ah, geez, I hope not." Not that I would object to having sex with Eric Northman that long, but, in a practical sense, if we were punch-drunk all that time, would that even be _safe_? "I mean, seems to me that being so distracted would be dangerous for that long," I clarified, off Lafayette's arch look.

Jesus frowned. "It does seem kind of a long time, I agree." He thought for a moment. "Sookie, about how long was it between the time you and Eric exchanged blood and when he disappeared?"

"Gosh, maybe four or five hours, I guess?" I answered.

"And how many days ago was that?" Jesus asked.

I did the calculations in my head. "Well, the day of the sun spell, right around sunset, so that was, what, the 28th? So … four days ago?"

Jesus's brow furrowed. "And you're still feeling this compulsion to get to Eric?"

I nodded. "Like some kind of magic magnet, yup."

The wheels were turning in the witch's head. "Well, let's say this is meant to represent three days – or nights, since we're talking vampires," Jesus said, tapping his finger on the three crescents. "If it meant three _literal_ nights, I think the magic would have finalized by now. By last night's sunset at the latest. But what if it's not literal nights?" Jesus looked excited now. "What if's meant to represent the amount of _time_ that you and Eric have to be together before the bond is completed?"

"Huh? I'm still not following," I said.

Lafayette's eyes brightened. "Aw, baby, I think I get what you sayin'! Sook, it's like _cookin'_…" Lafayette waved his hands while he explained. "Recipe calls for you to cook somethin' for 45 minutes. You set your timer, you watch it cook, and hopefully, it be done when the timer go off. It actually _takes_ 45 minutes." The cook tilted his head. "But what if you gets interrupted and you have to turn off the stove and leave the pan? Say, it only gets 10 minutes cookin' time before that happen." Lafayette gestured emphatically. "Whenever you come back to it, you have to finish the cookin' process. Could be ten minutes later, could be an hour, could be the next day. Don't matter because that dish still need to get to that full cookin' time before it's done. It still going to take you 45 minutes of heat for you to finish cooking what's in the pot before it done. Make sense?" Beside us, Jesus was nodding in agreement to the analogy.

I bit my lip. "Okay, so you're saying that Eric and me are like a—a half-cooked pot of something?"

"Well, that would be the best possibility, yes," Jesus cautioned. "It would mean that whatever the magical process is, it's got about two and three-quarters days of you and Eric being together to do its work before it completes the bond. Long enough to get the magical job done, but hopefully short enough that you two aren't put at risk while it's happening. Heck of a lot better than three months, I think."

"And what if we're not together?" I asked. "Will the magic just quit? Will the bond break then?" I wasn't entirely sure what answer I wanted to hear, but I did want to know exactly what the options were for Eric and me.

Jesus pondered. "I just don't know, Sookie. It could be that the magic will eventually quit trying to complete itself after some time if you aren't together to allow that, but if it's already been more than three days and you're still feeling the compelled to get as close to Eric as possible, I think it's not that likely. My guess is that you will probably feel those desires until you allow the bond to finish manifesting. And if you do, it will just take those couple of days to do that." Jesus shook his head. "I could be wrong, though. I'll have to see if we can figure out more."

"Well, we've got a freaking library to look in for answers," I sighed. "Are you up for looking for more right now?"

Two hours (and a check on Alcide, who was chopping wood in a broody way outside) later, we had at least glanced at every book in Eric's cubby. Lafayette had grown more relaxed as we sat pouring through the pages and had even tackled a couple of the books himself. Most of the volumes seemed to involve fairy lore, as I had noticed before, so I felt like we weren't gaining any more info. Finally, Jesus picked up the original book again, looking one more time to see if he could have missed some helpful detail.

I had gotten slightly sidetracked onto a description of suspected fae abilities in one of the other books when Jesus made a noise. "You find something?" I asked.

"I may not read the language, but some of these other words still look familiar," he said, gesturing at the page. "_Frigg. Freya. Loki." _He looked up. "They're from the Norse pantheon of gods and goddesses. I can't make heads or tails of what it is _saying_ about them, but given where they are in the text, it looks to me like this _blóðfesta_ bond is connected with the Norse gods somehow."

"Huh!" I exclaimed in surprise.

"Hey, didn't Godric say that both you and Eric had to look to your roots to understand this thing?" Lafayette said. "I know he mostly said you had to seek out 'your people,' I guess meaning your fairy ancestors, but maybe there's some part of Eric being a Viking that plays into this, too?"

"Could be," I replied, slowly. "Although I still don't get why fairies would know about _vampire_ magic. And it's going to be kind of tough to get information from 'my people,' given that my fairy relatives are all in another dimension I've got no interest in visiting again, thank you very much. Checking into Eric's ancestry might be the best option we have." I wrinkled my face up in consternation. "Although how do you figure something like that out with a 1,000-year-old vampire? It's not like has records going back that far."

"At least it's another trail to follow," Jesus said. "Do you know when Eric is going to be back? I'm assuming he actually reads this language, whichever one it is. If you're okay waiting until he gets back, maybe he can tell us more."

"No idea," I answered. "Although I'm hoping for tonight, as much for Alcide's sake as anything. I don't think Debbie is taking this little side job of his keeping an eye on me for Eric very well."

"So long as the girl ain't stupid enough to go complaining to Eric about it," Lafayette muttered. "I don't know that Eric would have much patience with that bitch, 'specially if he knows she the one that helped trash your house while tryin' to kill you before you went missin' last year."

Despite looking through the books for a while longer, we weren't able to figure out anything more before Lafayette had to leave for work, so I waved the witches goodbye with a promise to let them know as soon as I heard anything about Tara.

Alcide came back into the house once they were on their way, his skin glowing with the effort of having worked in my yard. His mood seemed to have headed south since the morning, though, and I was surprised to find him harder to read than usual. I wondered if it might be a were thing, because it seemed like the more his emotions got worked up – and while I couldn't actually feel his feelings, I could still tell he was cranky by his expression and body language – the more difficult it was to pick up actual thoughts. Everything just seemed all red and snarly inside.

"Alcide, you have any preference for dinner tonight?" I asked about an hour before sundown. When he grumbled some vague response, I sighed and leaned back against the kitchen sink. "Alcide, I know this has to be boring and frustrating as hell since not a thing has happened to justify your spending so much time twiddling your thumbs here with me. I'm _so sorry_ this has turned out to be such a waste of effort for you."

Alcide sank into a chair at the table with a grunt. "Sook, it ain't your fault or even Eric's that I'm in such a bad mood. I expected to do a lot of waiting around given the circumstances, and I'm frankly just as glad I didn't have to deal with any kind of attack on you." He shook his dark head. "I'm more upset by Debbie's attitude about this. I told her even though you and me are friends that this was just business for Eric as far as I was concerned. But she doesn't seem to trust my word, and that pisses me off. She ain't even picked up her phone since last night, and this morning, she switched over her voicemail to a bitchy message telling me to go screw myself if I did call."

Well, that was _real_ mature.

"Well, I'm sorry this is causing problems between you two," I said, sincere in my regret for him. I know if the shoe were on the other foot and it was _my_ boyfriend protecting some other woman, I might be unhappy, too, (depending on who it was) but I hoped I'd at least be a little more self-controlled in my response. "I'm hoping that when sunset comes tonight, maybe we'll hear something from Eric and you can finally get on home."

Alcide snorted. "Not sure I'm looking forward to it so much at the moment," he replied. "I just hope she doesn't use this as an excuse to break her sobriety." He looked down at the tablecloth, his eyes distant. "She'd been doing real good until the last few days, Sookie, honest. And I thought maybe hanging out with the local pack would make her feel more secure, but maybe I was too late in agreeing to that." A flash of guilt passed over his face. "This is just like before we broke up the last time. Same kind of fights over shit she was imagining was going on, same kind of accusations that I don't really love her –" Alcide cut himself off as if he'd said too much.

"How do you still love her?" I asked quietly, moving to join him at the table. "Even after all she did?"

He sigh was as heavy as the boulder that sat to one side of the local lake, the one that served as the jumping off point for anyone who wanted to cannonball into the water. "I've loved her since we was kids, Sookie. We've got a history together, and as bad as it has been between us after the V messed her up, there is probably always going to be a little piece of me that can't give up on the girl I first fell for. She's been trying, and I got to honor that."

I reached across the table and squeezed Alcide's hand in comfort. His hand reminded me of Eric's not only because they were similar in size, but because both were and vampire had hands that had done hard work in their day – Eric's, I assumed, in handling swords in battle and Alcide in working his construction job. Alcide's hand, of course, was much warmer than Eric's but what struck me was how that heat couldn't compete with the singing rush that Eric's touch now brought me. As I let Alcide's hand fall back to the table, I noticed he let my fingers go more reluctantly than I felt comfortable with. As I stood up, I changed the subject. "So, what can I get you for dinner?"

**~*E&S*~**

Alcide and I were just finishing up some simple hamburgers when I finally felt Eric wake up. As the hum of his consciousness kicked into gear, I glanced at the kitchen clock: it was a minute later than last night, but still a few minutes before the sun would actually set here in Bon Temps. "Alcide, is there a way to figure out where someplace is if you know the time the sun rises and sets there?" I asked before taking a small bite of French fry as if it was just an idle, curious thought that had occurred to me.

Alcide chewed his bite of burger before answering. "Well, you wouldn't be able to figure out _exactly_ where a place was that way unless you knew what direction the sun was coming up on the horizon, but you might be able to make some educated guesses about the general area. Why you asking?"

"Just something I was thinking about with the idea that vampires rise with the sunset," I answered (mostly) honestly. "Don't you think the timing's got to be local to wherever the vampire is? So, if a vampire woke up when the sun set at, say, 6:15 tonight, would it be possible to figure out where the vampire was?"

The vampire I was so specifically curious about probed my emotional state, and apparently satisfied with what he found, turned his focus to whatever was going on around him.

Alcide fiddled with his phone for a couple of minutes, awkwardly punching the keyboard with his large thumbs. "Well, sunset in Shreveport tonight is at 6:25, so wherever it would be would have to be to the east since the sun is setting earlier." He punched some more keys. "Baton Rouge has sunset at 6:17, so we're getting closer." He clicked some more, taking another bite of his meal between searches. "Here you go, Sook. The sun sets tonight at exactly 6:15 in New Orleans." He pushed his phone over to me to see the details on the screen.

_New Orleans._ It was to the southeast, which fit my sense of Eric was, so that would make sense. People joked about it being the vampire capital of the world; maybe that wasn't so far off from the truth if that's where Eric really was.

"So, what's really going here, Sook? Why would you even be thinking about where the sun could be setting at 6:15 tonight?" Alcide asked gruffly, dipping a french fry in ketchup and not meeting my eyes. "This is something to do with where Eric is, right?"

I shrugged one shoulder. "I just wondered if it was something you could figure out if you knew the sunset time. And maybe the direction the vampire was in."

Alcide frowned at me. "And do you _know_ which direction Eric is in?" he asked.

"I had an idea, yeah," I answered noncommittally.

"And you had an _idea _of _when_ he woke up tonight, too," he growled. "Sook, what the hell is going on here?" His nostrils flared as he deliberately took in my scent. "You still smell like Eric just as strong as you did when I first showed up at your house yesterday morning." He breathed in again. "Hell, maybe even stronger. I thought you said you thought that was just because his blood was so goddamn old." The brown eyes were accusing. "Something more is going on here. You got some kind of vampire bond with him or something? Is that why you asked Jesus and Lafayette to come over?" He stared. "Damn, is that part of whatever the hell you were doing trying to head off on that little road trip last night, too?"

I didn't even have to answer; he could read my answer on my face. Alcide smacked his hand down on the tabletop and rocked back. "Shit, Sookie – how could you get even more tightly bound up with Eric Northman?"

"Well, hey, way for you to be understanding of who _I _choose to love," I muttered. "And here I am trying to be understanding about Debbie, too."

Alcide groaned. "Aw, fuck, Sook, it's just that I'm worried about you. It's one thing knowing you're, uh, 'dating' him, but knowing you've got some kind of blood bond with him?" He shook his dark head. "Do you even know what you're doing?"

"Well, no, not really. Which is why I _did _ask for Jesus and Lafayette's help." I toyed with the paper napkin beside my plate. "And I thought you didn't want to know about Eric's business, magical or otherwise," I said, my voice dry.

"Hell, no, I don't." The big man sighed. "But damn, this involves you, and _you_ I care about."

"And I appreciate that, Alcide, I really do." I glanced up at his face. "But I don't want to get into the details of all this until I've had a chance to talk to Eric about what is going on between him and me. For all I know, the whole thing may be a moot point whenever he comes back from _wherever he is_ anyhow. We didn't exactly part on the best of terms." I rolled the edge of my napkin into a tight little coil.

Alcide rolled his eyes. "Well, for someone you parted on not-so-good-terms with, he sure was hell bent on making sure you were safe while he was gone," he said, begrudgingly. "Which I guess is something."

Through the bond, I could feel Eric's emotions beginning to shift. A strange mix of worry and anticipation had begun to escalate, the two feelings tumbling over one another. And twining through them, a steadily strengthening strand of tentative relief. Whatever was going on, Eric was feeling like things were starting to resolve – finally. Maybe he really _would_ be home – well, back closer to me, anyhow – before the end of the night.

Alcide and I ate in silence for a few minutes before the were cleared his throat. "Sook, you want me to see what I can find out about vampire bonds for you? Ask around a little?"

I swallowed the piece of fry I was eating and then nodded. "It might help, yes. Thank you, Alcide."

And just as I said that, I felt a little tingle of awareness, echoing through Eric's emotions in much the same way I had felt Pam. I realized with a start that I could already feel the barely perceptible trace that I associated with Eric's blonde progeny. It was so faint that it was hardly noticeable until I consciously looked for it – but I detected it, and realized that this new sensation was definitely not Pam.

Across the table, I vaguely heard Alcide saying something about a rumor he had heard about vampire bonds, but I wasn't really listening any longer. Instead, my attention was focused on the thin, frail thread of new consciousness I felt beginning to blossom. There was confusion, rapidly followed by fear, some sorrow, and a small rush of relief. Slowly the strength of the little river of feeling began to grow, although it was nowhere near as strong as what I felt from Eric himself.

It was strange enough to have that weird little echo of someone else coming through Eric, but what really stopped me cold, what made my heart suddenly begin to pound hard was the familiarity of what I felt.

If I hadn't helped Lafayette remove Bill's glamour earlier in the day, I might not have recognized the patterns, but my thinking back to my previous mental excursion into another magic-clouded mind in order to prepare for working with Lafayette had made the memories fresh.

And when the fragile, reflected trickle of emotions swelled into outright terror, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt: _I was feeling Tara Thornton._

**A/N: Eric will be back NEXT CHAPTER! Finally! I want it as much as you do, seriously, but I had to get things set up for what is to come. **

**One reminder: guest comments are moderated and may not post for as long as 36 hours depending on when I get around to signing into ff dot net. Unsigned reviews that are flat-out abusive will be deleted. I write these stories for fun and my own entertainment and I see absolutely NO REASON to put up with personal attacks. If you're that unhappy with how my story is going, stop reading it and write your own. That's what fanfic is FOR, people! **

**Big thanks to all those who express their opinions, whether negative or positive, in a respectful way. You rock; trolls don't. And a special shout out to Jan of Arc for the tip about melted butter in pancakes! **


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